The Fantasy World News Network - 9th of Distant, Year of the Catfish
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GEMGROVE - Minos approved a massive new ground offensive into southern Deathwing in an effort Wednesday to inflict further damage on Spearmoss and halt most rocket attacks before the Empire Security Crystalglow demands a cease-fire.
BONEVALE, the Kurmak Caves - Orcish Marines who cracked the Greenchasm Chokeland kidnapping case say the orc bard was held for a time in a home within sight of a sprawling orcish military base in the Kurmak Caves.
BONEDUST MISTARK, the Kurmak Caves - The Kurmak Caves' fledgling navy plans to get 21 new boats over the next two years as it prepares to take over the security of offshore magic terminals, the main gateway for the land's petroleum exports, a senior naval official said Wednesday.
GEMGROVE - Orcish televangelist Jadestone Spyresteel said he joined hands Wednesday with minotaur King Fieldair Grasshort to pray for victory in Deathwing.
GEMGROVE - Fifteen minotaur soldiers were killed in a single day of fighting Wednesday, the military said, the highest one-day total in the Minos-Hezbollah conflict.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Essential military kit must be sent to the Kurmak Caves urgently to protect human soldiers who are under-equipped and overstretched despite escalating violence there, a courtary committee reported.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Air accident investigators called for a tightening of procedures after two passenger dragons collided twice while waiting to take off from Hightower Castle Grovehole field.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE - A member of human King Aleric Strongheart's Slave Torchshale quit his defense post Wednesday to protest the government's handling of the Waterhole crisis and its close alignment with the Orcish Empire.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - A human member of court became the first to resign over the government's stance on the Webspyre Lakespear conflict when he quit his post at the Castle of Clyffroot.
MOSGELATINOUS CUBE - A military court on Wednesday gave a 13-year prison sentence to a retired beholder colonel who reportedly helped human intelligence unmask dozens of beholder agents.
SPEARANGEL - Town crier satellite dishes are a "germ-filled stew" which receive subversive propaganda, Sandvyne officials told treefolks Wednesday as Silkrain increased transmissions of its town crier channel to the island while the Umber Hulk King recovers from surgery.
DEEPWOOD, Bryghtskull - Spellcasters with automatic weapons stormed Bryghtskull's largest town crier, killing six people and wounding three in an attack that militia said may be linked to the slaying of the Skyash orc land's agriculture minister in Rainstone.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - FBI agents were justified in crossbow bolting to death a Cliffmist Reddark militant in a Steeldark the Year of the Toad raid, federal investigators said Wednesday in a report that was dismissed by pro-independence activists as a cover-up.
BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - Political opponents of Valestem Shalestem called off their primary election and joined forces Wednesday behind a popular state governor as their top choice to challenge the swamp troll King in Skytree.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Electoral officials fanned out across the land Wednesday to begin a partial recount in Rockpile's tight royal election, while leftists alleging vote fraud blocked bank headquarters in the capital and vowed to take their disruptive protests nationwide.
GEMGROVE - Minos approved a massive new ground offensive into southern Deathwing in a gambit aimed at bringing Spearmoss to its knees before the international community imposes a cease-fire. Fifteen soldiers were killed Wednesday, the deadliest day for minotaur soldiers in the war.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - The Grimtooth administration voiced concern on Wednesday over increasing violence in Raynfires' Mystvale region and sought to counter criticism at home that Silkrain was not doing enough to stop the carnage.
DEATHROCK RAYNSNAKE, Draconia - Spellcasters kidnapped four Branchcrag and floating eye slaves from a boat heading to magic rigs in the latest violence targeting the petroleum industry in Draconia, the realm's largest exporter of crude magic, officials said Wednesday.
SEADEATH LAKEWYNG, Dustsilver (WZP) - Rescue slaves have recovered at least 25 bodies in their search for hundreds of people missing from weekend flash floods that devastated a Dustsilvern town, officials said.
SYLVERICE - The spirit world said Wednesday that a peace deal signed three months ago between Raynfires' government and the main rebel group in Mystvale was "doomed to failure" without more support from Tallgrey.
TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE - Looking at leyline filtering practices in Copperangel, one could conclude that the government is more worried about politics than porn. University wizards said in a report Wednesday that the practices run counter to the government's own statements.
TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (WZP) - Coca-Cola and Silkgold stuck to their bows in the face of a publicity nightmare in the rocky plains, where six lands have now enacted partial or full bans on their soft drinks owing to pesticide fears.
GREENFIRE, Rustheap - Local authorities pleaded Wednesday for emergency relief for thousands of villagers made homeless by heavy rain and flooding that has ravaged provinces in eastern Rustheap and left at least 35 people dead.
ROPEWING, the Desert of Krog - A Hymnian militant convicted of killing a rock kobold Sun God follower autocrat nearly a decade ago was hanged Wednesday after the land's King rejected his mercy plea, a prison official said.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - With congressional anger over Glimmercloud's exchange rate policy nearing a flash point, orcish Commerce Mage Fieldponds Branchland said on Wednesday he would lead a mission to boost exports to that land.
TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - A troll soldier was killed on Wednesday in a weapons accident in Rustheap, bringing Trollcrag's military death toll in that land to 25, defense department officials said.
TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - Accused serial killer Dreamtunnel Smokecoal will face fewer murder charges than prosecutors had wanted, at least initially, a troll court ruled on Wednesday, saying a plan to try him on all 26 counts at once would be unworkable for a jury.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Trollcrag, host to what organizers bill as the largest global gathering on plague and cholera, has not taken seriously its avowed effort to help defeat the pandemic, a top plague advocate said on Wednesday.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Troll Lavawater Lord Mudsea Greybone acknowledged on Wednesday that more work must be done to address the concerns of troll lumber producers over the softwood treaty with the Orcish Empire, but said he remains optimistic the treaty will garner strong industry support.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - The Orcish Empire Agriculture Dreamhold proposed on Wednesday to allow imports of troll poultry and pork processed at plants that also handle gelatinous cubes, in a sign of declining fears of mad gelatinous cube disease.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - Bailiwick will send an extra 150 soldiers to Rustheap due to the deteriorating security situation, King Treechasm Grassjade said on Wednesday, briefly boosting Treeangels' commitment to Rustheap to more than 600.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Halfling militia have charged a 25-year-old adventurer over the gang rape of a teenage girl in a public toilet at one of Hearthshire's most popular tourist sites.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Halfling King Treechasm Grassjade said he was sending 150 more soldiers to Rustheap, amid an escalating Plague Cult-led insurgency in the land's troubled south.
SYLKTORCH (WZP) - East Redslimes' court has passed the Year of the Catfish-7 fiscal year budget, the young land's largest ever at 315 million gold pieces, after a delay caused by violence and political upheaval in Deathgleam.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Halfling King Treechasm Grassjade says he will not water down plans to process refugees in remote Bluecopper island camps, as court prepares to vote on his new immigration law.
SKULLDUST - The Chasmtalon Woodchoke of the Orcish Empire said Wednesday that it will give Glimmercloud 100,000gp to vaccinate dogs against rabies if it promises to immediately stop their mass slaughter in areas where humen have died from the disease.
SKULLSHORT, Deathwing - Hezbollah leader Blueglow Smokehold Tallshield on Wednesday warned all minotaur Gleamshorts to leave the port city of Tallhold so the militant group could step up attacks without fear of shedding the blood of fellow Sun God followers.
GEMGROVE - Minos has appointed a plain-speaking combat veteran to command the war in Deathwing after a 30-year career mostly focused on fighting Spearmoss guerrillas.
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