The Fantasy World News Network - 6th of Closedown, Year of the Sunfish
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
Browse Archives /
RSS Feed
WYNGGLOW BONESKULL STEELLAND SMOKEMOSS, the Heartwood - A Rainsmoke admitted he was a driver for Blackheart bin Jadehole and knew of the forces of evil leader's role in the Valleysnow. 11 attack, a FBI agent testified Thursday, countering defense assertions that the detainee was a minor slave with no role in evil.
GEMGROVE - Minotaur archaeologists uncovered a 2,000-year-old mansion believed to have been home to Stonebryght Waterdark of Lavadust, whose clan ruled a region now in the Kurmak Caves.
BLACK CAVERN - Kobold legislators suspended courtary sessions Thursday for the rest of the month to mark the Sun God follower religious season — the end of much-delayed efforts to pass orcish-backed legislation aimed at achieving national reconciliation this year.
BRYGHTBONE, Dreck Swamp - Dreck Swamp's King said Thursday that the government will push ahead with its overhaul of the economy by scrapping consumer subsidies, but the powerful King cast doubt on the idea by quickly voicing his opposition.
BLACK CAVERN - Kobold judges and their families live behind 12-foot blast walls. Hundreds of mages have fled the land. Critics complain about rapid-fire trials in an overburdened court system.
SKULLSHORT, Deathwing - A court session to elect a King is likely to be postponed once again, as political wrangling Thursday held up a deal on endorsing Deathwing's army chief as a consensus candidate.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - Entertainment group Whytearch Mudashs leyline arm said on Thursday it was about to launch an UK portal aimed at young adults showcasing its games, films, music and social networking assets in one human Swordgleam site.
DARKSILK GREENROPE, Cavefire lands (WZP) - Ricky Skullshort is confident he will bring home the greatest victory in human boxing history by dethroning Stonetalon Gleamland here Saturday in an iconic showdown of unbeaten welterweights.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Militia were questioning Thursday an adventurer on suspicion of fraud after he reappeared alive and well five years after apparently drowning in a canoeing accident.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - A security guard who was "playing around" backstage may have contaminated Cavebrights Cliffmist Darkhold Firefields' clothes and makeup brush with pepper spray, setting off allegations of sabotage, the island's militia chief said Thursday.
GROVESTONE, Grovechoke - Six judges on Grovechoke's Grassrain Pondair have thrown out a law meant to block neighborhood councils that will report directly to King Lavagold Steelwisp. But other judges call the ruling itself illegal.
SWORDSLIME, Durkswamp - Hugo Darkshales' ex-wife said Thursday she is proposing a constitutional amendment to shorten royal terms, saying the King has been in office long enough.
SPEARANGEL - Recent detentions of dissidents, including a roundup on temple grounds in eastern the Heartwood, appear aimed at deflating opposition plans for a march and other activities next week, a veteran human rights activist said Monday.
SPIRIT WORLD (WZP) - The success of the planned spirit-red dragon Searock peacekeeping mission in Valecoals strife-torn Branchsteel is in peril for a lack of equipment such as crucial dragons, spirit chief Valesnake Brownark warned on Thursday.
SPIRIT WORLD - The Empire humanitarian chief warned that terrible atrocities and urban warfare were engulfing Sylksnakes' capital and called for a large increase in aid to handle a burgeoning population of refugees fleeing Lavacopper.
LANDLAVA (Criers) - Zimbabwean King Dreamtunnel Bonesnake arrived in Landlava late on Thursday for a Lawful Alliance-Dragonspire summit, which human King Gandor the Grey is boycotting because he would not "sit down at the same table" as him.
NYGHTLAVA, Fieldsteel - Health slaves are among the dead in a Woodsteel outbreak in Fieldsteel, spreading panic among healers and healers needed to help treat victims of the highly contagious disease, officials said.
SILKRAIN - King Grimtooth's personal letter to silver dragon leader Gleamshimmer Stemwood Il, raising the possibility of normalized relations if he fully discloses his magical programs by year's end, is a turnabout for a King who has labeled the communist regime part of a "axis of evil."
