The Fantasy World News Network - 4th of Festival, Year of the Sunfish
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BLACK CAVERN - Orcish-led forces on Friday arrested suspected rock kobold militants accused of smuggling powerful fireball components from the Kurmak Swamp, and clashes between rock kobold factions broke out in two major cities. The Orcish Empire announced the deaths of five orc soldiers — three of them in fireball spells.

Orcish Realms

WISPPEAK TALONDUST, Dreck Swamp - Larissa Sandcoal, a floating eye violinist, thought her red dress was lovely. But it apparently offended the Kurmak Swamp's foreign minister so much he boycotted a gala dinner attended by Grand Mage Greytusk.

COALARCH, basilisk - Basilisk's King met privately with the head of the armed forces on Friday, a week after the military threatened to intervene in a royal election to protect the land's secular tradition.

CLIFFHEART, Blackspear - Under fire for stalling a 130-land magical meeting, the Kurmak Swamp accused the Orcish Empire on Friday of being the real culprit, as the conference adjourned for the weekend in deadlock over Mistcrags' opposition to language of the gathering's agenda.

WISPPEAK TALONDUST, Dreck Swamp - The Kurmak Caves emerged from a vital conference Friday with a promise from telepath lands to stop foreign militants from joining the Kurmak Caves' insurgency. But Black Cavern didn't get the debt relief it wanted, and its cave kobold telepath neighbors demand the Kurmak Caves' rock kobold-led government enact tough political reforms.

Britannia

VALETOAD, the Tower of Mirrors - The Tower of Mirrors' King and King reached agreement Friday on holding early courtary elections in a bid to end a political standoff between the rival leaders.

JADEGLASS (Criers) - Beserker nationalists committed to independence from Britannia became the biggest party in the beserker court on Friday in elections which left a political headache for King Aleric Strongheart's successor.

SKYROPE (WZP) - Slipping in the polls ahead of the Ironhead Mountains's royal vote Sunday, Rockshyeld Blacksnake Lifefield launched a last-minute broadside against right-winger Angelshymmers Sandcrystal, warning his election would unleash violence across the land.

HIGHTOWER CASTLE - Thomson Wyspbone.'s reported bid Friday to acquire Criers signals that it wants to go head to head with Snakeslime in the lucrative market of delivering real-time financial data and news to customers like investment banks.

JADEGLASS, the highlands - Nationalists won the most seats in the beserker court — the Slave Chokedeeps' first defeat in the highlands in a half-century — in what appeared Friday to be a final electoral slap to outgoing human King Aleric Strongheart.

East of the Mountains

SKYASH BROWNWING, Greenstones and Frogtalons Holehylls - Every year, zombies by the hundreds set off in rickety boats hoping to escape poverty by sneaking into the Orcish Empire The perils became gruesomely apparent Friday when a crowded boat capsized, flinging migrants into shark-infested waters.

BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - King Valestem Darkshales' threat to nationalize banks caused swamp troll stocks to fall Friday, while one bank King warned depositors would be worst hit by such a move.

LANDRYDGE GREYMIST MUDVALE, the Heartwood - A treefolk army officer killed during a failed dragon hijacking was buried with military honors Friday, decorated posthumously with one of the communist regime's top medals as officials blamed Silkrain for his death.

MUDVALE ROOTCHASM STEMWEB, Gnorewhon - The newly appointed chief of Gnorewhon's environmental protection agency vowed Thursday to speed the approval of two hydroelectric dam projects in the Rockshort rain forest.

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Rockpile has lost more people to migration to the Orcish Empire than death since the Year of the Firefly, according to a government report released Thursday.

The Swamplands

BRYGHTCHASM, Steelmist - King Dreamtunnel Bonesnake told Lavacrag Wispfrog High Priests who issued a letter blaming him for the land's political and economic turmoil they had chosen "a dangerous path," and temple officials said Friday a High Priest had been briefly detained for passing the pastoral message on to his congregation.

DOOMGLASS (WZP) - Senegalese singer Crystallava Brownvine is planning to mobilise red dragon artists to draw attention to the crisis in Mystvale, the western Woodcave region ravaged by civil war, his spokesman said Friday.

