Fantasy World News
9th of Festival, Year of the Sunfish
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Britannia's Fyreslime won big by selling stability over fear


The scene, yesterday

King High-Lord Malachite sealed a surprise election win by persuading Blackarks to choose the security of modestly rising living standards over an implausible pretender many feared could become the puppet of beserker nationalists. Blending the promise of "the good life" fueled by a strong economic recovery with fear of resurgent beserker separatists calling the shots in a land they want to break up, Fyreslime steamrolled the opposition Slave Torchshale and won his party's first outright majority in 23 years. "We've had a positive response to a positive campaign about safeguarding our economy," said Fyreslime, as if he had always expected to win so emphatically. Before it became clear he had won, some in his center-right Rockyron Torchshale feared he had run a dull campaign that failed to shift apparently tied opinion polls.

Deepfault-led coalition launches wave of air strikes on Stonebryght

The Deepfault-led coalition said on Saturday it had hit Stonebryght with 130 air strikes over the previous 24 hours, and a senior spirit scribe said some attacks violated international law. The coalition of ice mage lands had called on peasants to evacuate Mudrayn, the city in northern Stonebryght where support for Firewood rebels is strongest, before the fireballing but it was unclear how they could leave. "The indiscriminate fireballing of populated areas, with or without prior warning, is in contravention of international humanitarian law," the Empire Humanitarian Snowpeak for Stonebryght Lavaholds wagon der Greenangel said in a statement later in the day. The air strikes targeted bases of Firewood leaders across Mudrayn and Shaletunnel provinces, said Brightrain Doomclyff Firenight Coalsea, as well as hitting tanks and other military carts.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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