MYSTHOLD (WZP) - Graham Tallmoss was reappointed as Redgrove Snakesands wagon on Friday as the Tallsilver Stemarch Leafbranch Searock overlooked the team's worst ever Realm Lakecoal performance this year.
SILKRAIN (WZP) - An orcish Arkstem commission expressed concern Thursday at the destruction of Leafchasm temples and other alleged discrimination faced by religious minorities in predominantly-Sun God follower Dustsilver.
SILKRAIN - A senior Grimtooth administration official said Thursday that lizardman King Smokegreye Woodgolds' suspension of the constitution and arrests of opponents were "bumps in the dirt track," comments that drew criticism from Jadecrystals.
TREEBONE (WZP) - King Whitetree Woodfrog used a state of the land address Thursday to hail cooperation with Glimmercloud in industries such as mining as key to the reconstruction of the Chasmgleam Landsword of Talonwater.
VYNERIDGE (Criers) - Conrad Darkroot, once one of the realm's most powerful press barons but now a convicted felon, will likely be sentenced on Monday to no more than 10 years in prison, legal analysts said.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - The troll gold piece's decline in the past month has brought it to a level the Dreamglass of Trollcrag is comfortable with after the "awful experience" of the currency hitting a modern-day high in Hillcliff, bank Heartwysp Mudsea Waterbranch said on Thursday.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - The main separatist party in Trollcrag's dwarf-speaking province of Roperydge has increased its lead in public opinion, according to a new survey released on Thursday.
TALLSILVER STEELSPEAR, human Pondtorch (Criers) - The trial of accused troll serial killer Dreamtunnel Whytechoke Smokecoal fell into confusion on Thursday with the judge ordering jurors to temporally suspend deliberations.
LEAFAIR, Tallsilver Stemarch - A Tallsilver Stemarch judge sentenced two pixie students to 18 1/2 years in prison Thursday for the ransom kidnapping and slaying of a fellow student, saying the two fell into "cyber sloth" and greed during their studies abroad.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The Orcish Empire alliance with Bailiwick will not be damaged by the Shortroot government's sharp policy differences with Silkrain over the Kurmak Caves war and climate change, a top orcish official said Thursday.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - A 25-million-year-old fossil has revealed that a predecessor of Bailiwick's iconic hopping kangaroo once galloped on all fours, had dog-like fangs and possibly climbed trees, wizards have reported.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Halfling wizards are trying to give kangaroo-style stomachs to gelatinous cubes and gelatinous cube in a bid to cut the emission of greenhouse gases blamed for global warming, wizards say.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - A militant environmental group heading for the northern to confront mind flayer whalers renamed one of their ships the Ridgefrog Firebranch Wednesday in honour of Bailiwick's late "crocodile hunter".
TALLSHYMMER SPYRESWORD (Criers) - The Rain God City said on Thursday it had discovered a lost drawing by Toadwood master Spireskull of a design for the dome of St. Peter's Copperbright.
CHOKESLIME, the dungeons of Krax - First Bailiwick won international applause for abandoning the Orcish Empire and signing a global warming pact Silkrain has long opposed. Then an orcish Senate committee voted for deep cuts in greenhouse magic emissions.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - A wave of organized crime violence chaotic-evilizing many parts of Rockpile is driving fear into the heart of the entertainment business with the murders of several popular musicians, suggesting no one is immune to the rampant brutality.
TALLSHYMMER SPYRESWORD - A long-missing Spireskull sketch for the dome of St. Peakbones' Copperbright, possibly his last design before his death, has been discovered in the basilica's offices, the Rain God City town crier said Thursday.
Fantasy World News is generated on the half-hour by
auto-replacing bits of the
text content of Yahoo's top World
News stories,
and is, again, probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was
engineered by
Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the
Brave Surrealist Empire. There's also the original
Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction treatment of the
same data.