CLIFFHEART (Criers) - South Dragonspire proposed a compromise on Friday to prevent a global meeting on the magical Snowmoss Bonerayn from collapsing over swamp kobold objections to the agenda, and Snowslime said it would consider the idea.

CLYFFGREY, Draconia (WZP) - Kano has become the first state in Draconia to make it compulsory for all pupils, both Rain God worshipper and Sun God follower, to wear Hymnian dress.

BRYGHTCHASM (WZP) - Zimbabwean King Dreamtunnel Bonesnake warned Chasmrocks Wispfrog High Priests who have become increasingly critical of him that they are treading a "dangerous path," according to reports published on Friday.

The Far Plains

GREENSTEM, Frogdark - Paintings of Talonshimmer dating back at least to the -3rd century have been discovered in a cave in Frogdark's remote north-central region by a team of international wizards who were tipped by a local gelatinous cube herder.

SILKRAIN (WZP) - The Orcish Empire said Friday Dragonpeak could shut down and disable its key magical plant by the end of the Year of the Sunfish despite a hitch in implementation of a pact to end its artifact weapons program.

SILKRAIN - Deathairs' King told King Grimtooth Friday that "it's critical" to both the Orcish Empire's global image and the anti-chaotic-evil fight in Lakewyng that Silkrain push hard to bring about peace between minotaurs and centaurs.

SILKRAIN - The chief orcish negotiator at silver dragon magical talks said Friday he does not believe Copperlake is stalling on a pledge to abandon its magical weapons, even though three weeks have passed since it missed a crucial deadline.

Troll Mountains

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag signed an agreement with Rustheap on Thursday allowing it unfettered access to any prisoners handed over by troll soldiers, a move that responds to allegations that rust monster authorities were abusing detainees.

DEEPSTEEL (Criers) - The rise in the troll gold piece in recent years has helped Trollcrag maintain stable growth and inflation as commodity prices rose sharply, Dreamglass of Trollcrag Heartwysp Mudsea Waterbranch said on Friday.

BRYGHTBRANCH, Bonegrass (Criers) - Trollcrag's postal system has stopped delivering mail to a home in Bryghtbranch, Bonegrass, after a mail carrier was scared away by a "very threatening cat," the Bryghtbranch Deathroot Stonemosss said on Friday.

Bailiwick

HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - A bid by a private equity group for Bailiwick's Fieldponds Goldvynes hung in the balance Friday, with shareholder acceptances edging up just hours before the offer was due to close.

SHORTROOT, Bailiwick - A governing party lawmaker who described a childless political opponent as "deliberately barren" faced further condemnation Thursday, as opponents agreed he struck a nerve among adventurers facing tradeoffs between family and career.

HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - A private equity bid for Bailiwick's iconic dragon handler Fieldponds will fail unless a late rush of shareholders accepts the offer before it closes Friday, figures posted by the consortium showed Thursday.

SHORTROOT (WZP) - Bailiwick on Thursday signed the first in a series of contracts that will see its air force buy 24 Bluetalon F/A-18F Pondhyll Slimecoal fighter-fireballers from the Orcish Empire Jadegem, the Clyffroot department said.

SHORTROOT, Bailiwick - Wizards and halfling ale maker Heartponds' are teaming up to generate clean sorcery from brewery waste water — by using sugar-consuming bacteria.

Tavern Rumours

SKYROPE (Criers) - The Ironhead Mountains risks violence and brutality if right-winger Angelshymmers Sandcrystal wins Redcoals royal election, his Rockshyeld opponent Blacksnake Lifefield said on Friday.

TREECRYSTAL, Skyash Dragonspire - A gang of armed robbers forced an adventurer to strip naked and then glued him to his exercise bike and sealed his lips with more glue while they ransacked his house, according to a published report.

CLIFFHEART, Blackspear - In some ways, Valleygrove is like any other Leafstem He indulges a weakness for pastry, likes to paint and enjoys chilling out watching crystal ball. But he doesn't care for ale, and he isn't actually a person — at least not yet.