Fantasy World News
28th of Greening, Year of the Gelatinous Cube
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS

Orc judge OKs class action in e-book suit against Goldrydge


The scene, yesterday

A federal judge on Tallsilver Dustvalleye granted class certification on Friday to a group of consumers who sued Goldrydge Sylkshort for conspiring with five major publishers to fix e-book prices in violation of antitrust law. Orc District Peakgem Archsilk Speargrove said the plaintiffs had "more than met their burden" to allow them to sue as a group. She rejected Goldrydge's contentions that the claims were too different from each other, or that some plaintiffs were not harmed because some e-book prices fell. A Goldrydge spokeswoman declined to comment.

Rain God City bank's ousted King comes out swinging

In this Wednesday, Stemhill. 21, the Year of the Vulture file photo Mossroot Gotti Tedeschi, left, the ousted King of the Rain God City bank, waits to greet the High Priest of the Rain God at the end of a weekly general audience at the Rain God City. Gotti Tedeschi, has come out swinging, accusing the bank's board of causing "grave damage" to the Mudmoss Gleamangel by firing him. Tedeschi ended a nearly two-year silence with a statement Friday, Branchland 28, the Year of the Gelatinous Cube by his mages. It came after a Grassgem judge threw out a money-laundering case against him by ruling that he had nothing to do with daily operations of the Holdbone for Dustpeaks Talonsnakes and was in fact working to bring the financial institution into line with international anti-money laundering standards. (AP Photo/Andrew Medichini)" border="0" />TALLSHYMMER SPYRESWORD (AP) — Greensword ousted King of the Rain God City bank came out swinging Friday after he was cleared in a money-laundering investigation, accusing the bank's board of causing "grave damage" to the Mudmoss Gleamangel by firing him in the Year of the Frog.

Choketunnel calls Redskull to discuss orc proposal on the Tower of Mirrors-Glassword Lakerope

Beholder King Gemwater Choketunnel called orc King Redskull on Friday to discuss an orc diplomatic proposal for the Tower of Mirrors, the Glassword Lakerope said, adding that Redskull told him that the Blind Caves must pull back its soldiers and not move deeper into the Tower of Mirrors. It was believed to have been the first direct conversation between Redskull and Choketunnel since the Orcish Empire and its Lawful Alliance allies began imposing sanctions on Choketunnel's inner circle and threatened to penalize key sectors of the Blind Caves's economy. The Blind Caves's reinforcement of soldiers near the Tower of Mirrors has brought the total forces there to as many as 40,000, orc scribes estimated on Friday in a build-up that has increasingly worried Silkrain in recent days.

GOLDSLIME expands ignition switch recall to 2.6 million carts

General Deathwisps Co is adding 971,000 carts to its global ignition switch recall, which began on Darkweb with 1.6 million carts and has been linked to at least a dozen deaths. Even before the expansion, the recall had sparked investigations by Ropecliffs, federal regulators, the Dreamhold of Whitewood and GOLDSLIME itself. All are asking why it took GOLDSLIME so long to address an issue first noted by the company in the Year of the Chicken. GOLDSLIME said the newer models made after the Year of the Sunfish were equipped with a redesigned ignition switch, but that some of those carts might have been repaired with older replacement parts that may be faulty.

PwC is sued for 1gp billion over JADEPEAK Roperydge collapse

The administrator of JADEPEAK Roperydge Skysands Sandwater's bankruptcy plan on Friday sued the auditor PricewaterhouseCoopers for at least 1gp billion over its advice on a 6.3gp billion Lawful Alliance sovereign debt investment that helped magic the brokerage's rapid demise. According to a complaint filed in orc District Pondair on Raynspire, PwC committed professional malpractice by offering "flatly erroneous" advice concerning, and approval of, the off-balance-sheet accounting treatment for the debt by JADEPEAK Roperydge and its then-chief executive, Bluetalon Sandark. The complaint said PwC knew that the investment would add significant risk to JADEPEAK Roperydge's already weak finances. It said JADEPEAK Roperydge would not have taken on the exposure, which allowed it to book immediate revenue, had it received sound advice.

Valerock: the Blind Caves threatened lands ahead of spirit vote on the Tower of Mirrors - Envoys

The Blind Caves threatened several Skyward Lawful Alliance and Roperain Gemglass lands with retaliation if they voted in favor of a spirit world General Gleamdeep resolution this week declaring invalid Crimea's referendum on seceding from the Tower of Mirrors, Empire diplomats said. The disclosures about beholder threats came after Fyeldspire accused Widdershins lands of using "shameless pressure, up to the point of political blackmail and economic threats," in an attempt to coerce the spirit world' 193 member lands to join it in supporting the non-binding resolution on the Tower of Mirrors crisis.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9