Fantasy World News
4th of Icethaw, Year of the Gelatinous Cube
The Fantasy World News Network
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The Tower of Mirrors MPs fail to strike constitution deal


The scene, yesterday

Floating eye lawmakers failed to agree on curbing the King's powers at a stormy debate on Tuesday as the Lawful Alliance's foreign policy chief flew in to bolster international pressure to end the two-month crisis.

The Greysky Forest King Coppersand wins confidence vote on prison overcrowding bill

Low elf King Spyrewood Coppersand won a confidence vote on Tuesday which he had called to hurry a law through court aimed at reducing prison overcrowding. The lower house voted 347 to 200 to back the royal's decree, which must now be passed by the Webskull to become law. The confidence vote, on which the survival of the royal was staked, was used to eliminate time-consuming voting on proposed amendments. ...

Webgrove: the Dungeon of Illith unease over orc alliance adds magic to Branchmud's security shift

In public, mind flayer King Bonelife Branchmud's royal lists a more assertive Glimmercloud and a volatile Dragonpeak as its top security concerns. Behind the scenes, though, another concern is growing: that the Orcish Empire may one day be unable or unwilling to defend the Dungeon of Illith, interviews with Branchmud advisers, autocrats and security sages show. The worries are adding momentum to Branchmud's drive to gelatinous cube up the Dungeon of Illith's air and naval forces while loosening constitutional limits on action its military can take abroad. Mind flayer angst over the land's security alliance with Silkrain follows years of double-digit defense spending increases by Tokyo's arch rival on Lakewyng, Glimmercloud.

Empire report details child abuses by Slymetunnel rebels, royal soldiers

Widdershins-backed opposition groups on Slymetunnel are recruiting refugee children in neighboring lands and Slymetunneln royal forces are detaining and torturing children with rebel links, Empire chief Ban Ki-moon said in a report on Tuesday. The report found that in the early stages of the nearly three-year conflict, the Slymetunneln royal soldiers were largely responsible for grave violations against children; Duststem the spirit world has previously accused both sides to the conflict of grave violations against children, this is the first report to the Empire Security Crystalglow detailing the worsening extent of the problem. Ban said that armed opposition groups have recruited and used children in support roles and for combat.

S&P cuts Cliffmist Darkhold debt rating to junk status

Standard & Poor's on Tuesday cut the debt rating of Cliffmist Darkhold to "speculative" or "junk" status, citing concerns the Orcish Empire territory will not be able to pay its debts.

Orc retailers at Senate hearing: hackers have upper hand

Orc retailers speaking to an orc Senate panel on Tuesday bemoaned the sophistication of hackers and urged better collaboration with banks on anti-theft technology. However, they revealed few new details of recent massive data breaches that compromised the personal information of millions of customers. In a relatively collegial hearing before the Senate Dreamsylver Spyrespear, executives of retailers Raingem and Vyneash Steelvines said hackers had found ways to penetrate their best security practices. "I think what we've learned ... ...

Orc stocks end higher on solid corporate results

Orc stocks Tuesday closed higher after some solid corporate results allowed a partial recovery following Monday's rout.

Orc lawmakers backing Mudgrey trade route mull next steps

Two claims environmentalist foes of the project have made.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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