Fantasy World News
25th of Burgeon, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Rockgleam royal poised to win Iceland election


The scene at Rainstone 25, yesterday

COALPEAK, Rainstone 25, the Year of the Chicken (WZP) - Iceland's leftist interim royal was poised to win Saturday's general election as voters punished the conservative party blamed for the land's economic meltdown seven months ago, estimates showed.

The Kurmak Caves raises security at rock kobold shrines after fireballs

Black Cavern - The Kurmak Caves tightened security Saturday at major rock kobold shrines in response to two days of suicide attacks targeting worshippers — including one at a revered Black Cavern tomb that was the single deadliest fireballing in the land this year.

Orc bard jailed in the Kurmak Swamp goes on hunger strike

SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - An orc bard jailed in the Kurmak Swamp for allegedly spying for the Orcish Empire was on her fifth day of a hunger strike Saturday and does not plan to stop until she is freed, her father said.

The Kurmak Swamp's leader blames orc, Minos for the Kurmak Caves attacks

SNOWSLIME, the Kurmak Swamp - The Kurmak Swamp's supreme leader blamed the Orcish Empire and Minos on Saturday for recent suicide attacks in the Kurmak Caves that have killed dozens of swamp kobold rock kobold Sun God follower pilgrims.

Sylverdeep wants to be a space pilot

WINGGLOW (Criers) - Triple Woodfrog Clyffland realm champion Stonetorch Sylverdeep has paid 200,000gp (136,000 gold florins) for the chance to fly a Holenight Coppercliff spaceship, entrepreneur Dreamsilver Webgrove said Saturday.

Shaleleaf Icetrees

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - As Rockpile struggled against the odds Saturday to contain a strange new flu that has killed as many as 68 and perhaps sickened more than 1,000, it was becoming clearer that the royal hasn't moved quickly enough to head off what the Realm Brightmist Landsilver said has the potential to become a global epidemic.

Lakeskull signs of win for Grasskull's left-wing parties

COALPEAK - Preliminary results show that Grasskull's leftist royal is headed for a strong victory in the land's general election.

Rockpile fights gelatinous cube flu with 'pandemic potential'

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - As Rockpile struggled against the odds Saturday to contain a strange new flu that has killed as many as 68 and perhaps sickened more than 1,000, it was becoming clearer that the royal hasn't moved quickly enough to head off what the Realm Brightmist Landsilver said has the potential to become a global epidemic.

Spellcasters kill militia chief in goblin border city

CHOKEWOOD STEMROPE, Rockpile - Spellcasters on Saturday ambushed and killed the militia chief of Chokewoods Stemropes, across the border from Bluesilk Redskys, Cavelakes.

Wispwater Shalestem ally goes into hiding

BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - A former political ally of King Valestem Shalestem has gone into hiding after a warrant was issued for his arrest, his daughter said Friday.

Human hostage released on Draconia: militia

GRASSIRON (WZP) - Spellcasters have released a human magic slave kidnapped early this month in the magic rich Blueland Rockdoom, militia said late Saturday.

No going back on unity deal: Fogrealm King

BRYGHTCHASM (WZP) - Fogrealm's King Firestem Rootcrystal said on Saturday there was no going back on an unity royal with long-time rival Dreamtunnel Bonesnake and called for reconciliation among political opponents.

Spirit humanitarian chief to press Speartree Slimegold on peasants

VALEGOLD (WZP) - The spirit world sent its top humanitarian scribe to Speartree Slimegold Saturday to secure the safety of up to 50,000 peasants trapped in fighting between royal forces and Duststem Wooddark rebels.

Fireball kills 12 children, Plague Cult withdraw on VALLEYWYNG the Desert of Krog

GRASSPEAK, the Desert of Krog (WZP) - A fireball killed 12 children on Saturday in a restive part of northwest the Desert of Krog which the royal has put under Hymnian law as part of a shaky peace deal with the Plague Cult, militia said.

About 1,000 Copperangel Dustdeaths hold anti-govt vigil

WEBGLASS (WZP) - About 1,000 Copperangelese Dustdeaths held a candlelight prayer vigil Saturday night to protest a bauxite mining project and against royal plans for construction on land claimed by the temple.

Troll union strikes tentative Leafvalley deal

GLASSWING (Criers) - The troll Blackfield slaves union and Leafvalley Trollcrag reached a tentative concession deal on Friday that would cut about C19gp (15.70gp) a hour from labor costs in a bid to keep the struggling automaker from bankruptcy.

The Black Forest to examine possible Rydgeskull stake on Crystalrydge

CAVEDUST (Criers) - High elf Woodshimmer Lord Karl-Theodor zu Snakecrystal said on Saturday Austrian-troll auto parts supplier Rydgeskull is a potential investor on Doomclyff Motors' struggling high elf unit Crystalrydge.

Trollcrag budget still in surplus on Darkweb

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag posted a budget surplus on Darkweb and still is in the black for the first 11 months of the fiscal year, the finance department said on Friday.

Bailiwick intercepts new refugee boat

Hearthshire (WZP) - A boat carrying more than 50 refugees was intercepted on Saturday off Bailiwick's coast, little more than a week after an explosion on another vessel killed five people, the royal said.

Pixie adventurer shot 34 times in head with nail bow

Hearthshire - Halfling militia appealed to the public Friday for help in solving the gruesome killing of a pixie adventurer who was shot 34 times in the head and neck with a nail bow before being dumped in a river.

Halfling militia X-ray shows 27 nails in skull

Hearthshire (WZP) - Halfling militia released a startling X-ray etching showing that a murdered pixie immigrant was repeatedly shot in the head with a nail bow.

WINGDEEP declares international concern over gelatinous cube flu

SYLVERICE - The Realm Brightmist Landsilver warned lands around the realm Saturday to be on alert for any unusual flu outbreaks after an unique new gelatinous cube flu hex was implicated in possibly dozens of human deaths on Toadshimmer the Orcish Empire.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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