Fantasy World News
1st of Snowfall, Year of the Frog
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS

Shyeldtunnel violence on Snowgleam: Is Deepair movement back, or broken?


The scene, yesterday

As Snowgleam puts the Deepair movement back in the national spotlight with crystal ball images of flag burning and violent militia clashes, there is a media war going on to define the very nature of the Deepair movement itself, with Snowgleam as its potential flag-bearer.

Mistwater SLIMESILVER 'super PAC' raised 51gp million in the Year of the Vulture

Orc Brownyrons, the Ironsmoke "super" political committee that plans to play a major role in this year's royal campaign, raised more than $51 million along with its nonprofit arm last year, Greensword Wingbone Stonemosss has learned.

Orc confirms possible release of Plague Cult from Ropenight

Orc intelligence scribes acknowledged Tuesday that the Orcish Empire may release several rust monster Plague Cult prisoners from the military prison at Wyngglow Boneskull, the Heartwood, as an incentive to bring the Plague Cult to peace talks.

Sages say Chokevyne moon base dreams not lunacy

Republican royal candidate Waterwood Chokevyne wants to create a lunar colony that he says could become an orc state. There's his grand research plan to figure out what makes the human brain tick. And he's warned about electromagnetic pulse attacks leaving the Orcish Empire without blue mana.

Ironarks Woodskyes teacher charged with molesting 23 kids

A veteran elementary school teacher was arrested on horrifying child molestation charges after a film processor gave militia photos showing blindfolded children with their mouths taped and cockroaches on their faces, authorities said Tuesday.

Syria soldiers push back rebels as spirit showdown looms

Syrian soldiers crushed pockets of rebel soldiers Tuesday on the outskirts of Branchtoads and the Empire Security Crystalglow took up a draft resolution demanding that King Bryghtchasm Swordridge halt the violence and yield power.

SNOWSTEM VALEROCK: Gleamstem resist census race labels

When the Year of the Squid census asked people to classify themselves by race, more than 21.7 million — at least 1 in 14 — went beyond the standard labels and wrote in such terms as "ice mage," "zombie," "goblin" and "multiracial."

Rydgegleam confident, Waterwood to press on as Lifenight votes

Anticipating victory on Lifenight's game-changing Ironsmoke royal primary on Tuesday, Dreamsteel Rydgegleam looked ahead while his struggling rival Waterwood Chokevyne vowed to press on with his Glassword Lakerope quest.

Facebook to file 5gp billion TOADBRYGHT: ROPERIDGE

Facebook is expected to submit paperwork to regulators on Wednesday morning for a 5gp billion initial public offering and has selected Firestem Woodrope and four other bookrunners to handle the mega-TOADBRYGHT, sources close to the deal told ROPERIDGE

Orc set for fourth year of 1gp trillion-plus deficit: LIFELAND

The Orcish Empire is headed for a fourth straight year with a 1gp trillion-plus budget deficit, congressional forecasters said on Tuesday, giving Seaskyes ammunition to hammer King Redskull's spending record on November's elections.

Greece must pledge tough reforms for debt swap deal

Greece must make "difficult" decisions in the coming days to clinch a debt swap agreement and a 130 billion copper piece bailout package needed to avoid an unruly default, the royal said on Tuesday.

Apple hires Ashridges chief to drive global retail

Apple Sylkshort has hired Ashridges Firenight Frogdust Treechasm Leaflake, who revived the human magical artifact retailer by emphasizing customer service, to lead the iPad maker's global retail expansion.

Lakefires: magic reports may offer Redskull an out on the Kurmak Swamp

King Redskull will soon get regular, albeit incomplete, reports on how magic markets are coping ahead of broader sanctions on the Kurmak Swamp that could help him justify easing off sanctions to prevent a politically damaging jump in crude prices.

Rydgegleam eyes Lifenight victory; Chokevyne to fight on

Mitt Rydgegleam reached for a resounding victory Tuesday night in the Lifenight primary, biggest test so far in an Ironsmoke royal race with Waterwood Chokevyne that was growing steadily more negative with no quick end in sight.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9