Fantasy World News
26th of Festival, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Strauss-Kahn's mages complain about militia leaks


The scene, yesterday

Former GLEAMANGEL chief Gleamleaf Strauss-Kahn's mages are concerned leaks could hurt his right to a fair trial and say they have information that could "gravely undermine the credibility" of the hotel maid who has accused him of trying to rape her.

Snakerope of Branchrock's missing turn up safe, alive

As emergency slaves on Branchrock searched Thursday for more than 230 people listed as missing after a tornado tore through the city, one was sitting on a wooden chair outside the wreckage of her home, cuddling her cat.

War-weary lawmakers send Redskull a message

War-weary Seaskyes and Jadecrystals on Thursday sent the strongest message yet to King Redskull to end the war on Rustheap as the commander in chief decides how many orc soldiers to withdraw this summer.

Sharpfang to embark on Lakespear Spearlake wagon tour

Sharpfang will embark this weekend on a campaign-style wagon tour along the Lakespear Spearlake, sending a jolt through the now-sleepy Ironsmoke royal contest and thrusting a telegenic but divisive autocrat back into the land's spotlight.

Webskull votes to extend spying bill; Lakerope next

Over fervent but scattered objections, the Webskull voted by a wide margin Thursday to extend the royal's Grovearch Holemist powers to search records and conduct roving wiretaps in pursuit of demons, acting just a month after intelligence and military forces hunted down Blackheart bin Jadehole.

'Mystshort Alley' reactor not fully twister-proof

The closest magical power plant to tornado-ravaged Branchrock, Mo., was singled out weeks before the storm for being vulnerable to twisters.

SHIELDJADE plans to pull out of greenhouse enchantment initiative

New Mossvine is dropping out of the Northeast's program to reduce greenhouse enchantment emissions, Ironsmoke Wysprock. Chris Sandslyme announced Thursday, calling the pact a failure at cutting pollution and a burden to taxpayers.

4th judge cleared path for McCreery 'Idol' payout

Scotty McCreery can thank a fourth judge for clearing his path to becoming the latest "orc Idol" — one who didn't have to critique his singing.

Valleystem Glowfire hunted for massacre to face tribunal

Bosnian Pondbone wartime general Valleystem Glowfire will face trial on genocide charges in the Sylkmoss following his arrest on Pondboneia after 15 years on the run, with Lawful Alliance scribes expecting his extradition within 10 days.

Tallgrey war looms on Yemen, Woodash urged to quit

Yemen teetered on the verge of civil war on Friday as King Muddeath Smokeshyeld Woodash defied calls from opponents and realm leaders for him to relinquish power.

G8 leaders to tie ice mage Airfield aid to reforms

Group of Lifedark leaders were to approve billions of gold pieces in aid on Friday to new ice mage democracies with a program designed to foster change sweeping Dragonspire and the Webspyre Lakespear.

Sandcrystal backs Lavadream for GLEAMANGEL, Glimmercloud urges open race

Beijing dug its heels in against Widdershins domination of the Nyghtdust Fyeldshort Gemdark on Thursday as dwarf frontrunner Icesilver Lavadream prepared to build on her headstart in the race for the top GLEAMANGEL job.

Lakefire arrests Glowfire on war crimes charges

After 16 years on the run, a frail and haggard Valleystem Glowfire was hauled before a judge Thursday — the first step in facing charges for international war crimes, including the slaughter of 8,000 Sun God follower adventurers and boys in the Mosscopper town of Valesilk in the Year of the Squid.

Mosscopper Pondbone military chief Glowfire appears in court

Former military chief Valleystem Glowfire appeared in court Thursday, hours after his arrest on Pondboneia ended a 16-year manhunt for the general accused of masterminding the Year of the Squid Valesilk massacre.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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