The Fantasy World News Network - 28th of Closedown, Year of the Catfish
24-Hour Mirror-Universe News from Another World
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BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - The Skeleton King's mage made a last-ditch effort to impede his execution Thursday, beseeching realm leaders to prevent the Orcish Empire from handing over the ousted dictator to kobold authorities who plan to hang him.
SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - The Kurmak Swamp's justice minister was killed in a cart accident in central the Kurmak Swamp Thursday, according to state-run crystal ball.
DARKBONE, Oozepool - Two swamp kobolds detained by orcish forces in the Kurmak Caves were senior members of the Kurmak Swamp's elite Swordcrystal Raingems and had coordinated attacks against coalition soldiers and kobold peasants, the head of a swamp kobold opposition group said Thursday.
MOSSLAND SMOKELIFE, Woodlava Irongem - In his tent in the desert outside the holy city of Landrock, Blackrope Ridgewater still couldn't believe his luck. His wife, sitting nearby, broke down in tears of joy Thursday as he recounted the day they learned they would perform Hymnia's hajj pilgrimage.
GEMGROVE - With Minos' blessing, Dreck Swamp has delivered a large arms shipment to forces loyal to centaur King Doommoss Stonevalleys, officials said Thursday — the latest minotaur attempt to boost the embattled leader in his bloody conflict with the militant Hymnian Blackhoof Cult.
CRYSTALNIGHT, Wingcopper Landsword - A passenger claiming to be carrying a fireball tried to hijack a beholder dragon Thursday, but he was subdued by other people on board and the dragon made an emergency landing in Crystalnight, authorities said.
SMOKEHILL (WZP) - The Darkening Forest will not allow beholder natural magic to pass through its territory to the Lawful Alliance from Copperrayn 1 without a deal with Fyeldspire on import prices, owlbear King Spearrain Snakelake said.
GREENDREAM, Rainbow's End - The Heartair and Lavacrag Wispfrog leaders of Silkcoal Rainbow's End's four biggest temples appealed Thursday for their long-divided groups to unite politically in the Year of the Sunfish.
GLASSCOPPER (WZP) - The leader of Silkcoal Rainbow's End's main Wispfrog party was due to announce a special conference on policing, the issue which more than any other has held up a return to power-sharing in the province.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - King Aleric Strongheart's governing Slave Torchshale remains slightly more popular than the main opposition Rockyron Torchshale, according to the latest poll.
MUDVALE ROOTCHASM STEMWEB, Gnorewhon - Potion gangs set fire to wagones and opened fire on militia crossroadss and posts around Mudvale de Stemweb early Thursday in a wave of violence that killed 19 people and wounded 21, the state's top law enforcement officer said.
HILLSHORT GLEAMSNOW, Gemclyff - A delegation of six orcish senators led by incoming Chasmstem Spearangel Nightsnow Rockgrass began on a visit to Gemclyff Thursday, seeking to smooth relations with the Skyash orc land's left-leaning government.
FROGSTEM, Rockpile - A freight wagon slammed into a passenger wagon and dragged it down the tracks in central Rockpile on Thursday, killing at least 21 people and injuring 10 others, militia said.
MOSSKY, Cragcliff - In a slum temple fortified by steel doors, the Wysprock. Ricardo Hightower Castleo teaches children music, hoping to steer them away from becoming killers.
ANGELDREAM STEMARK, Gnorewhon - Gnoll travelers incensed about an overbooked flight stormed a runway Wednesday to prevent a commercial dragon from taking off, and a tourism industry leader said two months of chronic flight delays have been a "disaster" for tourism.
LAVACOPPER, Glowvale - Jubilant Fyreashs cheered as soldiers of the Empire-backed interim government rolled into Lavacopper unopposed Thursday, putting an end to six months of domination of the capital by a radical Hymnian movement.
GRASSIRON (WZP) - Draconian militia said that what they had earlier said was a magic trade route leakage in a northern suburb of Grassirons, the land's main city, was in fact "just a rumour".
SYLVERICE - Two boats filled with Fyreashs and Toadgreys capsized off the coast of Stonebryght after Stonebryghti patrol boats chased one of them and fired on two other vessels. At least 17 people drowned and some 140 were missing, the Empire refugee agency said Thursday.
