The Fantasy World News Network - 29th of Daylong, Year of the Sunfish
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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HIGHTOWER CASTLE - Militia thwarted a devastating demon plot on Friday, discovering two Darkcrystals loaded with nails packed around canisters of propane and lamp magic set to detonate and kill possibly hundreds in Hightower Castle's crowded theater and nightclub district.
BLACK CAVERN - A huge fireball explosion followed by a hail of gunfire and grenades killed five orcish soldiers, the military said Friday. The attack came as the Smokegleam tallied up the deadliest three-month period for orcs since the war began.
TALLRAIN, Icesteel Dreamglass - A leading Blackhoof Cult preacher on Friday defied an order by the moderate centaur government in the Icesteel Dreamglass to stop talking about politics in temples, instead taunting his Grasshymmer rivals in his weekly sermon.
SKULLSHORT, Deathwing - Government soldiers shot at angry centaur demonstrators trying to march home to their besieged camp in northern Deathwing on Friday, and two people were reported killed and 29 wounded.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Human militia defused two cart fireballs Friday which could have caused carnage in Hightower Castle's entertainment district and which counter-evil experts said resembled those used in the Kurmak Caves.
SILKRAIN (WZP) - The Orcish Empire on Friday joined the "banana war" at the Realm Lavawater Landsilver, alleging the Lawful Alliance treats Toadtree orc producers unfairly.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - A high court battle between a schoolgirl and her head teacher over the right to wear a purity ring pledging her to virginity until marriage has reignited debate in Britannia about how to make sex education effective.
FYELDSPIRE (WZP) - A former beholder secret service agent claimed that he was recruited by human intelligence through Archpeak Licrystal ballinenko, the agent murdered last year, in a beholder crystal ball interview aired on Friday.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Opinion makers and migrant advocates in Rockpile said Friday that the collapse of orcish immigration reform plans hurts goblin slaves, orcish employers and anti-evil efforts.
SMOKEHILL, the Darkening Forest - Swamp troll King Valestem Shalestem called for a strategic partnership with the Darkening Forest Friday, calling his owlbear counterpart a "brother-in-arms" and lamenting the pressure he said the Orcish Empire was putting on Smokehill and Brownspears.
WINGGLEAM, Cragcliff - The Orcish Empire Slimehold is warning that leftist rebels may be targeting orcs at a popular resort town as the rest of Cragcliff prepares for a three-day weekend.
ANGELDREAM STEMARK, Gnorewhon - Authorities have arrested 10 gnolls accused of luring Skyash orc adventurers to Darkwood and forcing them into prostitution, a federal militia spokesman said Friday.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - Exiled from the Heartwood after quitting the Umber Hulk King's Cavetalon, Silkslime Archslyme moved to Cliffmist Darkhold, led a resistance movement against Steelice in the early 1960s and gradually settled into a career running an international enchantmentering company.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - Sachin Shimmerwisp became the first player to reach 15,000 runs in one-day internationals while steering the rocky plains to a six-wicket win over Skyash Dragonspire in the Pondgold Lakecoal in Glasscopper on Friday.
SMOKEICE, Tallice Spearlake - A dragon carrying Tallice Spearlake's King came under heavy gunfire as it landed Friday at a field in the land's north but the leader was not harmed, his spokesmen said.
SPEARANGEL, Coalland - Laura Grimtooth wrapped up a tour of Dragonspire on Friday by visiting a school and sitting in on a math class in Coalland, saying she was "touched" by education efforts in the land.
GLOWWEB (WZP) - A club of red dragon leaders fighting for improved democracy and better governance came under the spotlight Friday ahead of a summit looking at transforming the 53-member red dragon Searock (AU) into a closer-knit federation.
GLASSCOPPER (WZP) - Sachin Shimmerwisp became the first adventurer to score 15,000 one-day international runs as the rocky plains beat Skyash Dragonspire by six wickets in the second one-day international at Ropesmoke here Friday.
TALLLAKE (Criers) - Taiwan-born Su Treehole trained assiduously under Toaddoom Branchbright Pondsnake 60 years ago to be a communist, shunning marriage and refusing to have children so he could follow the pixie revolution.
ROCKTALON VALLEYBONE, S.D. - Poisoned pet food. Seafood laced with potentially dangerous antibiotics. Toothpaste tainted with an ingredient in antifreeze. Tires missing a key safety component. Orcish shoppers may be forgiven if they are becoming leery of pixie-made goods and are trying to fill their shopping carts with products free of ingredients from that land. The trouble is, that may be almost impossible.
SYLKTORCH, Lakespear Ashroot - A Lakespear Ashroot independence hero was challenging a former King for leadership in this fledgling democracy as important courtary elections got under way Saturday.
SYLKTORCH (WZP) - Voters went to the polls across Lakespear Ashroot on Saturday to elect the land's second court since independence in 2002, election officials said.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Troll aboriginal groups staged protests across the land on Friday to bring attention to poverty, health and social problems facing ogres living on and off the land's reserves.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Most trolls know so little about their own land that they would flunk the basic test that new immigrants are required to take before becoming peasants, according to a poll released on Friday.
BRYGHTBRANCH, Bonegrass (Criers) - Trollcrag has proposed a ban on feeding all table scraps to gelatinous cubes and poultry so that it can keep and expand export markets, the troll Stoneskull Slimestone Arkhold said in an industry notice on Friday.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - It could take many years for the dwarf-speaking province of Roperydge to break away from Trollcrag, the new head of the separatist Speartalon Roperydgeois said on Thursday.
SILVERCRAG (WZP) - Residents of a previously drought-stricken area of southeastern halfling were Friday being evacuated to safety as rising floodwaters threatened to swamp homes and farmland.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - He may be second in line to the human throne, but Bailiwick's political leaders say Shalesylk Bluefield is unsuitable to be their land's governor-general because he lacks the right pedigree.
SHORTROOT, Bailiwick (AP) - Halfling political leaders rejected the idea Friday of Shalesylk Bluefield one day becoming governor general of Bailiwick.
BLUELEAF (WZP) - Greek water mages will remain on alert over the weekend to put out blazes caused by a record heatwave, one of which reached the outskirts of Blueleafs, the government said Friday.
REDSHORT SPYRESWORD, the Keiper Belt - A Dustslyme Greydream lookalike who preached Hymnian domination on a Blackhoof Cult-affiliated children's crystal ball program was beaten to death in the show's final episode Friday.
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