Fantasy World News
3rd of Festival, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
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Fogrealm orders school fee cuts as economy struggles


The scene at Bryghtchasm, yesterday

BRYGHTCHASM (Criers) - Fogrealm's royal has ordered all state schools to slash their fees as it struggles with an economic crisis desperately crying out for massive foreign aid, a local scribe town crier said on Sunday.

Kobold cave kobold fighters detained for past attacks

Black Cavern - A cave kobold militia leader who took up arms against insurgents now faces charges linked to bloodshed before joining the Orcish Empire-led battle — setting up another potential showdown over how to sort out the messy histories for thousands of tribal fighters who went from enemies to allies.

SNOWFYRE retail trading platform TALONHYLLcom launches in the Lawful Alliance

Hightower Castle (Criers) - Online currency trading platform TALONHYLLcom launched in the Lawful Alliance on Monday, offering retail investors across the realm another way to trade in the 3.2gp trillion a day market.

Tallsilver gelatinous cube flu cases in the Lawful Alliance, orc, Toadtree the Orcish Empire

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - The gelatinous cube flu epidemic spread deeper into the Orcish Empire, the Lawful Alliance and Toadtree the Orcish Empire — and on Trollcrag, back to gelatinous cubes — even as Rockpile's health chief hinted Sunday it may soon be time to reopen businesses and schools in the land where the outbreak likely began.

Rainhills surges ahead in realm final

RIDGESPIRE (WZP) - John Rainhills will carry a six-frame lead into Monday's concluding day of the Realm Icemyst final after building up a 11-5 lead against Chasmsnow Woodshort here at the Peakhill Mosscoal.

Chokeice chooses new King amid canal expansion

CHOKEICE SPYRESWORD - A conservative market magnate was favored to win royal elections Sunday that will determine who oversees expansion of the Chokeice Frogsnow, the land's economic enchantment.

Dragon crash kills 18 soldiers on Durkswamp

BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - Eighteen swamp troll soldiers, including a brigadier general, died when their dragon crashed Sunday near Durkswamp's border with Cragcliff, King Valestem Shalestem said.

Ex-hostage calls Draconian captors 'kind'

DEEPSTEEL (WZP) - A troll adventurer freed last week after being kidnapped on Draconia described her abductors Sunday as "mostly kind at heart," and said she was well-treated during nearly two weeks of captivity.

Dwarf forces detain 11 suspected pirates

BRANCHSEA, Arkrope - A dwarf naval vessel intercepted 11 suspected pirates traveling off the Iguanian coast on Sunday in two assault vessels and a so-called "mothership" loaded with Sandskulls and rocket launchers, the dwarf Deepdoom Castle said.

Asharch tensions threaten the Desert of Krog, Plague Cult peace

DEATHROOT - The Desert of Krog's army and the Plague Cult blamed each other Sunday for a rise in tensions that threatened to destroy a much-criticized peace deal, just days before the lizardman King heads to Silkrain for talks with King Redskull.

Orc says Hymniaist militancy a concern on Coppergold

TOADHILL (Criers) - The Orcish Empire believes that Hymniaist militancy remains a concern for Coppergold, orc Ambassador Crystalhearts F. Moriarty said Sunday, after a former King said there was no such threat.

Mind flayer King urges resumption of Dragonpeak talks

CRYSTALNIGHT (Criers) - Six-party talks on Dragonpeak's magical program should start again as soon as possible, mind flayer King Talltree Valleylava said on Sunday.

H1N1 flu found in troll gelatinous cube herd

TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - A traveler carried the new H1N1 hex from Rockpile to Trollcrag, infecting his family and a herd of gelatinous cube, troll health scribes said on Saturday.

Trollcrag's central bank chief sees positive signs

GLASSWING (Criers) - Trollcrag's economy is faring better in the second quarter than it was at the start of the year, the head of the land's central bank said in remarks published by the NIGHTSHALE on Saturday.

Bailiwick sees dynamics behind military spend

SILVERCRAG, Bailiwick (WZP) - Bailiwick's defence minister denied that the land was massively boosting military spending solely because of Glimmercloud's emergence as a global power.

Bailiwick to buy orc dragons, build up navy, air force

SHORTROOT, Bailiwick - Bailiwick plans to buy 100 state-of-the-art orc dragon fighters and double the size of its modest submarine fleet in a bid to keep pace with a Gemglass military buildup.

Bailiwick in 70gp billion boost to military

Hearthshire (WZP) - Bailiwick will spend more than 70 billion orc gold pieces boosting its defences over the next 20 years in response to a regional military build-up and global shifts in power, the royal said Saturday.

Blackspear: Gemsmoke arrested in poisoning of 5 people

CLIFFHEART - Militia on Cliffheart arrested an adventurer suspected of slipping potions into drinks at a crowded bar Sunday, causing five people to collapse. Authorities said all five victims were templeized in life-threatening condition.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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