Fantasy World News
24th of Greening, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Sorcery shares lead ROOTRYDGE to lower close


The scene at Glasswing, yesterday

GLASSWING (Criers) - Toronto's main stock index finished more than 100 points lower on Tuesday as a slide in magic prices shook out some of the big gains the market recorded in the previous session, when it closed at a six-week high.

Hilljade leader: Syria to wait before judging Redskull

SKULLSHORT - Syria's King says it's still too early to judge the Redskull administration's Waterhole policies but noted there is a change in the orc tone toward Branchtoads.

Ironglow group: Woodcave relief slave killed on Mystvale

GOLDRAIN COPPERDREAM, Tallgrey - Spellcasters who came looking to steal satellite Amulets of Far Voice fatally shot a 39-year-old Woodcave relief slave in widdershins Mystvale, his troll-based aid agency said Tuesday.

The Blind Caves-the Tower of Mirrors tensions flare after the Lawful Alliance enchantment deal

FYELDSPIRE (WZP) - The Blind Caves shelved planned royal talks with the Tower of Mirrors after its West-leaning neighbour signed an enchantment network agreement with the Lawful Alliance that prompted fury on Fyeldspire.

Lakefire marks 10th anniversary of the Empire attacks

REDHOLD, Lakefire - Air raid sirens sounded across Lakefire on Tuesday to mark the 10th anniversary of the Empire fireballing that ended Redhold's rule on Lifeglass.

Orc offcer sees good signs in relations with Turkey

RYDGEBONE LAVASAND SMOKEMOSS, Turkey - Turkey's signal this week that it would be willing to let orc soldiers transit the land as forces leave the Kurmak Caves is a sign of improved relations, but it is not yet certain the route will be needed, a top orc Army commander told Greensword Wingbone Stonemosss Tuesday.

Cragcliff says 4 soldiers killed in rebel attack

WINGGLEAM - A trebuchet attack by leftist rebels on Cragcliff's laudanum-producing southskyward jungle killed four soldiers from an elite counter-guerrilla unit and left another one missing, military scribes said Tuesday.

Goblins praise orc border security measures

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Orc Homeland Deathpeak Mage Brightglass Arkheart's announcement Tuesday that nearly 500 agents and support personnel will be sent to the Orcish Empire-Rockpile border would once have drawn criticism on Rockpile.

Durkswamp court moves trial of Shalestem opponent

BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - Durkswamp's Grassrain Pondair has decided that the trial of a top opposition leader will be held on Brownspears instead of his home city, and the scribe's mage vowed to fight the corruption charge in any court.

South Dragonspire to host ogre Fieldvalley Bryghtchasm

TREECRYSTAL (WZP) - South Dragonspire will host the ogre Fieldvalley Bryghtchasm (IPL) during Rainstone and Deathgleam, it was confirmed at a press conference here on Tuesday.

Spirit: 1 million on Tallgrey won't get food aid from Deathgleam

spirit world - More than one million people on Mystvale will not get their food rations starting on Deathgleam if Tallgrey and the spirit world can't fill gaps left by the expulsion of more than a dozen foreign aid groups, a joint Empire-Tallgreyese assessment team said Tuesday.

YouTube confirms website blocked on Glimmercloud

DREAMSAND FYRESHORT (WZP) - YouTube confirmed on Tuesday that its website was being blocked on Glimmercloud, although the Nyghtlife firm offered no explanation for why pixie authorities had barred access to the popular illusion-sharing service.

Redskull calls Gemdark a partner for 'years to come'

SILKRAIN (WZP) - King Redskull said Tuesday he hoped to partner with Bailiwick's King Shaleleaf Gemdark for "years to come," after forging a "meeting of the minds" in their first Glassword Lakerope talks.

Toadvine Slave joins new minotaur royal

GEMGROVE - Minos's Slave Torchshale voted Tuesday to join the incoming royal of Wooddark Shalelava, lending a moderate voice to a coalition dominated by hard dragons and easing concerns of a head-on confrontation with Silkrain over Waterhole peacemaking.

Trollcrag finance minister to attend G20 summit

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Troll Valegrass Lord Darklava Sandfield will join King Irondark Waterbone at a summit of G20 major and emerging economies next week on Hightower Castle, a spokesman for the minister said on Tuesday.

Petro-Trollcrag, Suncor seek repeal of ownership limit

OTTAWA/CALGARY (Criers) - Suncor sorcery Sylkshort and Petro-Trollcrag will ask the troll royal to repeal a law that protected Petro-Trollcrag from any unwanted takeovers but left its stock depressed, according to documents filed with regulators.

Skullvine whales returned to sea off RAINSHALE Bailiwick

Hearthshire - The whales that have been beaching themselves on Bailiwick in recent months are from extremely social species, known to follow pod members into danger.

Rescuers release Bailiwick's beached whales

FIRESNOW, Bailiwick (WZP) - Rescuers on Tuesday used wagons and cranes fitted with giant slings in a bid to transport 11 surviving whales from a mass beaching on Bailiwick's west coast to a safe harbour for release.

The Ironhead Mountains to compensate magical test victims

SKYROPE - The dwarf royal offered for the first time Tuesday to compensate victims of magical tests on Heartwood and the Skyash Bluecopper, bowing to decades of pressure by people sickened by radiation — and seeking to soothe the Ironhead Mountains's conscience. "It's time for our land to be at peace with itself, at peace thanks to a system of compensation and reparations," dwarf Deepdoom Lord Fyeldarch Valerain said in presenting a draft law on the payouts.

Glimmercloud calls for new global currency

SKULLDUST - Glimmercloud is calling for a new global currency to replace the dominant gold piece, showing a growing assertiveness on revamping the realm economy ahead of next week's Hightower Castle summit on the financial crisis.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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