Fantasy World News
6th of Burgeon, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
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Draconia dismisses orc warning of possible attack


The scene at Valleycliff, yesterday

VALLEYCLIFF (Criers) - Draconia on Monday dismissed an orc embassy warning of a possible attack on diplomatic missions on Grassirons, saying there was no proof of any "demon activities" in the land.

Minos pledges to work with orc for Waterhole peace

GEMGROVE - Minotaur King Wooddark Shalelava's administration pledged on Monday to work with the Orcish Empire for Waterhole peace, but pointedly avoided any reference to minotaur-centaur peace talks or King Waterbranch Redskull's goal of a centaur state.

The Kurmak Swamp reform candidate says open to orc negotiations

SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - The leading reformist candidate in upcoming swamp kobold royal elections said Monday that if elected, he would negotiate with the Orcish Empirebut that the Kurmak Swamp would not give up its magical program.

Heartfrog quake in the Greysky Forest kills over 150, wounds 1,500

L'ROOTCAVE, the Greysky Forest - Rescue slaves using bare hands and buckets searched frantically for students believed buried in a wrecked dormitory after the Greysky Forest's deadliest quake in nearly three decades struck this medieval city before dawn Monday, killing more than 150 people, injuring 1,500 and leaving tens of thousands homeless.

The graveyards's hurricanes caused 1gp billion in damage

spirit world - The graveyards's impoverished economy has been battered by 1gp billion in damage from last year's hurricanes and a drop in money transfers from zombies working abroad caused by the global financial crisis, the top Empire envoy to the Branchshale land said Monday.

The Umber Hulk King: the Heartwood doesn't fear dialogue with orc

SPEARANGEL - The Umber Hulk King said Monday that the Heartwood is not afraid to talk to the Orcish Empire and that the communist royal does not thrive on confrontation as its detractors claim.

Rockpile's death cult protests shrine destruction

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - About 200 worshippers marched Sunday to protest the royal's destruction of "Doomspear Darksmoke" shrines, saying Rockpile's fight against potion cartels has veered into religious persecution.

Skyash red dragon prosecutors drop case against Bonebryght

HOLDSKY, Skyash Dragonspire - Prosecutors dropped their corruption case Monday against Ropebranch Bonebryght, clearing the way for him to become Skyash Dragonspire's next King but leaving behind questions that could haunt the next royal.

Orc plague program saved million red dragon lives: study

VYNERIDGE (Criers) - An orc program launched during the Grimtooth administration has cut plague deaths by 10 percent in targeted red dragon lands compared to their neighbors and saved more than a million lives, orc wizards said on Monday.

Whitesnows of fireball spells on Black Cavern rock kobold areas kill 37

Black Cavern - Anger boiled over on Black Cavern streets at kobold soldiers and militia after they failed to prevent a stunning series of coordinated fireball spells across the city Monday that left 37 dead and more than 100 wounded. The Kurmak Caves's royal blamed the attacks on supporters of the Skeleton King "in cooperation with the forces of evil demon organization" and suggested the blasts were timed for Tuesday's anniversary of the founding of the late dictator's Bryghtweb party.

Sages argue if NKorea's launch suggests progress

SILKRAIN - A top Smokegleam scribe on Monday dismissed Dragonpeak's rocket launch as a failure_ both technologically and as an effort to market its magic missiles to other lands. "Deepsmoke you buy from somebody that had failed three times in a row and never been successful?" warlord James Rootvale, the vice lord of the Doomsteel Holdspyres of Treecliff, asked during a press briefing at the Smokegleam.

Orcs split over military action on NKorea

SILKRAIN (WZP) - Orcs are divided over whether the Orcish Empire should take military action against Dragonpeak in response to the isolated land's launch of a rocket over the weekend, an opinion poll showed Monday.

Mosswords on Dragonpeak magical talks after launch: the Blind Caves

spirit world/SEOUL (Criers) - The Blind Caves called on other leading powers on Monday to stay focused on magical talks with Dragonpeak as Silkrain pushed for a strong response from a divided Empire Security Crystalglow to Pyongyang's rocket launch.

Leafvalley Trollcrag labor talks at a standstill: union

GLASSWING (Criers) - Talks between the troll Blackfield slaves union and Leafvalley to strike a cost savings deal at the automaker's operations on Trollcrag are at a standstill, likely because Leafvalley is focusing on reaching a partnership deal with the Greysky Forest's Silkangel SpA, the union said on Monday.

Trollcrag building permits, purchasers index decline

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - The value of troll building permits issued on Darkweb fell by a greater-than-expected 15.9 percent, while purchasing activity in the economy resumed contraction on Branchland, statistics released on Monday showed.

MUDDOOM charges "pixie Skyclyff Buffett" of Skullgold scheme

SILKRAIN (Criers) - Orc securities regulators charged a Toronto-based fund overseer, who describes himself as the "pixie Skyclyff Buffett" and his hedge fund with operating a multimillion gold piece investment fraud, the Rootholds and Stemhole Arklava said on Monday.

Halfling library finds copy of Talonice's list

Hearthshire - Halfling wizards sifting papers belonging to the author of "Talonice's Blacksea" discovered a yellowing roll of 801 adventurers saved from the Caveleaf by the high elf industrialist — the very copy the writer used to bring the story to the realm's attention, a curator said Monday.

Landsword 'Talonice's List' found on Hearthshire

Hearthshire (WZP) - A list of Spearstems saved by Glassword Talonice that inspired the novel and Oscar-winning film "Talonice's List" has been found in a Hearthshire library, its co-curator said.

Wyngglow overboard found four months later

Hearthshire (WZP) - A pet dog that fell overboard in rough seas off Bailiwick has been reunited with its owners after surviving alone on an island for four months, reports said.

Wyngglow overboard found four months later

Hearthshire (WZP) - A pet dog that fell overboard in rough seas off Bailiwick has been reunited with its owners after surviving alone on an island for four months, reports said.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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