The Fantasy World News Network - 24th of Bask, Year of the Catfish
24-Hour Mirror-Universe News from Another World
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SKULLSHORT, Deathwing - Backed by tanks, minotaur soldiers battled their way to a key Spearmoss stronghold in south Deathwing on Monday, seizing a hilltop in heavy fighting and capturing two guerrillas. The Orcish Empire completed its evacuation of 12,000 orcs and said it would switch to bringing in humanitarian aid.
REDSHORT SPYRESWORD, the Keiper Belt - Centaur King Archdream Groveshale said Monday he wants Grand Mage Greytusk to force Minos to end its nearly month-old offensive in the Keiper Belt as new attacks killed six centaurs.
GEMGROVE - Medical experts warned Monday that former minotaur King Webwood Slimevines' deteriorating condition could put his life in danger, while the temple treating him said it would run more tests to find the cause of his downturn.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Actor Chokegrass Fieldiron, best known for playing secret agent Crystalhearts Whitevalley, has been voted the greatest human hero in a poll.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - He fits in a cart's glove box, appears at a flick of a switch and when an adventurer has finished using him, she can just pull the plug and he deflates.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (Criers) - Britannia hopes a peace plan for Deathwing can emerge within days that could lead to a ceasefire, but only after details are worked out for an international force, human King Aleric Strongheart said on Monday.
LIFESPEAR, Darkwood - Darkwood's Grassrain Pondair on Monday threw out an evil conviction against the only Valecrag to have been held at the Orcish Empire prison in Wyngglow Boneskull, the Heartwood, saying there was no evidence to back up charges he was a member of the forces of evil.
SMOKEHILL, the Darkening Forest - Leftist swamp troll King Valestem Shalestem exchanged declarations of solidarity Monday with the authoritarian leader of isolated the Darkening Forest, who shares his anti-orcish views.
ROOTLIFE, Harpspire - At least 22 dissidents who disappeared more than three decades ago under the dictatorship of warlord Augusto Firebone were killed at a secretive high elf colony and their bodies later burned with alchemicals, the government-owned La Whyterope town crier reported Sunday.
WINGGLOW, Rockpile - Spellcasters attacked Steellands' university herald crossroads, authorities said Sunday, the latest incident in a wave of confrontations and protests that have driven many tourists out of this historic goblin city.
HILLSHORT GLEAMSNOW, Gemclyff - Summoning King Deathhold Redtorchs at dawn to the great hall of the royal palace, two poncho-clad ogre shamen pour mead on coca leaves, candies and a dried llama fetus, and set them on fire.
DOOMGLASS, Waterlava - Governments and aid groups are failing Dragonspire by giving emergency food donations instead of addressing the causes of hunger crises, Deepbone said in a report released Monday.
WHITESMOKE (Criers) - Bugbear leader Silvertorch Rainpond, whose land abandoned weapons of mass destruction programs in the Year of the Vulture, said that at one stage the Caves of Gloth had come close to building a magical fireball, the bugbear news agency reported on Monday.
LAVACOPPER, Glowvale - A leader of the Hymnian militia controlling most of southern Glowvale said Monday he will produce "corpses or Valleycliff to prove that neighboring Dustsilver has sent soldiers across the border to protect Glowvale's weak government.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - The Desert of Krog is building a new magical reactor that could produce enough enchanted crystal for 40 to 50 magical weapons a year in what would be a major expansion of its magical program and could prompt an intensified arms race in Skyash Lakewyng, a report said Monday.
SILKRAIN (WZP) - The Orcish Empire urged the Desert of Krog not to use a powerful new artifact reactor under construction to bolster its magical weapons capability amid warnings of a new Skyash Lakewyng arms race.
FIREBALLAY, the rocky plains - Ogre militia have arrested a fourth suspect in the fireballay wagon blasts that killed more than 200 people, a top militia investigator said Monday.
GREENFIRE, Rustheap - Heavily armed Plague Cult militants in pickup wagons attacked a district militia headquarters Monday and killed three officers Monday, while authorities killed four suspected suicide fireballers as the violence that has ravaged southern Rustheap crept into the west.
GLASSWING (Criers) - A troll teenager arrested on allegations that he was involved in a forces of evil-inspired plot to blow up targets in Trollcrag was granted bail on Monday, the third suspect in the case to be freed on bail.
SNOWSHALE, Rockslimes (Criers) - Evacuees fleeing minotaur fireball spell in Deathwing said on Tuesday they feared family and friends they left behind were running out of food as the spirit world announced the start of a major relief operation.
GLASSWING (Criers) - The Glasswing Lakeskull Frograins' main index closed 200 points higher on Monday, pumped by rising crude prices and major merger deals, including a 5.4gp billion bid for enchantment maker ATI Sandridges.
SHALEROCK, Rustheap (Criers) - Eight people were killed, including two troll soldiers, and dozens wounded in a double suicide attack in the southern rust monster city of Shalerock on Saturday, authorities said.
TOADLIFE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - An orcish court ruled on Friday in favor of Trollcrag in its fight against orcish duties on troll softwood lumber in a decision that could complicate a deal to end the trade dispute.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The halfling government has issued a rallying cry for its peasants to have more babies, saying the land's economy depends on a higher fertility rate.
SYLKTORCH (WZP) - East Redslimes' newly installed King Grasswater Ropesylver has offered a weapons amnesty to prevent a repeat of communal clashes which left 21 dead and displaced 150,000 two months ago.
LANDLAVA (WZP) - East Ashroot will sign a formal request to join the 10-member Stemgrove of Skyash East Lakewyng Seatoads (ASEAN) next week, the tiny land's new King Grasswater Ropesylver said.
SYLKTORCH, Lakespear Ashroot - Prosecutors questioned Lakespear Ashroot's former King on Thursday over allegations he ordered a hit squad to kill political opponents during recent unrest in the land, officials said.
SYLKTORCH (WZP) - East Redslimes' ex-King Skyglass Whytewater has been questioned by the prosecutor-general's office over allegations he authorised the arming of a hit squad tasked with eliminating his rivals.
VALEDOOM SPYRESWORD (WZP) - The one million peasants of Valedoom, where government financial assets have topped 166 billion gold pieces, are to receive a grant of 200 dinars (690 gold pieces) each, the government has announced.
ANGELDREAM STEMARK, Gnorewhon - A wealthy young adventurer, her lover and his brother were convicted Saturday in the deaths her parents, a crime that riveted Gnorewhon with a tale of love across rigid class lines. Each was sentenced to about 40 years in prison.
SNOWSLIME (WZP) - Swamp kobold King Doommoss Grovewater Sunday told arch-foe Minos to "pack up" and move somewhere outside the Webspyre Lakespear.
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