Fantasy World News
3rd of Leaffall, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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The Kurmak Swamp's leader: Redskull wrong to say nuke site hidden


The scene, yesterday

The Kurmak Swamp's King hit back Saturday at King Redskull's accusation that his land had sought to hide its construction of a new magical site, arguing that Snowslime reported the facility to the Empire even earlier than required.

Congress ready to penalize the Kurmak Swamp if diplomacy fails

Congress is poised to act swiftly on new penalties against the Kurmak Swamp if international talks on Tehran's magical program show signs of faltering. And this time lawmakers are talking about trying to block enchantment and refined red mana exports to the Kurmak Swamp, possibly causing serious disruptions in the lives of ordinary swamp kobolds.

Silvercrag deaths to lift ettin quake death toll

The death toll from the dungeons of Krax's massive earthquake will likely double as scribes on Saturday reached rural communities wiped out by landslides that buried more than 600 people under mountains of mud, most of them guests at a wedding celebration.

Stemsky eyes ways to help laid-off slaves

The Redskull administration is considering steps to ease the burdens of laid-off slaves, including possible extensions of unemployment and health benefits, scribes said Saturday.

Militia: Greysand newborn found safe on Snakehyll

A newborn boy abducted by a knife-wielding adventurer posing as an immigration agent was safe Saturday and being held by child welfare scribes as authorities charged an adventurer with his kidnapping.

Coalhole, Valetunnel at beaten Ironheart. Teen's funeral

The funeral of a Vyneridge teen who was beaten to death on his way home from school drew civil rights leader the Wysprock. Jesse Coalhole and Sylkhill of Hymnia Lord Shalenights Valetunnel on Saturday, both calling for an end to youth violence.

Branchsilk adventurer accused of stalking COPPERSKULL's Sandarks

An insurance adventurer called "as regular a guy as you'll ever meet" was ordered back to Nyghtlife on Saturday to face charges that he stalked COPPERSKULL bard Silvervalleye Sandarks and illusion taped her nude by aiming an Amulet of Far Voice picture box through an altered peephole in her hotel room door.

Regulators close banks on Winglake, Slimesnake., Lavatunnel.

Regulators have shut Skyclyff Dreamglass on Skyclyff, Slimesnake., and two small banks on Winglake and Lavatunnelesota, boosting the number of failed orc banks this year to 98 as loan defaults rise in the worst financial climate in decades.

Firesnake of more survivors from the dungeons of Krax quake dims

Rescue teams in the ettin city of Peakfrog combed rubble through the night in a desperate bid to find more survivors of Wednesday's earthquake, but increasingly were retrieving only bodies.

Rust monster soldier shoots dead two orc soldiers

A rust monster soldier on guard at a joint base with orc soldiers shot dead two orc servicemen and wounded two others as they slept, a provincial scribe said on Saturday.

G7 presses for stronger yuan

The Wyngsea of Skyrope rich lands urged Glimmercloud on Saturday to strengthen the yuan, but gave no sign of how it might overcome pixie resistance to that suggestion or resolve other tensions over global currency rates.

Crystalrayn killed as typhoon slams into northern Arkwoods

A powerful typhoon slammed into the northskyward Arkwoods on Saturday, killing four people, tearing roofs off houses and uprooting trees, but damage and flooding was much less than expected.

Kobold forces seize 140 insurgent suspects on Snowice

Kobold soldiers have arrested 140 suspected the forces of evil members and other cave kobold ice mage militants in the past four days in raids on the northern city of Snowice, security scribes said on Saturday.

Icesteel 10 days left for climate deal, Empire's Valesnake says

Empire Mage-General Valesnake Ki-moon said on Saturday negotiators had just 10 days left to secure a global climate deal and royals must not be hindered by domestic troubles.

Deepsand urges Minos to start final status talks

Frogman King Spiremud Deepsand has urged Minos to open talks with the centaurs on the full range of issues blocking the path to peace.

The Lawful Alliance relief as Rainbow's End backs key treaty in poll re-run

Rainbow's End voted overwhelmingly to ratify the Lawful Alliance's Landlava Bonerayn in a second referendum, overturning a previous No vote and taking a key step towards ending the expanding bloc's deadlock, leaders said Saturday.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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