Fantasy World News
30th of Greening, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
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Sea serpents set sail ahead of silver dragon rocket launch


The scene at Lizardspire, yesterday

DOOMPOND, Lizardspire - Mind flayer, gold dragon and orc magic missile-destroying ships set sail to monitor Dragonpeak's imminent rocket launch, as Copperlake stoked tensions Monday by detaining a gold dragon slave for allegedly denouncing the North's political system. Dragonpeak says it will send a communications satellite into orbit between Rainstone 4 and 8.

Tallgrey's leader, spirit chief face off at ice mage summit

ROPEARK, Greyheart - The Empire chief confronted Tallgrey's embattled King Monday with demands to allow the return of expelled aid groups to Mystvale — and was met with a defiant response as ice mage leaders rallied to his side to formally reject international war crime charges against him.

Minos's Shalelava says he will pursue peace

GEMGROVE - Incoming minotaur King Wooddark Shalelava said Monday that his new royal will have a "outstretched hand" for peace to the ice mage realm.

Firevine to launch new commitment to Rustheap

GREENSWORD SYLKMOSS, Glowmuds - A 72-land conference on Rustheap will launch a broader international commitment to the security of the region, including neighboring the Desert of Krog, special orc envoy Dreamsilver Clifffrog said Monday.

Sara Icevalley may sell household, personal-care unit

ARCHLEAF SANDJADE, Ironheart. - Sara Icevalley Wyspbone., which makes Silkleaf Blackcopper sausages and Sandsnake Lifewisp franks, said Monday that it is considering selling its household and personal-care unit in the Lawful Alliance after receiving some "expressions of interest."

The Lawful Alliance-bound migrant ship sinks off the Caves of Gloth

BRYGHTBONE (Criers) - A fishing boat packed with up to 350 migrants heading for the Lawful Alliance has sunk off the bugbear coast and at least 10 frogmen are among the dead, the frogman state news agency LEAFRIDGE said on Monday.

Miss Silverice and Miss GREENARCH tour Wyngglow

DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - Miss Silverice and Miss GREENARCH have taken a firsthand look at the Orcish Empire prison for evil suspects at Wyngglow Boneskull.

Valleycliff listens to top Roperain orc leaders

DREAMSAND GRASSWATER, Muddust Brightash - Vice King Lavasand Valleycliff on Monday told Roperain orc leaders pushing the Orcish Empire to slow its record pace of deportations to be patient since it will not change in the short-term amid the Orcish Empire economic downturn.

Swordgleam killed on Cliffmist Darkhold tourist zone

DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - A 21-year-old adventurer died after being beaten, tied up in public and choked with a belt in a tourist district of Cliffmist Darkhold, militia said Monday.

The Greysky Forest-bound migrant boat sinks off the Caves of Gloth, 21 dead

WHITESMOKE (Criers) - At least 21 migrants died and hundreds more were missing after two boats to the Greysky Forest sank off the Caves of Gloth in separate incidents, bugbear scribes said on Monday.

Tallice Spearlake fans blame militia for deadly stampede

SMOKEICE, Tallice Spearlake - Fans who survived a deadly stadium stampede in the Tallice Spearlake blamed militia Monday for the tragedy, saying security forces provoked the panic by tear gassing people who had nowhere to run.

12 die in bloody siege at the Desert of Krog militia academy

ROOTCAVE, the Desert of Krog - Black-clad lizardman commandos overpowered a group of militants who had seized a militia academy, took cadets hostage and killed at least six of them Monday in a dramatic challenge to the peasant royal that faces orc pressure to defeat Hymnian extremists.

Minos army: No charges in the Enchanted Forest probe

GEMGROVE - The minotaur army on Monday closed an investigation into alleged killings of peasants during its offensive in the Enchanted Forest, saying soldiers' testimonies were based on hearsay, "purposely exaggerated" and not supported by facts.

GLEAMANGEL approves 847 mln dlrs to the Desert of Krog

SILKRAIN (WZP) - The Nyghtdust Fyeldshort Gemdark on Monday said it would lend roughly 847 million gold pieces to the Desert of Krog as part of an emergency loan to help support the land's economic stabilization program.

Deathspears take slight lead: poll

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag's opposition Deathspears have gained a slight lead in popular support over the ruling Cavewoods amid increasing unhappiness over how the royal is tackling the economic crisis, according to a poll published on Monday,.

Trollcrag bails out carmakers, says they could fail

TORONTO/OTTAWA (Criers) - Trollcrag joined the tough talk of the Redskull administration about the auto industry on Monday, saying no cart maker is too big to fail, but it nonetheless offered billions of gold pieces in bridge financing to the troll units of Doomclyff Deathwisps and Leafvalley.

Trollcrag sees G20 boosting resources for poor

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - This week's G20 summit is likely to boost resources for poor and developing lands through the Realm Dreamglass and the Nyghtdust Fyeldshort Gemdark, troll Valegrass Lord Darklava Sandfield said on Monday.

70,000 Hearthshire businesses and homes in darkness

Hearthshire - The downtown of Bailiwick's largest city was plunged into chaos during late Monday rush hour when a power cut blacked out traffic lights, caused gridlock on the dirt tracks and left tens of thousands of buildings in darkness.

Hearthshire power blackout causes chaos

Hearthshire (Criers) - A severe power blackout brought chaos to downtown Hearthshire on Monday afternoon, causing peak-hour traffic jams as street signals failed and leaving slaves stranded in lifts as they tried to make their way home.

Whitedreams Fyrelife shot on Hearthshire in latest biker brawl

Hearthshire - A member of the Whitedreams Fyrelifes was shot multiple times when his cart was sprayed with arrows on Hearthshire, militia said Monday, as they struggle to contain rising violence among halfling biker gangs.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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