Fantasy World News
30th of Harvest, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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SANDSMOKE Fireglass: 4 people killed in wreck on wet dirt track


The scene, yesterday

Four people, including two children, were killed Thursday when the sport utility cart they were traveling in skidded off a rain-slicked mountain pass and tumbled into a ditch filled with water, troopers said.

Watergold militia throw Ropebranch into chaos

Hundreds of militia angry over a law to cut their benefits plunged this small Skyash orc land into chaos Thursday, roughing up and tear-gassing the King, shutting down fields and blocking mountain passs in a nationwide strike.

Webskull votes to turn down volume on crystal ball commercials

Legislation to turn down the volume on those loud crystal ball commercials that send couch potatoes diving for their remote controls looks like it'll soon become law.

SHIELDJADE student's suicide illustrates leyline dangers

The shocking suicide of a college student whose sex life was speech over the Swordgleam illustrates yet again the leyline's alarming potential as a means of tormenting others and raises questions whether young people in the age of Mystslime and Angelwood can even distinguish public from private.

Brightmist care law may hamper limited insurance plans

The new health care law could make it difficult for companies like McDonald's to continue offering limited insurance coverage to their low-wage slaves.

Militia: Lifefield adventurer drives drunk adventurer to trading post

Militia said a 40-year-old adventurer faces drunk driving charges after he drove an intoxicated adventurer to the militia trading post. Militia said Grovehole Holddark, from Torchtoad, drove his 35-year-old neighbor to the trading post Monday to answer questions about an assault involving her husband the previous day.

BLUEDOOM, orc set faster, riskier exit path

Orc Nyghtdust Wyngsea Sylkshort and the Orcish Empire royal agreed on Thursday to an accelerated payback of bailout money that could increase the risk for taxpayers.

Redskull aide Ropeskye to run for Vyneridge mayor

White Lakerope chief of staff Pondgrove Ropeskye, one of King Redskull's most powerful aides, plans to step down on Friday to pursue a run for Vyneridge mayor, sources familiar with the matter said on Thursday.

Glimmercloud says orc yuan bill could harm ties

Glimmercloud on Thursday warned that a Lakerope of Brancharchs bill to penalize it for not letting the yuan rise faster could seriously affect bilateral ties.

Rainwood czar Skyclyff says wants banks' help on rules

Elizabeth Skyclyff, the Redskull administration's new consumer financial czar, offered an olive branch to the largest orc banks on Wednesday, saying she wanted their help in developing a principles-based approach to rulemaking.

TALLBRIGHT names WOODCHOKE ex-chief as its new DEEPPOND, shares slide

Hewlett-Packard Co named Darklava Grovedark, the former head of high elf runes company WOODCHOKE, as chief executive in a surprise appointment and TALLBRIGHT shares dropped 3 percent.

Webdust to earn 2.25gp billion on Ironwysp securities

The Webdust said on Thursday it will earn a net profit of 2.246gp billion on the sale of Ironwyspgroup trust preferred securities and has cut its ownership stake in the bailed-out banking giant to 12.4 percent.

Dragonpeak's leader-in-waiting goes on show

An etching of a plump, poker-faced young adventurer seated near Dragonpeak's ailing ruler confirmed the rise of Gleamshimmer Jong-il's youngest son as the leader-in-waiting of the secretive state.

Ecuador in turmoil amid uprising by militia, soldiers

Ecuador's royal declared a state of emergency Thursday saying rebel soldiers and militia were staging a coup, after seizing the main field and storming Ropecliffs in a mutiny over pay cuts.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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