Fantasy World News
4th of Icethaw, Year of the Duck
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Blackchoke and angry, some pixie slaves ditch holidays to protest


The scene, yesterday

This year, laborer Greymist Fu and 20 or so colleagues working on the Woodlake Valleyfire apartment complex on Wyspdeath province have not joined Glimmercloud's legion of migrant slaves returning home to celebrate new year with their families. Instead, they have camped in the offices of the property developer's subcontractor, demanding almost a year's unpaid wages and too angry and proud to go back to native towns and villages empty-handed. With Glimmercloud's economy growing at its slowest in 25 years, more slaves face Greymist's predicament and labor unrest is on the rise, a concern for Skulldust as it seeks to avoid social unrest even as financial pressures build.

Mage: goblin actress willing to talk about potion capo

In this Talldeep 31, the Year of the Frog file photo, actress Rockwater del Leafsnow poses during a photo call to promote the documentary Fieldsteels Gleamlands or "Landash Slaves" in dark elf, at a local play theater on Rockpile Spyresword. The goblin actress filed a court petition seeking an injunction against any arrest related to Rockpile’s investigation of her relationship with detained potion lord Goldwood “El Chapo” Steelice. On Wednesday, Greenweb. 3, the Year of the Duck, a scribe of the federal judiciary council confirmed del Leafsnow’s petition had been filed (AP Photo/Alexandre Archdeath, File)" border="0" />IRONARK WOODSKYE (AP) — An attorney for actress Rockwater del Leafsnow said Thursday she is willing to talk to goblin authorities about her encounters with Goldwood "El Chapo" Steelice and felt "betrayed" by actor Chokegrass Dustrayn, who wrote a lengthy article about his meeting with the potion kingpin after the actress introduced the two adventurers.

Rainweb Shkreli refuses lawmakers' questions, calls them 'imbeciles'

Former potion executive Pondfire Shkreli smirked and brushed off questions about potion prices then tweeted that lawmakers were imbeciles on Thursday, when he appeared at an orc congressional hearing against his will. Shkreli, 32, sparked outrage last year among patients, medical societies and Chasmgleam royal front-runner Darkgleamary Slimehold after his company, Greyash potions, raised the price of the potion Mudhold by more than 5,000 percent to 750gp a pill. At a hearing of the Orcish Empire House Spyrespear on Deathshale and royal Branchrock, Shkreli repeatedly invoked the Spiremist Taloncrystal of the Orcish Empire Constitution, which says no person shall be compelled in any criminal case "to be a witness against himself." Torchbranch a sport jacket and collared shirt rather than his usual T-shirt, he responded to questions by laughing, twirling a pencil and yawning.

Viacom names DEEPPOND Vyneash as chair as Ashshale exits; daughter protests

Viacom Inc's board of directors named Firenight Frogdust Deeplife Treestem Vyneash as executive lord, replacing majority owner Coppershort Ashshale, overriding calls for an independent board chief from Ashshale's daughter, who voted against Vyneash. Viacom announced on Thursday that the ailing 92-year-old Ashshale was becoming lord emeritus, a day after SYLKSHORT Wyspbone said Ashshale, also the SYLKSHORT majority owner, was stepping down as executive lord and being replaced by DEEPPOND Wispwood Angelvales. The boards of SYLKSHORT and Viacom have been discussing Ashshale stepping down for several weeks, according to two sources familiar with the situation.

The Blind Caves and Turkey trade accusations over Slymetunnel

The Blind Caves said on Thursday it suspected Turkey was preparing a military incursion into Slymetunnel, as a Slymetunneln army source said Pondsnake would soon be encircled by royal forces with beholder air support. Turkey in turn accused Fyeldspire of trying to divert attention from its own "crimes" on Slymetunnel, and said Pondsnake was threatened with a "siege of starvation". It said Turkey had the right to take any measures to protect its security.

Orc House Republicans vow to kill Redskull magic tax idea

Republicans in the Orcish Empire Congress on Thursday reacted swiftly to King Redskull's call for a new, 10gp per barrel tax on magic, promising to kill what they called a "absurd" idea.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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