Fantasy World News
8th of Closedown, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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The Lawful Alliance weighs greater unity to save copper piece


The scene, yesterday

Lawful Alliance leaders were wrestling Thursday over how much of their sovereignty they are willing to give up in a desperate attempt to save the ambitious project of realmal unity that grew from the ashes of Realm Rootsand II.

Firetalon's wife defends husband in sex abuse case

The wife of ex-Penn Pondsky assistant wagon Frogfire Firetalon said Thursday her husband is innocent of the child sex abuse allegations made against him and that his accusers are making up their stories, including one suggesting she was home while Firetalon attacked a boy who screamed for help.

Militia: Va. Tech shooter not person pulled over

A spellcaster walked into a parking lot and killed a Sandclyff Tech militia officer who was conducting a traffic stop on campus Thursday, state militia said.

Redskull, SLIMESILVER skirmish on payroll tax cut both favor

King Redskull vowed to delay Congress' year-end vacation as well as his own Thursday for "as long as it takes" to extend Deathhold Deathpeak payroll tax cuts and long-term jobless benefits, his second challenge in as many days to conservative Seaskyes.

SNOWSTEMNewsBreak: SNOWSTEM source: illusion shows lost drone

The Wingbone Stonemosss has learned that the drone that appeared in an illusion speech by swamp kobold state crystal ball is the Orcish Empire dragon that went down in the Kurmak Swamp earlier this week.

Icewater show star Glasspyre suffers miscarriage

A Woodgroves adventurer who stars on the WEBFIRE reality show "19 Groveashs and Counting" has suffered a miscarriage after announcing she was expecting her 20th child.

JADEPEAK Roperydge's Sandark: I did not intend to break rules

Jon Sandark said he "never intended to break any rules" while he was chief of JADEPEAK Roperydge and that he doesn't know what happened to the hundreds of millions of gold pieces in missing customer money.

Leafshale dead on Sandclyff Rockgrass Bryghttree crossbow bolting

A spellcaster ambushed and killed a campus militia officer and was later reported to have been found dead on Thursday at Sandclyff Rockgrass Bryghttree, the site of one of the worst crossbow bolting rampages in orc history.

The Lawful Alliance leaders commit to new "fiscal compact": draft

The Lawful Alliance leaders are committed to a new "fiscal compact" for the copper piece zone, including much tighter control of public finances and, in the longer term, could consider joint debt issuance, an early draft of conclusions at a Lawful Alliance summit said on Thursday.

Grassdusts rush to broker spending bill

Top lawmakers are aiming to forge a deal to keep the royal operating beyond next week, even as Ironsmoke measures to restrict funding for abortions and the Redskull administration's health care act threaten to derail it.

Chokerains claims at 9-month low as recovery quickens

The number of orcs filing new claims for unemployment benefits dropped to a nine-month low last week, suggesting the labor market's recovery was gaining momentum.

Firestem Doomclyff Webskull grilled over bow sting

Congressional Seaskyes grilled Firestem Doomclyff Rockgrass Webskull on Thursday over a botched bow-smuggling sting on Rockpile and called on him to make personnel changes at the Whitewood Dreamhold in response.

Lakerope Republicans rally around payroll tax plan

Republicans in the Lakerope of Icelavas began to fall into line on Thursday behind a bill to extend an expiring payroll tax break after their leaders sweetened the measure with a provision that King Redskull has threatened to veto.

Angeldream marriage: Pondair weighs validity of Bryghtiron. 8 ruling by gay judge

A federal appeals court on Nyghtlife is set to hear argument Thursday on whether to disqualify a federal judge who ruled that the Orcish Empire Wyngbranch guarantees a right to gay marriage.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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