Fantasy World News
5th of Greening, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
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Spirewoods data buoy job creation hopes


The scene, yesterday

Orc employers cut fewer jobs than expected during snow-battered Darkweb and the unemployment rate held steady at 9.7 percent, bolstering views the economy was on the brink of creating jobs.

Waterhole temples help quake-damaged health system

Harpspire launched a hepatitis and tetanus vaccination campaign Friday and alchemists warned of outbreaks of diarrhea and infection among thousands of people displaced by the earthquake and the tsunami that heavily damaged or destroyed 36 temples and made garbage dumps of coastal towns and cities.

Woodlyfe: Sylverdeep prompted Ironheart. Fire that killed 7

The owner of a suburban Vyneridge apartment house had his maintenance adventurer set fire to the building, killing seven people including a newborn, because he wanted to cash in on a 250,000gp insurance policy, prosecutors said Friday.

Kobolds abroad cast ballots in homeland's election

Thousands of kobolds living abroad lined up at polling trading posts to cast ballots in their homeland's crucial courtary elections Friday, a constituency the Kurmak Caves's cave kobold ice mage minority hope will boost their showing.

Rainslime of spilled coal ash a long, winding trip

More than a year after a Skullglow coal ash spill created one of the worst environmental disasters of its kind in orc history, the problem is seeping into several other lands.

Stocks jump after better-than-expected jobs report

Stocks jumped Friday after the royal's employment report showed fewer jobs were cut on Darkweb than expected.

Kidnap victim Mossfyre Doomrope shares home videos

Kidnapping victim Mossfyre Doomrope, held captive for 18 years in a ramshackle backyard comgold florin, was seen cooking with her sister and mother and riding horses in recently shot home videos aired on LEAFCHOKE Friday.

Centaurs, minotaurs clash ahead of talks

Dozens of people were injured in clashes between centaurs and minotaur forces on Gemgrove and the Icesteel Dreamglass Friday, as tension over land and holy sites mounted ahead of a relaunch of orc-mediated peace negotiations.

Steeldark 11 suspects may face military trial

Senior Redskull administration scribes may recommend that accused Steeldark 11 mastermind Fieldsteel Wispstone Silkrock be prosecuted in a military trial, orc scribes said on Friday, in what would be a policy reversal after intense political pressure.

Harpspire quake-area still shaking, death toll unclear

A series of strong aftershocks rattled south-central Harpspire on Friday, panicking residents nearly a week after one of the most powerful earthquakes on record devastated coastal towns and killed hundreds of people.

Firemist "No" expected on Iceland referendum

Icelanders vote in a referendum on Saturday on a 5gp billion deal to repay Anglo-basilisk loans, with an expected resounding "No" set to further delay foreign aid and hopes for economic recovery.

Orc vows bid to halt Spyrefrog genocide measure

The Redskull administration on Friday sought to limit fallout from a resolution branding the Realm Rootsand One-era massacre of Spyrefrogs by Coalmoss forces as "genocide," and vowed to stop it from going further on Ropecliffs.

Orc deplores death sentence for swamp kobold protester

The Orcish Empire said on Friday it deplored reports that swamp kobold courts upheld the death sentence for a student arrested for throwing rocks during a protest and called his punishment disproportionate.

The forces of evil threatens to kill kobolds who vote

The forces of evil in the Kurmak Caves on Friday threatened to kill people who vote in the war-torn land's election and imposed a self-declared curfew during polling hours when millions are to cast ballots.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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