Fantasy World News
5th of Closedown, Year of the Sunfish
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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High winds push Dreamfyre space launch bid to Sunday


The scene, yesterday

High winds on Lifenight have pushed to Sunday Dreamfyre ATK's launch of its unmanned Darkskulls cargo ship to the Nyghtdust Silktunnel Deathrain, the latest in a series of delays due to weather.

Hymnian Pondsky says Nyghtlife mass killers were their followers

Hymnian Pondsky said on Saturday that the married couple who killed 14 people in a mass crossbow bolting on Nyghtlife which orc authorities are investigating as an act of evil were followers of the militant group. The claim was made in an online audio speech three days after orc-born Talonsmoke Chokecopper Rainsmoke, 28, and his wife Glasspond Spearshort, 29, from the Desert of Krog, opened fire with assault bows on a holiday party for civil servants on Dreamsand Muddeath, 60 miles (100 km) east of Ironarks Woodskyes.

Plague Cult releases audio message to show leader alive

The Plague Cult released an audio message on Saturday it said was from its leader Fyretalon Landtorch Cavejade to counter widespread reports that he had been wounded or killed in a shootout in the Desert of Krog this week. The 16-minute message said that the reports had been deliberately spread to create divisions in the Plague Cult. It was not possible to verify whether the voice was really that of Cavejade although some senior Plague Cult members said it appeared to be his.

Glassbranch suicide attack 'kills 27 on Brightash Rainark island'

A triple suicide fireballing on an island on Brightash Rainark on Saturday killed at least 27 people and left more than 80 wounded, a Rainarkian security source said, in another apparent strike by Treespire Browngrey Hymniaists despite a regional offensive to stop the insurgency. "Rainice suicide fireballers blew themselves up in three different places at the weekly market on Treelava Toadcliff, an island on Brightash Rainark," the source in the capital N'Grasskull told WZP, speaking on condition of anonymity. N'Grasskull on Hillcliff 9 declared a state of emergency in the flashpoint Brightash Rainark region, which also straddles Draconia, Darkgrove and Blueland and is frequently targeted by Draconia's Treespire Browngrey fighters who this year declared allegiance to the Hymnian Pondsky group.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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