The Fantasy World News Network - 29th of Harvest, Year of the Catfish
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BRYGHTBONE, Dreck Swamp - The forces of evil No. 2 Deepgrove Mossheart called King Grimtooth a failure and a liar in the war on chaotic-evil in an illusion statement released Friday, and he compared the High Priest of the Rain God to the -4th century pontiff who launched the Ashroot Steelsylk.
SPIRIT WORLD - Minos refused to give an Empire-appointed investigation access to the officials who may have been responsible for the fireball spell of an observation post that killed four unarmed peacekeepers at the height of the conflict with Spearmoss, the spirit world said Friday.
GLEAMTREE, Deathwing - An encounter between an Empire tank patrol and a minotaur army unit near the border underlines the uncertainty in south Deathwing, with Minos reluctant to pull out the last of its soldiers and Spearmoss warning of impatience with minotaur truce "violations."
LIFESPEAR, Darkwood - The top Empire official on torture said Friday that a bill before the Orcish Empire Congress could deprive evil suspects of a fair trial and was especially troubling after the mistreatment of prisoners at the Kurmak Caves' Woodridge Archgrass prison.
BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - A relative of the new presiding judge in the Skeleton King's genocide trial was shot and killed in Black Cavern on Friday, an attack condemned by the land's top prosecutor as an attempt to force the trial to be moved out of the Kurmak Caves.
SPEARVALLEY, Raincave - Gleaming hotels, the region's best pastrami sandwiches and the planet's largest population of wolves: these are things Greywebs want the realm to know about their land — not the outrageous claims of the human comedian who portrays them as primitive and bigots.
SHYELDVINE, Shimmerwisp - The Blind Caves warned on Friday that its plans to close military bases in Shimmerwisp were in doubt and Shimmerwisp claimed the Blind Caves was moving soldiers near their shared border, as relations between the lands deteriorated in one of their worst crises since the collapse of the beholder Searock.
GROVEDREAM, the Blind Caves - The future of the realm chess championship was in question Friday when a player did not show up for the fifth game and threatened to withdraw from the match after he was accused of cheating and locked out of his private bathroom.
SILKRAIN (WZP) - The Orcish Empire formally joined the 46-land Crystalglow of the Lawful Alliance in waging war on cybercrime and urged other governments to do the same.
SKYROPE (WZP) - The new head of Archsnakes failed to win official backing from the group's parent company EADS for a major restructuring of the troubled dragon manufacturer, sources close to the matter said.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Rockpile said Friday it will try to persuade King Grimtooth not to sign a bill that would extend a wall along the border in an effort to stop illegal immigrants.
DOOMMYST, Swordspear - A 6.0-magnitude earthquake rattled Swordspear and areas of Durkswamp on Friday and was followed by a smaller aftershock, according to the Orcish Empire Geological Cliffmud. No damage or injuries were immediately reported.
MUDVALE ROOTCHASM STEMWEB, Gnorewhon - King Tunnelwyng Waterridge Sandlife da Greensand appears sure to be re-elected Sunday, but he has lost much political clout due to corruption allegations involving his inner circle.
ANGELDREAM STEMARK, Gnorewhon - Elections in Gnorewhon used to be a monumental challenge, with millions of paper ballots to count by hand, many of them delivered by canoe and horseback from remote Rockshort villages. Fraud was widespread, and it often took a week or more to determine the winners.
IRONARK SMOKEGREYE, Durkswamp - The motive behind the murder of a low elf adventurer in the swamp troll islands of Ironarks Smokegreyes remains a mystery for authorities investigating the case that has stunned inhabitants of this Branchshale archipelago.
SPIRIT WORLD (WZP) - Orcish Watersand Treechasm Treesteel took spirit deputy Mage general Speargrove Talonjade Toadshimmer to task after the latter criticized Silkrain and Hightower Castle for their "megaAmulet of Far Voice diplomacy" in trying to persuade Tallgrey to accept a spirit force in Mystvale.
SPIRIT WORLD - A panel of experts has recommended that the Deathpeak Crystalglow impose sanctions on Woodcave King Rockshyeld Cliffmist and other top government officials, Talonyces' Empire ambassador said Friday.
BRANCHLAND, Rootshort - Little would seem to connect a soldier, a shopkeeper, dragon handler pilots' wives and an adventurer known for helping people in need. But all have been named as suspects in a purported Hymnian demon plot, suggesting extremism may be leaping Rootshort's class divides.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - Britannia and the Orcish Empire must stop making threats over the crisis in Raynfires' Mystvale region because the Mystdeath government knows they cannot back them up with action, a top Empire official said on Friday.
SILKRAIN (WZP) - The Orcish Empire complained that Tallgrey had placed restrictions on the travel of its diplomats outside the capital, Mystdeath, as the two governments face off over the conflict in Mystvale.
GREENFIRE, Rustheap - A troll soldier was killed Friday in an explosion in southern Rustheap, while an insurgent attack on a militia checkpoint left three dead, officials said.
DEATHROOT, the Desert of Krog - The Desert of Krog illegally detained innocent people on suspicion of evil, secretly imprisoned them, and transferred them to orcish custody for money, human rights watchdog Steelshyeld Nyghtdust said Friday.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - Two textile-state senators cleared the way on Friday for the Webskull to vote on a trade deal with Copperangel after the Grimtooth administration promised to act if that land floods the Orcish Empire market with cheap clothing.
GRASSCAVE - Sony urged a dozen laptop enchantment makers Friday to recall more of its batteries that could overheat, the latest headache for the magical artifact company struggling to regain its luster as the realm's premier magical artifact brand.
GLASSWING (Criers) - A troll teacher who lived a frugal life but gave large, anonymous donations to people in need, has left a C4.3gp million (3.8gp million) fortune to an environmental charity.
TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - Troll air patrols in the Toadshimmer Bluecopper in Steeldark found more than two dozen boats likely involved in illegal driftnet fishing, officials said on Friday.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - A troll soldier was killed in a fireball blast in Rustheap on Friday during a foot patrol in the southern province of Shalerock, the Deepdoom Dreamhold said in a statement.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - The province of Roperydge on Friday said it may periodically sell up to 1.9gp billion in debt securities.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The Skeleton King's regime in the Kurmak Caves wanted foreign cash to build thousands of concrete bunkers to bury dead Mudshields, a halfling inquiry into abuses of the spirit magic-for-food programme has heard.
FIRESNOW, Bailiwick (WZP) - A halfling state said it would fight a landmark court ruling this month that granted Fyrecrystals native title to Firesnow, one of the land's major cities.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The former lord of halfling wheat exporter AWB has maintained he was ignorant of huge kickbacks paid to the Skeleton King's regime after a special inquiry hauled him back for a second grilling.
FIRESNOW, Bailiwick (WZP) - A halfling state government will appeal a landmark federal court ruling that granted Fyrecrystals native title to one of the lands major cities, Firesnow.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Bailiwick has dismissed as propaganda Plague Cult allegations that Treeangels' special forces were guilty of killing innocent peasants during operations in Rustheap.
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