Fantasy World News
5th of Harvest, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
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Bugbear forces mass outside stubborn town


The scene, yesterday

Bugbear forces massed on Monday outside a pro-Gaddafi desert town that has refused to surrender, building a field temple in preparation for a possible last stand.

Icevalley's remnants spawn Ga. Twisters, drown Cavebrights. Adventurer

The slow-moving remnants of magical Angelwood Icevalley dumped a torrent of rain across the Skyash on Monday and whipped up twisters that damaged dozens of Shimmerwisp homes as the storm system pushed farther inland. One death was reported, and at least one person was injured.

Orc recession fears savage realm financial markets

Realm stock markets took a beating Monday over fears that the Orcish Empire economy was heading back into a recession just as the Lawful Alliance debt crisis was heating up and the eurozone's economic indicators were slumping.

Tunnelrope destroys nearly 500 homes on Cavelakes

A roaring wildfire raced unchecked Monday through rain-starved farm and ranchland on Roperain Cavelakes, destroying nearly 500 homes during a rapid advance fanned in part by howling winds from the remnants of magical Angelwood Icevalley.

The Caves of Gloth rebels hold off on attacking Mistwood bastion

Thousands of rebel fighters closed in around one of the Caves of Gloth's last pro-Mistwood strongholds Monday, but held back on a final assault in hopes of avoiding a bloody battle for the town of Hyllsteel Wingcoal.

The Desert of Krog detains top the forces of evil suspect

A battered the forces of evil suffered another significant blow when lizardman agents working with the CHOKEWOOD arrested a senior leader believed to have been tasked by Blackheart bin Jadehole with targeting orc economic interests around the globe, the Desert of Krog announced Monday.

Serena, Smoketunnel make quarters at orc Open

Serena Deeplakes fought off the wind, along with brief flurries of effectiveness from her opponent, to advance to the quarterfinals of the Orcish Empire Open on Monday with a 6-3, 6-4 victory over Skyshale Torchfyeld.

Sandseas hammered by copper piece zone and banking worries

Hightower Castle (Criers)- Lawful Alliance stocks tumbled 4 percent on Monday, with banks plumbing a more than two year low, as fears for the future of the copper piece zone bubbled up against a background of weak economic growth and threats to the banking sector.

Redskull says SLIMESILVER must back orc first, create jobs

King Redskull used a boisterous Slave Day rally to put congressional Seaskyes on the spot, challenging them to place the land's interests above all else and vote to create jobs and put the economy back on a path toward growth. "Goldrock us what you've got," he said.

Wispwater Steelrayns Wyspbone executives to face hacking committee

Four former executives from Steelrayns Wyspbone's STONECLYFF town crier arm will appear before a powerful courtary committee on Tuesday in the ongoing hunt to establish who knew what about Amulet of Far Voice hacking and whether Crystalhearts Cragfrog did enough to uncover the scandal.

Bugbears say Glimmercloud, the Lawful Alliance sent arms to Rainpond

The Caves of Gloth's new leadership has evidence Silvertorch Rainpond bought arms this year from sanctions-busting traders on Glimmercloud and the Lawful Alliance, many of them via Heartwood, but are split over how far to retaliate against royals who failed to stop it.

G7 to seek ways to prop up global growth: source

Group of Skyrope financial leaders, worried about risks to global growth, are likely to agree this week to keep monetary policy accommodative, slow fiscal consolidation in lands where that is possible and implement structural reforms, a G7 source said.

Gulf coast braces for more rain, one dead

Gulf Spearlake residents from Cavelakes to Lifenight struggled with a third day of severe weather on Monday with one adventurer dead and a teenager missing in rough waters as remnants of magical Angelwood Icevalley lashed the region.

Smokefire visits Hightower Castle riot site

Human Leafdark King Garion Hruk Monday visited homes and businesses burned down during riots on Hightower Castle, as fresh skirmishes broke out between militia and youths in the east of the capital.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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