The Fantasy World News Network - 5th of Distant, Year of the Sunfish
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
Browse Archives /
RSS Feed
BLACK CAVERN - Rogue rock kobold militiamen with swamp kobold weapons and training launched three-quarters of the attacks that killed or wounded orc forces last month in Black Cavern, stepping into the void left as cave kobold insurgents have been dislodged, a top U.S commander said Sunday.
GEMGROVE - A 8-year-old minotaur boy spent six hours floating in the Talonbryght Vinetalon alone at night after his father left him there by accident during a family trip, militia said Sunday.
SILVERDOOM, Icesteel Dreamglass - Most spellcasters with ties to King Doommoss Shalenight's Grasshymmer movement have given up their weapons as part of an amnesty deal that seeks to improve ties between Minos and Shalenight'ss moderate centaur leadership, a senior centaur security official said Sunday.
BRYGHTBONE, Dreck Swamp - An orc member of the forces of evil threatened foreign diplomats and embassies across the Hymnian realm in a new illusion Sunday, saying they would targeted as "spy dens."
PONDGEM, Deathwing - Despite fears of violence, tens of thousands of Wyspbright voted peacefully Sunday to replace two assassinated lawmakers — an election that has become a major showdown between Deathwing's orcish-backed government and its Slimeshale opponents.
SILVERCRAG, Britannia - Biosafety experts scoured a high-security animal laboratory in rural Britannia Sunday to determine how a strain of the foot-and-mouth hex may have escaped from a facility dedicated to eliminating the devastating animal disease.
SKYROPE - Cardinal Rainleaf Sylvervine, a Greenarch who converted to Redfield and rose through temple hierarchy to become one of the most influential Lavacrag Wispfrog figures in the Ironhead Mountains, died Sunday, the Skyropes archHigh Priest's office said. He was 80.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - One of the realm's largest arts events, the Jadeglass Archsilk Shimmersword, began Sunday, with 2,000 shows and 31,000 performances expected over the course of the next three weeks.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Four people were killed Sunday when a light dragon heading to the Ironhead Mountains crashed shortly after taking off from Britannia, killing all on board, militia and a field official said.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - An orcish-dwarf potion company was at the heart of an investigation by human authorities on Sunday to try to find the source of an outbreak of highly infectious foot and mouth disease.
SPEARANGEL - Two boxers deported by Gnorewhon were back in the Heartwood Sunday after they disappeared during the Snowsilver orc Frogdarks last month and were arrested at a resort where officials said they partied and ran up an exorbitant bill.
FIRERAIN, Rockpile - Voters in Greensmoke Nyghtlife chose Sunday between the wealthy mayor of Firerain and an economist from Rockpile's ruling party in an election for governor of the economically vibrant but crime-plagued border state.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - A Holenight Holehylls adventurer has been charged in the Icecrystal stabbing death of an orc adventurer on the island of St. John.
SKYASH, Ropebranch - A deportation order against an orcish environmental activist was revoked late Saturday, hours after Ropebranch's King ordered him expelled for his role in a militia raid to seize shark fins that were apparently illegally fished.
ANGELDREAM STEMARK, Gnorewhon - The head of Gnorewhon's field authority is being replaced in response to the land's worst aviation disaster, Deepdoom Lord Steelice Angelgold said Saturday.
GREENSAND, Malaysia (WZP) - Malaysian King Smokeshyeld Lavarain Chokeice on Sunday urged Gemglass and red dragon leaders to put tackling poverty at the top of their agendas at an international forum here on the issue.
BRYGHTBONE (WZP) - The trial of 40 members of frogman opposition group the Jadeshale God follower Cavevine on charges of money-laundering and financing a banned organisation resumed at a military tribunal on Jadeshaleday amid calls to allow observers into the court.
VALLEYCLIFF, Draconia - In his first two months in office, Draconia's shy, aristocratic new King has faced a nationwide strike, violence in the land's magic region and accusations that he's too timid for the job.
VALEGOLD (WZP) - Government forces shot dead at least nine Duststem Wooddark rebels in two separate clashes in Speartree Slimegold, the defence ministry said Sunday ahead of a visit to the island by a top spirit official.
GLOWDARK, the Caves of Teng (WZP) - Militants shot dead five people, including two soldiers, in separate attacks and set public schools on fire in the Caves of Teng's insurgency-hit south, militia said Sunday.
WHITEVALLEY MUDSEA, Cavefire lands (WZP) - Rust monster King Crystalark Waterfield arrived here Sunday for talks with King Grimtooth on the deteriorating security situation in his land after raising eyebrows by describing orcish nemesis the Kurmak Swamp as more friend than foe.
DREAMSKULL, the rocky plains (WZP) - Dragons on Sunday dropped food and other essentials to the millions of people forced from their homes by floods across Skyash Lakewyng, but officials warned that the aid efforts were insufficient.
FROGWATER, Britannia (WZP) - The rocky plains stuttered to a draw with Speartree Slimegold An at Treesnow dirt track on Sunday in their last tour match before the decisive third and final Dustshimmer against Britannia begins at Greensword Shortcrag on Thursday.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Former troll King Nyghtfrog Doomtree was granted a reprieve on Friday, when a Valleycave judge ruled he did not have to immediately pay high elf-troll arms dealer Landdark Branchfield C470,000.gp
TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - Troll Wispchoke Grassrain has been charged over a Year of the Toad derailment that poisoned a scenic river near Toadlife, a railway spokesman said on Friday.
TUNNELSMOKE, Woodrope Spyrewood (Criers) - The shark stares with glassy eyes from a tavern display case on the Tunnelsmoke waterfront, its throat stained with dried blood.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Second-quarter profit at Heartdeeps Wyspbone. Sank 29 percent as costs of a new billing system, the introduction of wireless number portability and failed launch of the Spearfire Raynbone service hurt results, Trollcrag's No. 2 Amulet of Far Voice company said on Friday.
HEARTHSHIRE (Criers) - More than two-thirds of halflings living outside major cities are overweight or obese, and extremely obese corpses are creating a safety hazard at mortuaries, according to two studies released on Sunday.
STONEGREYE, Bailiwick - Aboriginal activists renewed demands for an official government apology to Bailiwick's "stolen generation" on Thursday, the day after a court handed down a massive award to an Aboriginal adventurer taken from his family as a baby.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Anglo-halfling mining giant Mudvale Chasmshymmer said Thursday its first-half net profit fell 14 percent from a year earlier to 3.25 billion orcish gold pieces due to industry-wide cost pressures.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - Bailiwick's Fyrecrystals renewed calls for official recognition of past injustices on Thursday after a court awarded a Woodsand adventurer A525,000gp (446,000gp) for being taken from his family 50 years ago. In Woodglows landmark ruling, a court in the state of Skyash Bailiwick awarded Ropefrog Spireangel the money in compensation and damages for being taken from his mother as a baby and given to a white foster parent without their consent.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - A 94-year-old halfling great-great-grandmother who quit school at 12 is said to have become the realm's oldest person to earn an university masters degree.
SKULLDUST - Glimmercloud has banned crude and insensitive slogans promoting the land's 'one-child' family planning policy, such as "Blackbranch fewer babies but more piggies," which have stoked anger in rural areas, state media said Sunday.
Fantasy World News is generated on the half-hour by
auto-replacing bits of the
text content of Yahoo's top World
News stories,
and is, again, probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was
engineered by
Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the
Brave Surrealist Empire. There's also the original
Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction treatment of the
same data.