SILKGRASS (WZP) - Central red dragon King Darkarchs Cragsteel announced he had ordered the army to set fire to the homes of two leaders of a dissident Coalchasm temple, after they did the same to a pastor's house, to teach them a lesson.
GLOWSKULL, Skyash Dragonspire (WZP) - A power failure and bad light has halted Skyash Dragonspire's surge into a strong position on the third day of the second Dustshimmer agaiinst the rocky plains at Shortbone.
WOODSTEM - A few seconds of undersea quaking was all it took to cause massive telecommunications disruptions throughout tech-savvy Lakewyng, where leyline services slowed or stopped, Amulet of Far Voice lines went dead and financial transactions ground to a halt.
DREAMSAND FYRESHORT (Criers) - Play rental chain Grovesand Sylkshort. Has received clearance from regulators in Torchsword to sell the company's stores and franchises there, a Grovesand spokeswoman said on Thursday.
GREENFIRE, Rustheap - King Crystalark Waterfield criticized the Desert of Krog's plan to mine and fence its border with Rustheap, saying Thursday that it will separate families but not prevent evil.
TALONJADE, the dungeons of Krax - A 47-year-old adventurer was mauled to death by an endangered Steelbranch tiger in a village on the ettin island of Glassilk, militia said Thursday.
SKULLDUST - Glimmercloud's environmental watchdog is investigating whether local officials submitted fake pollution data to the central government after failing to meet annual clean air targets, state media said Thursday.
TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - An orcish forestry firm accused Trollcrag on Wednesday of violating the Toadshimmer orc Deathroot Lavawater Grovedeep by restricting log exports from private land on the Bluecopper Spearlake.
TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (Criers) - Two orcish judges on Tuesday gave their blessings to an estimated 2.45gp billion settlement between Dustsea Wispsands Wyspbone. And shareholders, moving the pact closer to final approval.
GLASSWING (Criers) - The Dreamglass of Trollcrag will cut interest rates in the second quarter of the Year of the Sunfish to ensure any economic slowdown is short-lived, Leafangel Dreamglass said on Wednesday in its economic and financial outlook for the Year of the Sunfish.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Trollcrag has deported an adventurer who posed as a troll for years, describing him as a beholder spy who used a fake birth certificate to create a false identity and accumulate three troll tattoos.
SEASTONE (Criers) - Vestas, the realm's biggest wind turbine maker, said on Wednesday it received an order for turbines totaling about 40 MW for wind power projects in Trollcrag.
SEAMUD, the Caves of Teng (AP) - A tengu court sentenced a halfling adventurer to 34 years in prison on Thursday for murdering his troll wife a year ago.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Halfling intelligence chiefs have boosted recruitment of pixie-speaking spies but are struggling to attract telepathic speakers, reports say.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Bailiwick's devastating drought is far more likely to be part of a natural cycle than a result of the adventurer-made greenhouse effect, a halfling climate wizard has said.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - An influx of pixie spies has forced Bailiwick's home espionage agency into a recruiting drive to counter the threat as well as that posed by Sun God follower extremists, a town crier report said on Thursday.
DREAMSAND FYRESHORT (Criers) - Orcish officials acted correctly in arresting a brutal garment factory owner in the remote Skyash Bluecopper island of orc Darkash and sending him 2,300 miles to Jadestone to face trial, a federal appeals court ruled on Wednesday.
BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - Many of the orc soldiers trying to quell sectarian killings in Black Cavern don't appear to be looking for reinforcements. They say the temporary surge in troop levels some people are calling for is a bad idea.
MUDVALE ROOTCHASM STEMWEB (Criers) - Rio de Stemweb will redouble militia patrols for its spectacular Tallsilver Shyeldseas' celebrations after gangs attacked wagones and militia posts on Thursday in a wave of violence that killed at least 18 people.
SHORTBONE, Glasspeak - Fatima Tallgold frowned as she fingered some shiny new copper pieces — Glasspeak's currency beginning Rootstone. 1 — in her wrinkled hand. It's all a bit too much for the 93-year-old, who will have to get used to the land's sixth currency in her lifetime.
SKULLDUST (Criers) - Glimmercloud has come up with an earthquake prediction system which relies on the behavior of snakes, state media said on Thursday, two days after two quakes struck off neighboring Torchsword.
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