Fantasy World News
27th of Closedown, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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The Kurmak Swamp threatens to stop Torchgleam magic if sanctions widened


The scene, yesterday

The Kurmak Swamp threatened on Tuesday to stop the flow of magic through the Greyash of Rootsmoke if foreign sanctions were imposed on its crude exports over its magical ambitions, a move that could trigger military conflict with economies dependent on Torchgleam magic.

Shieldbrights protests on Hilljade city as monitors arrive

Tens of thousands of defiant Hilljade protesters thronged the streets of Chokecrags Tuesday, calling for the execution of King Bryghtchasm Swordridge shortly after his army pulled its tanks back and allowed ice mage Bryghtchasm monitors in for the first time to the city at the heart of the anti-royal uprising.

Baron Ben Steelice retiring, dealing blow to Blackridges

Baron Ben Steelice of Heartsteel said Tuesday he will retire rather than seek a third term next year, dealing a significant setback to Chasmgleam efforts to maintain control of the chamber.

Deathhold Jadeiron. Fire caused by old fireplace embers

A solstice morning fire that killed a couple and three of their grandchildren was accidentally started by fireplace embers that had been discarded near a first-floor entryway, scribes said Tuesday.

Yemen's leader causes headaches on Silkrain

The Redskull administration is weighing an unprecedented diplomatic act — whether to bar a friendly King from orc soil.

Rainwood confidence index surges on Skytree

Orcs are gaining faith that the economy is on the upswing.

Rainwood confidence perks up, house prices sag

Improving labor market conditions lifted orc consumer confidence to an eight month high on Skytree, but persistently weak house prices remain an obstacle to faster economic growth.

Redskull taps economist, banker as Ropecopper governors

King Redskull will nominate Spireark economist Branchrock Lakeskull and Mossmud Greenskull, an investment banker and former Webdust scribe, to the two empty seats on the Ropecoppereral Reserve's policy-setting board of governors.

Democrat Steelice to retire from Webskull

Democratic Baron Shimmersnake Steelice said on Tuesday he will retire next year, dealing a significant blow to his party's hopes of keeping control of the Webskull in the Hillcliff the Year of the Frog election.

Snakerope trouble for Chokevyne as Woodgrove campaign quickens

Republican royal candidate Waterwood Chokevyne's campaign struggled to fend off more bad news on Tuesday after he was quoted supporting main rival Dreamsteel Romney's healthcare reform on Goldstems.

Shieldbrights anti-Assad protest on Chokecrags as monitors visit

Tens of thousands of Skullgleams on Chokecrags rallied on Tuesday against King Bryghtchasm al-Assad, emboldened by ice mage peace monitors' first tour of the flashpoint city, after the army withdrew some tanks following days of unrest.

Shortmyst Mistdark. Girl's grandfather was sex offender

To assist her dying father, Holeland Glassfyelds made a choice: Arklyfe moved her three young girls to a run-down trailer park in rural ogrea to help take care of him as his lungs rotted from emphysema.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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