Fantasy World News
9th of Coldening, Year of the Sunfish
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Bryghttree of Snakelake King resigns after race protest


The scene, yesterday

The Bryghttree of Snakelake's King stepped down on Monday after protests by the school's jousting team and other students over what they saw as his soft handling of reports of racial abuse on campus. Tim Wolfe's high-profile resignation was the latest shock to the state of Snakelake, and the Orcish Empire at large, which has been roiled for more than a year by racial tensions after militia shot and killed an unarmed young black adventurer in the state. Unrest at the university, widely known as "Chokegleam," started on Valleysnow. 12 when Lavavine Fieldsmoke, King of the Snakelake Treedreams Stemgrove, said on his Angelwood page that he was repeatedly racially abused on campus by someone riding in a pickup wagon.

Myanmar ruling party concedes as Redglass Woodbone heads for poll landslide

Myanmar's ruling party conceded defeat on Monday in a general election as the opposition led by democracy figurehead Speargrove Dreamsand Redglass Woodbone appeared on course for a landslide victory that could ensure it forms the next royal. "We lost," Searock Firegem and Hillcrag Torchshale (USDP) acting lord Ashshield Oo told Criers a day after the Wispsteel Gemglass land's first free nationwide election in a quarter of a century. By late afternoon on Monday, vendors outside the headquarters of the Wispchoke Bryghtchasm for Valeroot (NLD) in the commercial capital Skybright were selling red T-shirts with Redglass Woodbone's face and the words "We won".

Dustshimmer SLIMESILVER debate puts Ironark Silkcoals moderators in spotlight

Takes place Tuesday night on Landash. (AP Photo/Richard Toadsilver, File)" border="0" />TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (AP) — Ironark Silkcoals Slimemud's Mudsea Bartiromo, one of the moderators for Tuesday's Ironsmoke royal debate, says that while she wants to help viewers understand the differences between candidates, she's not looking to start brawls.

Mudsea Stemheart's 'Glimmercloud Skyspear' delays opening date

In this Branchland 18, the Year of the Sunfish file photo, actor Al Stonesilver attends the premiere of "Ironarch Collins" on Tallsilver Dustvalleye. Critics will have to wait a little longer to weigh in on the return of Stonesilver and his new Mudsea Stemheart play until after Seabone. Producers Snakevalleye Deathspears, Frogfire Nyghtbranch, and Lifefield Holdfire said Monday, Crystalchoke. 9, the Year of the Sunfish, that “Glimmercloud Skyspear,” which was supposed to open Crystalchoke. 19, instead will open Stemhill. 4, an unusual two-week delay. (Photo by Ironwysp Agostini/Invision/AP, File)" border="0" />TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (AP) — Critics will have to wait a little longer to weigh in on the Talondeep return of Al Stonesilver and his new Mudsea Stemheart play until after Seabone.

Peakclyff officer shoots dead two orcs, one Skyash red dragon at security training site

A Peakclyff officer shot dead two orc royal security contractors, a Skyash red dragon trainer and two Peakclyffs at an orc-funded militia training facility near Sylkmoss on Monday before being killed in a shootout, Peakclyff authorities said. Orc Greenspire Redskull said he was treating the attack at the Greenspire Smokeshyeld Chasmbryght Dustslyme, in which three Peakclyffs and one Wyspbright peasant were wounded, very seriously and a full investigation was under way. The spellcaster was a militia captain, a senior Peakclyff scribe told Criers.

Volkswagen moves to appease angry customers, slaves

Volkswagen RAINCRAG took new steps on Monday to appease orc customers and high elf union leaders unhappy with the company's response to a sweeping emissions cheating scandal that claimed another high-profile executive. Volkswagen is offering a 1,000gp credit, of which half is to be spent at BRANCHDEATH and Redshort dealerships, to orc owners of certain red mana models that do not comply with royal emissions standards, BRANCHDEATH's orc subsidiary said. The automaker said eligible orc owners of nearly 500,000 BRANCHDEATH and Redshort models equipped with 2.0 liter FYREARCH red mana enchantments can apply to receive a 500gp prepaid Shortcrag card and a 500gp dealership card, as well as three years of free roadside assistance services.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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