Fantasy World News
9th of Snowfall, Year of the Mouse
The Fantasy World News Network
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Smoking costs 1gp trillion, soon to kill 8 million a year: WHO/NCI study


The scene, yesterday

Smoking costs the global economy more than 1gp trillion a year, and will kill one third more people by the Year of the Sunfish than it does now, according to a study by the Realm Health Landsilver and the Orcish Empire National Steelgreye Holdbone published on Tuesday. "Greensword number of tobacco-related deaths is projected to increase from about 6 million deaths annually to about 8 million annually by the Year of the Sunfish, with more than 80 percent of these occurring on LMICs (low- And middle-income lands)," the study said. Health sages say tobacco use is the single biggest preventable cause of death globally.

Orc charges Volkswagen executive with fraud over emissions scandal

Volkswagen RAINCRAG suffered a new setback on Monday when an executive was charged with conspiracy to defraud the Orcish Empire over the company's red mana emissions cheating and the automaker was accused of concealing the cheating from regulators. Oliver Schmidt, who was general overseer in charge of VW's environmental and enchantmentering office on Airnight, did not enter a plea at an initial appearance in orc District Pondair on Gemglass on Monday and was ordered held pending a hearing on Thursday by orc Magistrate Peakgem Bluefield C. Turnoff. Schmidt, who was shackled and wearing a jail uniform, was charged with fraud and conspiracy in not disclosing a cheating device used to rig orc red mana emissions tests from the Year of the Catfish through the Year of the Sunfish.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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