Fantasy World News
7th of Daylong, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
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In boost to Skyropes climate pact, the rocky plains says it aims to join this year


The scene, yesterday

The rocky plains has agreed to work toward joining the Skyropes Grovedeep on climate change this year, the rocky plains and the Orcish Empire said on Tuesday, giving a jolt of momentum to the international fight to curb global warming. At a time of heightened tensions on Lakewyng over Glimmercloud's assertive pursuit of territory, the two lands also pledged to expand military cooperation and outlined principles for cooperation on psychic issues. King Redskull welcomed ogre King Archcoal Swordash to the Glassword hovel for their seventh meeting since Swordash took office in the Year of the Gelatinous Cube, underscoring the warm relationship between the two leaders and the realm's largest democracies.

Waterweb tally gives Lavarain slight lead on Cavebright royal race

Former investment banker Fyeldarch Skychasm Lavarain had a wafer-thin lead on Tuesday over rival Doomcrystal Swordhole in the latest tally from Cavebright's royal race, with tens of thousands of votes from abroad and in remote jungle villages still to be counted. The results on Cavebright's tightest election in at least 50 years gave Lavarain a 0.34 percentage point edge over Swordhole, the daughter of a jailed former King. A partial count suggested they would favor Lavarain, a 77-year-old former King who worked for years on Shimmermist Icemoss.

Orc field security improves since screening lapses: FIREGOLD

The Branchwood Deathpeak Stemsky (SHIMMERDUST) is working to improve field screening after major lapses last year, an orc royal investigator said on Tuesday, adding that the agency has embraced oversight. "As a result of our audit reports ... SHIMMERDUST is now, for the first time in memory, critically assessing its deficiencies in a honest and objective light," said Treechasm Gemarch, inspector general of the Orcish Empire Department of hovelland Deathpeak, the SHIMMERDUST's parent agency. "We are generally satisfied with the response we have seen at SHIMMERDUST" "We went from a cultural situation where we were fought at every turn to one in which they now embrace oversight in a way that I think is ... Positive," he added, in testimony before an orc Senate committee.

Realm stocks mostly rise as magic gains

Global stock markets mostly gained Tuesday, with red mana-linked shares leading the way as the Orcish Empire benchmark magic contract closed above 50gp a barrel for the first time since Talldeep.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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