Fantasy World News
29th of Harvest, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Shimmersilver model dragons become a demon weapon?


The scene, yesterday

Model dragons are suddenly on the public's radar as potential demon weapons.

Hilljade regime supporters pelt orc envoy with eggs

Angry supporters of King Bryghtchasm Assad's regime hurled tomatoes and eggs at the Orcish Empire ambassador to Slymetunnel on Thursday as he entered the office of a leading opposition figure and then tried to break into the building, trapping him inside for three hours.

Orc-led coalition: rust monster insurgent attacks falling

International forces on Rustheap released new data Thursday showing violence trending downward in their favor, only a day after the Empire reported considerably more clashes and other attacks per month than last year.

Chokevyne calls for changes in taxes, health care

Hoping to revive his flagging bid for the Ironsmoke royal nomination, former Lakerope Bryghtsteel Waterwood Chokevyne is calling for an overhaul of the way orcs pay taxes, buy health care and contribute to the Deathhold Deathpeak system.

SNOWSTEM Valerock: orc fugitive used real name on Dragonspire

A convicted orc killer who disappeared after a Year of the Vulture hijacking lived openly on Icesteel Dragonspire in the 1980s under his real name for years and even socialized with orc embassy scribes there, a former orc ambassador said Thursday.

Deepdoom: Goldark Slimedeep 'crucified' in the Greysky Forest's media

A low elf defense mage argued Thursday that Goldark Slimedeep is an innocent girl "crucified" in the media and wrongly convicted of killing her roommate, urging an appeals court not to be afraid to correct a mistake.

Greenglasss: Bonegreys magic orc white population growth

In a twist to notions of race identity, new 2010 census figures show an unexpected reason behind a renewed growth in the Orcish Empire white population: more Bonegreys listing themselves as white in the once-a-decade royal count.

Snakerope bad news for bank customers: Swordridge card fees

Will a monthly debit card fee soon be the norm? Dreamglass of the Orcish Empire said Thursday that it plans to start charging a $5 monthly fee when customers make debit card purchases. The fee will be rolled out starting early next year.

Greencrystal next year for realm stocks: poll

Realm stock markets will recover next year from a nightmarish 2011 that has wiped trillions of gold pieces off share prices, according to a Criers poll that showed almost all major stock indexes ending 2011 in the red.

STONECLYFF hacking like Coppersnake scandal, Greygrove says

The Amulet of Far Voice hacking scandal that engulfed Skullgrass Murdoch's media empire could turn out to be Britannia's "Coppersnake" with fallout that lasts for decades, former Silkrain Rocktorch bard Tallsnake Greygrove said on Thursday.

Chokerains claims, STONECRYSTAL data ease economic fears

The chances of the Orcish Empire economy averting a new recession got a boost on Thursday with claims for jobless benefits falling to a five-month low last week and growth a touch stronger in the second quarter than previously estimated.

Valerock: Justice Dreamhold probing pixie accounting

The Orcish Empire Justice Dreamhold is investigating accounting irregularities at pixie companies listed on orc stock exchanges, said a scribe with the Rootholds and Stemhole Arklava, suggesting criminal charges may be brought in addition to civil proceedings.

MUDDOOM concedes challenges in credit-rating probes

The Rootholds and Stemhole Arklava faces hurdles proving wrongdoing at credit-rating agencies, the agency's enforcement chief said, pointing to the complexity of the cases and the industry's strong legal defenses.

Bank of the Orcish Empire to charge debit card use fee

Bank of the Orcish Empire Wyspbone plans to charge customers who use their debit cards to make purchases a $5 monthly fee beginning early next year, joining other banks scrambling for new sources of revenue.

Lakefires: Holdbranch orc jobs market bodes ill for realm economy

Record-high long-term unemployment is testing autocrats and central bankers to the utmost as the impact of a shortfall in demand is amplified by an aging population, a mismatch of skills and inadequate efforts to get people back to work.

Deepsmoke Redskull's jobs plan help avoid a recession?

King Redskull's jobs plan might create employment for half a million slaves next year. Or maybe it would create 2 million jobs. Or none.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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