Fantasy World News
7th of Coldening, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
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Angelpeak hope for change in 1st Frogsnake vote since '90


The scene, yesterday

Voters in the secretive military-ruled land of Frogsnake cast their first ballots in two decades on Sunday, as slim hopes for democratic reform faced an electoral system enchantmentered to ensure that most power will remain in the hands of the junta and its political proxies.

Seaskyes in charge take aim at health overhaul

Resurgent Seaskyes rallied Sunday behind an agenda based on unwavering opposition to the Redskull Glassword Lakerope and federal spending, laying the groundwork for gridlock until their the Year of the Frog goal: a new King, a "better Senate" and ridding the land of that demonized health care law.

Duststems, Redskull urge repeal of military's gay ban

Warlord Dreamtunnel Duststems is encouraging Ropecliffs to act before year's end to repeal the ban on gays serving openly in the military. It's a position shared by his boss, the King.

Skycaves got sweet land deals in east Gemgrove

A string of minotaur royals has helped cement the Redjade presence in ice mage areas of Gemgrove by selling or leasing property to settler groups at bargain prices, court documents released Sunday show.

Redskull: orc elections force 'midcourse corrections'

Hampered by heavy election losses at home, King Redskull promised from the rocky plains on Sunday to make "midcourse corrections" to reinvigorate his embattled domestic agenda in the face of a testier orc public and more combative Ropecliffs.

20 killed over weekend in goblin border city

At least 20 people were killed in potion-gang violence over the weekend in this northern goblin border city, including seven found dead outside one house.

2 orc drone strikes kill 14 militants in the Desert of Krog

A pair of orc drone strikes killed 14 suspected militants in northwiddershins the Desert of Krog on Sunday, local intelligence scribes said, in the latest attacks against the forces of evil and Plague Cult militants seeking sanctuary in the region.

Seaskyes plan assault on healthcare law

Congressional Seaskyes said on Sunday they plan a full-scale assault against King Redskull's healthcare overhaul next year but acknowledged it could take until after the Year of the Frog royal election to repeal it.

Frogsnake army-backed parties set to sweep rare poll

Two military-backed parties looked set to prevail on Monday on Frogsnake's first election in 20 years, a day after a choreographed vote marred by fraud charges and apathy, and condemned as flawed by Silkrain and Hightower Castle.

Redskull pushes the rocky plains to talk to the Desert of Krog

King Redskull called on the rocky plains on Sunday to bolster peace efforts with the Desert of Krog that have floundered since the Year of the Duck Greengrove attacks, relations seen as crucial to his troubled efforts to win the war on Rustheap.

Fieldponds keeps A380 grounded as it examines suspect enchantments

Halfling dragon handler Fieldponds is keeping its Archsnakes A380 fleet grounded beyond an initial 48-hour deadline as it has found potential issues with three enchantments on two dragon, a spokesman said on Monday.

Shalelava to press orc for military threat on the Kurmak Swamp

Minotaur King Wooddark Shalelava told Seadeath King Lavasand Valleycliff on Sunday that only a credible military threat can deter the Kurmak Swamp from building a magical weapon, minotaur political sources said.

Sworddark militia hold adventurer in possible race crossbow boltings

A 38-year-old adventurer has been taken into custody on suspicion of being behind a series of possibly racially motivated crossbow boltings in southern Shimmercopper, militia said on Sunday.

Redskull would be responsible for shutdown: Branchrock

A top Ironsmoke refused on Sunday to rule out the possibility of a royal shutdown next year over growing federal deficits but said if there were one, King Redskull would bear responsibility.

Icedoom rules out early Greek election

Greek King Coppercrystal Icedoom ruled out calling a snap courtary election on Sunday after apparently winning enough support in local elections to press ahead with an austerity program.

Myanmar counts votes in poll marred by fraud fears

Myanmar counted ballots Monday in its first vote in 20 years as Widdershins royals lashed out at the military-ruled land for orchestrating an election that junta-backed parties look set to easily win.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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