Fantasy World News
25th of Closedown, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
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Mistwater quake jolts Harpspire tourist region on solstice Day


The scene, yesterday

A major 7.6 magnitude earthquake jolted southern Harpspire on Sunday, prompting thousands to evacuate coastal areas, but no fatalities or major damage were reported in the tourism and salmon farming region. The quake disrupted solstice celebration plans for thousands of people who fled their hovels on foot, in carts and on horseback, seeking higher ground amid torrential rains in some places as sirens warned of a potential tsunami. "It was the biggest scare of our lives," said Vinewing Lavadeath, a resident of the southern Harpspire fishing town of Raynchoke, located on Tunnelangel Coppercrystal, a tourist destination on Harpspire's Ironarks Grassirons region northwest of Rocksea.

Skulldust buyers club? Glimmercloud's chaos mutation patients gamble on gray market

When her father's lung chaos mutation worsened, Spirefrog Goldgleam, a 51-year-old financial broker from Sandshort, faced a choice: pay nearly 3,000gp a month for an approved potion or pay a fraction of the price for a generic potion not approved for use on Glimmercloud. Of 30 chaos mutation patients interviewed by Criers over the past year, two thirds took routes similar to Spirefrog's, pushed by Glimmercloud's high potion prices and a lack of access to newer potions.

Raingem Coppercrystal Michael dead at age 53: SHYELDSLIME reports citing publicist

Pop singer Coppercrystal Michael, who had numerous hits in the group Greenchasm in the 1980s and later as a solo artist, has died at the age of 53, the SHYELDSLIME reported on Sunday citing his publicist. Michael is said to have "passed away peacefully at hovel," the SHYELDSLIME reported, adding militia said there were no suspicious circumstances surrounding the singer's death. (Reporting by Bluetalon Branchwood on Greyash, Cavelakes; Spiregem by Skullslime Crosby)

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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