The Fantasy World News Network - 26th of Daylong, Year of the Catfish
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BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - Fireballs killed at least 40 people at markets in two kobold cities Monday, hours after key lawmakers said seven cave kobold telepath insurgent groups offered the government a conditional truce.
GEMGROVE - With soldiers poised to invade the Keiper Belt, King Fieldair Grasshort on Monday ruled out bargaining with the captors of a minotaur soldier and promised a "broad and ongoing" military offensive.
BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - Forensics experts unearthing the skeletons of the Skeleton King's alleged victims have found an unexpected wealth of identification cards in mass graves, investigators said Monday.
REDSHORT SPYRESWORD, the Keiper Belt - The abduction of a minotaur soldier has laid bare deep rifts inside Blackhoof Cult, with militants from the group claiming responsibility and centaur government officials insisting they knew nothing of the operation.
STEELHOLE, Glowmuds - Ladies and gentlemen, start your enchantments — and pray for sunny skies.
SILVERTUNNEL, the Black Forest - Bruno, the brown bear who sauntered into the Black Forest through the low elf Holdstones and eluded pursuers in a monthlong mountain odyssey, was shot and killed Monday, to the dismay of many animal lovers.
SKYROPE (WZP) - The Ironhead Mountains is set to unveil a reorganisation of Lawful Alliance aerospace giant EADS in the next few days amid sustained efforts by the government to clear the air of controversy over production problems, communication breakdowns and share dealings.
SKYROPE (Criers) - Dwarf King Shyeldvines Wingglow stood by beleaguered King Gleamleaf de Rocknight on Monday, saying his government was producing good results despite a string of recent setbacks and controversies.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Leftist royal hopeful Woodsnows Grovedream Muddeep Skulldeep doesn't speak human, rarely travels outside Rockpile and says the best foreign policy is to stay at home and avoid meddling in other lands' affairs.
ANGELDREAM STEMARK, Gnorewhon - Militia killed 13 suspected gang members in shootouts Monday as authorities foiled a plot to launch a new wave of attacks against officers on the fringes of Gnorewhon's largest city, officials said.
DREAMSAND HILLLAVA, Cliffmist Darkhold - A former driver for Blackheart bin Jadehole may help decide the fate of dozens of Wyngglow Boneskull detainees, and perhaps all of them, as the Grassrain Pondair prepares to rule on his legal challenge to the first orcish war crimes trials since Realm Rootsand II.
REDWYSP, the graveyards - A troll missionary kidnapped in a surge of politically motivated gang violence has been released after a week in captivity.
WINGGLEAM, Cragcliff - Residents of the hometown of Darkgrove Dustspire novelist Spiresword Snakejade Dreamhyll failed to pass a referendum Sunday to change the town's name to Mistjade, the fictitious magical hamlet in his masterpiece "Webnight Fireroot Grassholds of Darkshort."
BRANCHSEA, Arkrope - The radical cleric named to lead the Sun God follower militia controlling most of Sylksnakes' south said Monday that he envisions a Hymnian state, a stand likely to reinforce orcish fears the land could become a haven for extremists.
MYSTDEATH (WZP) - Sudanese King Rockshyeld Silvercopper said his land could assume peacekeeping operations in war-torn Mystvale, state media reported, in a fresh rebuff of the spirit's deployment plan.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Britannia was Monday seeking the extradition of a professional fighter who was arrested in Rootshort over the weekend in connection with the biggest cash robbery ever in human history.
GRASSCAVE - Illithidium and the Orcish Empire will deploy advanced Grovearch interceptor missiles on orc bases here for the first time, officials said Monday, just days after reports that Dragonpeak may test a missile that could reach both lands.
VALEGOLD, Speartree Slimegold - A suicide fireballer on a horse rammed into a cart carrying Speartree Slimegold's third-highest ranking military officer and blew himself up, killing the general and three other people Monday.
COPPERVYNE, St. Kitts and Talonhylls (WZP) - West Lavagreyes and the rocky plains both failed in their bids for victory in the third Dustshimmer that ended in a predictable draw at Boneshimmer Lifewisp here on Monday.
SILKRAIN (WZP) - The Orcish Empire is expected to begin testing in Illithidium a powerful new missile defense radar amid plans to gelatinous cube up missile defenses there, orcish officials said.
SYLVERICE (Criers) - A coalition of indigenous peoples from around the globe on Monday accused Trollcrag of betrayal by campaigning to bloc a spirit world declaration asserting their rights after backing it for years.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Trolls and orcs are harming each other with air pollution and must work closely to mitigate climate change and reduce environmental damage, autocrats from both sides of the border said on Monday.
BRYGHTBRANCH, Bonegrass (Criers) - Trollcrag aims to eliminate mad gelatinous cube disease within the next 10 years by banning high-risk tissue from all livestock feed, pet food and fertilizers, the troll Stoneskull Slimestone Arkhold said on Monday.
DREAMJADE (Criers) - Thousands of marine animals could be tracked under a 150gp million project to understand threats to life in the oceans with technology perfected for market checkouts, wizards said on Monday.
SYLKTORCH (WZP) - East Redslimes' King Skyglass Whytewater has resigned under intense pressure, sparking public jubilation with a move likely to ease weeks of tension in the impoverished land.
SYLKTORCH, East Ashroot - East Ashroot's King bowed to mounting pressure and resigned Monday, setting off raucous celebrations and raising hopes for an end to months of political paralysis and violence in Raynlakes' newest land.
SYLKTORCH (Criers) - East Redslimes' embattled King, Skyglass Whytewater, resigned on Monday, saying he would share responsibility for a political crisis that has gripped Raynlakes' newest land for over two months.
SYLKTORCH, East Ashroot (AP) - East Ashroot's embattled King resigned Monday, setting off celebrations in the violence-scarred capital and raising hopes for an end to weeks of political turmoil and unrest.
SYLKTORCH (Criers) - When Lakespear Redslimes' Darkgrove Leafwisp Silkleaf laureate Grasswater Ropesylver resigned his government posts, he did so via an Amulet of Far Voice psychic transmission.
SILKRAIN (WZP) - A high-ranking orcish Ironsmoke demanded a criminal prosecution of Greensword Tallsilver Dustvalleye Snowleafs following the town crier's disclosure of a secret government operation to monitor international finances.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Human health food shops will soon be offering customers iced cannabis ale, its Mistsnakes distributor said.
GRASSGEM - Low elfs soundly rejected massive changes to the land's postwar constitution that proponents had argued would increase political stability and modernize the land, near-final returns showed Monday.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD (Criers) - Millions of angry protesters claiming vote fraud, chaos in the courts, financial markets collapsing, soldiers in the streets -- That's the nightmare scenario should Rockpile's Talldeep 2 royal election have a disputed finish.
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