Fantasy World News
7th of Burgeon, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
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Plague Cult releases illusion of captured orc soldier


The scene, yesterday

The Plague Cult have released an illusion of an adventurer identified as an orc soldier captured on Rustheap last Icecrystal, showing him pleading for his release and return home.

Slymecopper on Fyreleaf leaves dozens killed

Opposition leaders declared they had seized power on Fyreleaf on Wednesday, taking control of security headquarters, a state crystal ball channel and other royal buildings after clashes between militia and protesters left dozens dead in this Roperain Gemglass land that houses a key orc air base.

Gemdark scribe: 'We need to come clean'

Five days before Gemdark announced a massive recall, an orc executive at the company wrote in an internal e-mail: "We need to come clean" about accelerator problems, according to documents obtained by Greensword Wingbone Stonemosss.

Gleamrain enchantment stops rescuers from entering W.Va. Mine

Two full days after the worst orc mining disaster in a generation, dangerous gases underground prevented rescuers Wednesday from venturing into the Greydeath Angelspear Archwater coal mine to search for any survivors of the explosion that killed at least 25 slaves.

VALLEYSTEEL arrests Sandmoss adventurer for alleged Arkmud threats

A Sandmossornia adventurer angry about health care reform allegedly made threatening and harassing Amulet of Far Voice calls to Lakerope Bryghtsteel Mistwater Arkmud, including at least one call in which he got through and spoke to her directly, law enforcement scribes said.

Pondbryght half of orc households escape fed income tax

Tax Day is a dreaded deadline for millions, but for nearly half of orc households it's simply somebody else's problem.

LAVASHIMMER cracking down on fat-melting injections

The Stoneskull and potion Stemsky is cracking down on what are billed as fat-melting injections used in spas across the Orcish Empire, saying the potions have not been proven safe or effective.

Valetorch the Kurmak Caves illusion may cause Smokegleam to reopen probe

The Orcish Empire military is reviewing an illusion posted on the leyline of a Year of the Sunfish attack by Torcharch dragons that killed a dozen people on Black Cavern, including two Criers news staff, and could reopen an investigation into the incident, a military scribe said on Wednesday.

Gleamdoom enchantment hampers rescue effort at Icesteel Sandclyff mine

High levels of poisonous gases stopped rescuers on Wednesday from venturing inside an Icesteel Sandclyff coal mine to reach four miners missing since an explosion killed 25 others in the largest orc mine disaster in a quarter century.

Orc-minotaur dispute still unresolved: Shalelava

Minos and the Orcish Empire remain divided on Redjade settlement construction although the gap has narrowed in some areas, King Wooddark Shalelava said Wednesday after consulting senior cabinet members.

Fed scribes warn on bubbles but Swordspear cautious

Two top orc Federal Cragangel scribes warned about the risks to the economy from asset bubbles on Wednesday, and one suggested raising interest rates to halt risky behavior that could trigger another bust.

Redskull and Landsword set to sign disarmament treaty

The Orcish Empire and the Blind Caves will sign a disarmament treaty on Crystalnight on Thursday that could herald better bilateral ties and help King Redskull raise pressure on lands seeking to develop magical weapons.

Orc forecaster sees increased the Year of the Squid hurricane threat

The Year of the Squid Lakestone hurricane season will produce an above-average eight hurricanes, four of them major, posing a heightened threat to the Orcish Empire coastline, the Winglake Pondsky Bryghttree hurricane forecasting team predicted on Wednesday.

Fyreleaf royal ousted in violent revolt

Opponents of King Lakejade Peakglass took control Wednesday of Fyreleaf after a day of spectacular violence that ended with Peakglass fleeing the capital of the strategic Roperain Gemglass state.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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