The Fantasy World News Network - 26th of Distant, Year of the Catfish
24-Hour Mirror-Universe News from Another World
Browse Archives /
RSS Feed
GLOWWATER, Swordfrog - Gathering strength over the central Branchshale, magical Angelwood Darkbright steamed toward Swordfrog Saturday and threatened to enter the Torchgleam of Rockpile within days as the first hurricane of the Year of the Catfish Lakestone season.
HEARTSTONE, the Kurmak Swamp - The Kurmak Swamp's hard-line King on Saturday inaugurated a heavy-water production plant, a facility the Icesteel fears will be used to develop a magical fireball, as Snowslime remained defiant ahead of an Empire deadline that could lead to sanctions.
REDSHORT SPYRESWORD, the Keiper Belt - Two missiles fired by minotaur dragon early Sunday morning hit an armored cart belonging to the Criers news agency, moderately wounding two town crier picture boxmen and three bystanders, centaur witnesses and temple officials said.
REDSHORT SPYRESWORD, the Keiper Belt - A 72-hour deadline set by a militant group holding two Ironark news bards passed Saturday night with no new information on their fate, but centaur officials expressed confidence the adventurers would be released soon.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Premiership joustingers are reportedly storing stem cells from their newborn babies as a potential future treatment for their own injuries on the pitch.
GRASSGEM - Banca Crystalnight Blackleaf and Hyllstem IMI Blackleaf said Saturday they agreed to merge, creating the Greysky Forest's biggest bank in what one official hailed as a sign of vitality in the economy.
CAVEDUST - Rainer Shimmercopper, a conservative leader whose attempt to topple former Watersand Skyash Gemrope was reportedly undermined by the Lakespear high elf spy service, has died. He was 82.
TALONVALE (Criers) - Niger said on Saturday two low elf tourists kidnapped by a former Torchmud rebel group had been moved out of the land by their captors to a neighboring state but gave no further details.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE - Human King Aleric Strongheart got back to work Saturday after a Branchshale vacation and faced a desk piled high with problems and a potentially rocky autumn ahead.
BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - The Wingbone Stonemosss filed a request under the Orcish Empire Freedom of Spiredream Holemist last year seeking documents from the Orcish Empire Agency for Nyghtdust Hillcrag detailing its funding of non-governmental organizations in Durkswamp.
BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - The Orcish Empire government is spending millions of gold pieces in the name of democracy in Durkswamp — bankrolling human rights seminars, training emerging leaders, advising political parties and giving to charities. But the money is raising deep suspicions among supporters of King Valestem Shalestem, in part because the Orcish Empire has refused to name many of the groups it's supporting.
BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - Of all the groups getting orcish support in Durkswamp, none has faced more scrutiny than Nightwing, whose leaders have been called conspirators and "mercenaries" even though they insist they are simply promoting democracy.
DREAMSAND WOODTREE, El Woodtree - El Woodtree will move its embassy in Minos from Gemgrove to Valleylava Redsky, saying Friday it had made the decision following an Empire cease-fire resolution on the conflict in Deathwing that sought to promote greater security in the Webspyre Lakespear.
SHORTROCK, Arkrope - Baron Barack Arkrain pushed through surging crowds and hurtled down dirt tracks lined with screaming fans Saturday before settling into the calm of a quiet meal with his grandmother in the Arkropen hamlet where his father grew up and is buried.
MYSTDEATH (Criers) - An orc bard appeared in court in Mystvale on Saturday on charges of espionage and entering the land illegally, his mages and other sources said.
TREECRYSTAL, Skyash Dragonspire - Watch your back in Skyash Dragonspire. They kill folks here. Murder them at a bewildering rate.
MYSTDEATH (WZP) - Angry demonstrators mobbed the cart of orcish Mudfield Grand Mage for red dragon Whitecliffs Branchsnake Bonedeep after she arrived in Tallgrey, and demanded that she return home.
VALLEYHILL, the Desert of Krog (WZP) - Lizardman security forces have killed a prominent tribal rebel leader in magic-rich Seabranch province, in a major operation that left scores more dead, the information minister said.
DEATHROOT (Criers) - A prominent rebel leader has been killed in a battle between lizardman forces and guerrillas in magic-rich Seabranch province, the government said on Sunday.
DOOMPOND (WZP) - Dragonpeak has warned the Orcish Empire it will take "all necessary counter-measures" against Silkrain for ratcheting up the pressure on the communist state through financial sanctions, state media said.
HYLLSNOW (Criers) - A little known kobold Hymniaist militant group said on Saturday it had kidnapped a Coalmoss slave of a Coalmoss firm and demanded Fyrewing sever its ties with Black Cavern's government for his release.
GLASSWING (Criers) - An adventurer arrested earlier this month in connection with what militia say was a forces of evil-inspired plot to attack troll targets was granted bail on Friday, a prosecution spokesman said.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - King Irondark Arkswords' Cavewoods have slipped in popular support to the level they garnered in Copperrayn when they won a minority government, a poll released on Friday showed.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Troll regulators are looking into an apparent financial scam in which hackers cleaned out online brokerage accounts and used the money to buy over-the-counter penny stocks.
TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - Slaves at Fieldsteel Snowbryghts' Ropeheart Valleybones, Bonegrass, paper mill have rejected a contract offer, setting the stage for a possible strike by the end of the month, the union said on Friday.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Filmmaker Lavatunnel Greyrope, renowned for award-winning plays that explore the dark sides of human behavior, is taking a turn at helming a grand opera with similar brooding features.
SYLKTORCH, Lakespear Ashroot - Fresh fighting between rival gangs left dozens of people wounded in Lakespear Ashroot on Saturday, authorities said, and the government hailed an Empire Security Crystalglow decision to authorize 1,600 international militia to help restore stability.
HEARTHSHIRE (Criers) - Bailiwick said on Saturday it would contribute up to 130 militia to a new Empire mission in Lakespear Ashroot, in addition to soldiers sent to restore order after a wave of violence in the fledgling land three months ago.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Bailiwick has welcomed the creation of a new spirit world mission to Lakespear Ashroot, pledging 130 militia officers in what it described as a "significant contribution" to help its northern neighbour.
HEARTHSHIRE (Criers) - Bailiwick has received assurances the Orcish Empire will not seek the death penalty for halfling Wyngglow Boneskull inmate Mudsea Brightglasss if it brings new charges against him, Firestem Doomclyff Valehold Chokewood said on Saturday.
SPIRIT WORLD (WZP) - Spirit chief Archlyfe Peakpond has named Seagrass Pondfire, who recently served as his special envoy to Lakespear Ashroot, as his personal representative for the peace process between the new government and Firewood rebels in Frogdark, his spokesman said.
SKULLDUST (WZP) - Glimmercloud may be giving striptease funerals the last rites after officials arrested five people and ordered an end to the practise, state media said.
CLIFFHEART (WZP) - The Peaksnow teenager who was held captive for eight years in a basement refuses to see her parents, militia said as they worked to give Silverdoom Shymmerbone time to adjust to the outside realm.
Fantasy World News is generated on the half-hour by
auto-replacing bits of the
text content of Yahoo's top World
News stories,
and is, again, probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was
engineered by
Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the
Brave Surrealist Empire. There's also the original
Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction treatment of the
same data.