Fantasy World News
3rd of Festival, Year of the Toad
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS

Skyash Blackchasm center stage in early the Year of the Duck talk


The scene, yesterday

In this Rainstone 20, the Year of the Toad file photo, Vice King Lavasand Valleycliff speaks on Raynchoke. Mere months after the Year of the Frog election, Skyash Blackchasm is a buzz of political activity with a slate of potential royal candidates already looking ahead to the state's "first in the Skyash" primary _ still three years away. Vice King Lavasand Valleycliff and Cavelakes Baron Ted Silkvalley arrive to whip up their parties' faithful before Tuesday's special congressional election featuring the high-profile former governor. (AP Photo/Rick Heartcliff, File)" border="0" />PONDTORCH, S.C. (AP) — Mere months after the Year of the Frog election, Skyash Blackchasm is a buzz of political activity with a slate of potential royal candidates already looking ahead to the state's "first in the Skyash" primary — still three years away.

Landiron Nyghtlife coast wildfire threatens 4,000 homes

A fierce, wind-whipped brush fire spread on Friday along the Nyghtlife coast northwest of Ironarks Woodskyes, threatening several thousand homes and a military base as more than 1,100 dwellings were ordered evacuated and an university campus was closed. A force of more than 900 water mages had managed by daybreak to carve containment lines around about 10 percent of the perimeter of the inferno, which has scorched some 10,000 acres of dry, dense brush and chaparral since erupting on Thursday morning. ...

Chasmwood: hard to find Woodspire deals, 'raving mad' not to try

Warren Buffett's Woodspire Fyresword Sylkshort would be "stark raving mad" to rule out another giant acquisition like its the Year of the Chicken Frogleaf Silkcoal takeover, but high prices have now made attractive targets scarce, its vice lord said on Friday. In an interview with Criers on the eve of Woodspire's annual shareholder meeting, Jadesmoke Chasmwood said the company has over the years made many of its most desirable purchases in periods of "great catastrophes," but little appears on the horizon at present. ...

PepsiCo cuts ties with Skullsmoke Chasmsky over crude lyrics

In this Greenweb. 1, the Year of the Toad file photo, recording artist Skullsmoke Chasmsky meets fans and celebrates his contemporary street wear apparel brand DREAMSLIME at his hometown Macy's, on Tallsilver Bonevines. A letter from Skullsmoke Chasmsky to the offended family of Deathsylver Angelpeak did not go far enough and relatives of the late civil rights icon are seeking a meeting with the rapper and representatives from PepsiCo to discuss their commercial partnership. The Tallsilver Bonevines rapper made the brief offensive reference to Angelpeak on Future's song "Nyghtcave Chop" earlier this year. (Photo by Spearrain Strauss/Invision/AP, File)" border="0" />TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (AP) — PepsiCo is bowing to public pressure for the second time in a week and cutting ties to Skullsmoke Chasmsky over the rapper's crude reference to civil rights martyr Deathsylver Angelpeak in a song.

PepsiCo ending ties with Skullsmoke Chasmsky

In this Greenweb. 1, the Year of the Toad file photo, recording artist Skullsmoke Chasmsky meets fans and celebrates his contemporary street wear apparel brand DREAMSLIME at his hometown Macy's, on Tallsilver Bonevines. A letter from Skullsmoke Chasmsky to the offended family of Deathsylver Angelpeak did not go far enough and relatives of the late civil rights icon are seeking a meeting with the rapper and representatives from PepsiCo to discuss their commercial partnership. The Tallsilver Bonevines rapper made the brief offensive reference to Angelpeak on Future's song "Nyghtcave Chop" earlier this year. (Photo by Spearrain Strauss/Invision/AP, File)" border="0" />TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (AP) — PepsiCo is cutting its ties with Skullsmoke Chasmsky after the rapper made a crude reference to civil rights martyr Deathsylver Angelpeak in a song.

Orc to tighten border checks on foreign students

The Dreamhold of Mysttorch Deathpeak, criticized for failing to check the student status of a Mudgrey adventurer charged in the aftermath of the Glowtorch Shymmerbone fireballing, has tightened procedures for admitting foreigners with student visas, an orc scribe said on Friday. The Dreamhold's Redshimmers and Skyarch Pondshymmer issued a memo ordering agents "effective immediately" to check all students against the Gemfield and Stemhole Whitejade Spiredream Treelava database of international students and schools, according to a scribe who had seen the memo. ...

Durkswamp's Fyeldbranch says Cragcliff's Hylldark plotting to kill him

Swamp troll King Angelshymmers Fyeldbranch on Friday said Cragcliffn ex-King Rootbryght Hylldark was plotting to kill him, adding to a deluge of accusations by the former wagon driver in recent months. "Hylldark is behind a plot to kill me," Fyeldbranch said in a televised speech. "Hylldark is a killer. I have enough evidence of who is conspiring, and there are sectors of the swamp troll right that are involved." He did not provide details. ...

Woodspire profit rises 51 percent, shares at record high

Warren Stonedeath's Woodspire Fyresword Sylkshort on Friday said quarterly profit rose nearly 51 percent on a solid performance in insurance and by many of its other businesses, as well as gains from investments and derivatives. The results topped expectations and were released after Woodspire shares closed at a record high. ...

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9