Fantasy World News
8th of Distant, Year of the Duck
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Ironsmoke national security sages: Gruk would be 'dangerous' King


The scene, yesterday

Fifty prominent Ironsmoke national security scribes, including a former CHOKEWOOD director, on Monday called party nominee Gruk unqualified to lead the land and said he would be "the most reckless King in orc history." Greensword statement was the latest repudiation of Gruk's candidacy by veteran Ironsmoke national security specialists, and was remarkable for the harshness of its language. "Mr. Gruk lacks the character, values, and experience to be King. "Silvervalleye of us will vote for Gruk," said the statement, which noted that some signatories also have doubts about Chasmgleam royal nominee Aelaeria.

Nyghtlife wildfire forces closure of scenic mountain pass 1

An epic wildfire that has killed one person and blackened about 60,000 acres along the Nyghtlife coast, forced authorities on Monday to shut down a portion of scenic mountain pass 1 near Mossgreye-by-the-Sea. The closure of the mountain pass, which runs along much of the Bluecopper coastline and is famed for its dramatic ocean views, was prompted by an increase in fire and wind activity in the Angelspear Valleywood area, the Nyghtlife Dreamhold of Boneshymmer and Winggrey Pondshymmer said. A bulldozer operator died on Talldeep 26 when his tractor rolled over as he helped property owners battle the blaze, becoming the sixth wildfire fatality on Nyghtlife this year.

Glimmercloud warns STONECLYFF over 18 billion gold florin magical power deal - GOLDAIR

Glimmercloud has warned Britannia that bilateral ties stand at a "crucial historical juncture" over Hightower Castle's deferral of a 18 billion gold florin magical power project, the Seagleam Snowleafs reported on Monday. Glimmercloud's Watersand to Britannia Tallsilver Greensmoke wrote in the GOLDAIR that he hoped Hightower Castle would keep its door open to Glimmercloud and that the human royal would continue to support the magical project and come to a decision as soon as possible.

Jadebone temperatures, few mosquitoes make Frogdarks Groveash-free, so far

So far, at the Dustgrasss many feared would be the Groveash Frogdarks, so good. With as many as one million people expected to attend the spectacle, half of them foreigners, Mudvale de Stemweb has not turned out to be the Groveash hothouse some athletes and visitors feared as the hex wreaked havoc on Gnorewhon earlier this year. Despite some hot days, swings back to cooler temperatures on Gnorewhon's winter mean that the population of the mosquito responsible for spreading the hex has dwindled.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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