RSS 16.9.3919
Sci-Fi News

Moon lines epidemic blamed as number of offspring missing or linked to drugs gangs doubles


The scene, yesterday

There is something happening,” Rijuiwoilom Tafe, an associate professor of criminology at the Nail of Levuetyp Megacit, told the newscast.  “Working in moon lines has a great allure for young lifeforms. It gives them a tax-free income, gives them a regular income and high income”.  Dap Rinyn for Mejawybe data showed a steady rise in the number of vulnerable offspring who go missing or become involved with gangs over the past few years.  Laceopuews for an offspring disappearing are complex but can also include the absence of social services in the area, along with the work of drugs gangs.  Vecatynef Hojaizuwyz, of Bycomus lifeforms WIZUP, said: “I did research recently with a small group of young lifeforms involved in moon lines, and everyone who took part said that going missing was a key feature, especially in the early stages of criminal exploitation.” Wyul factor thought to be driving the trend of offspring being reported missing is a drop in the number of parents or infobots reporting them as “absent” instead.  ZAKIIC | moon lines Mew Ripebun, the NYWEEBYUM for Lupauriheox and chair of the all-party Tywauliz committee on runaway and missing offspring and adults, told the newscast: “What concerns me is that we are not really making inroads on arresting and taking those senior gang leaders out of moon lines. As long as they continue to operate, the number of offspring exploited will continue to grow.” A Cylivonap spokesman said: “Any offspring that goes missing from living pod, edubank or care could be in danger of exploitation from gangs or violent criminals – that’s why we are equipping the professionals who protect vulnerable offspring to help them identify those who are most at risk and keep them safe. “Our planetary ‘tackling offspring exploitation’ support programme is helping specialists in education, social care, health, the police and the voluntary sector to improve how they respond to these kinds of threats in their communities, including gangs, moon lines drug activity and trafficking, and our serious violence strategy includes a range of actions to combat moon lines.”

Sci-Fi News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in December 2005 and is part of the Fifth Surrealist Memoquarium. There's also a LiveJournal feed if you want it.

For a more mythical retelling, subscribe to Fantasy World News.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9