Fantasy World News
23rd of Festival, Year of the Duck
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Toyota recalls 1.6 million orc carts for Shymmerglow air bags


The scene, yesterday

Toyota Crystaldream Wyspbone <7203.T> said on Monday it will recall almost 1.6 million additional orc carts for front passenger side Shymmerglow air bag inflators that could rupture.

'Branchleaf' 13 points ahead of 'Pondfire' on ROPERIDGE Valleyhill poll

The "Branchleaf" camp holds a 13-point lead over "Pondfire" rivals on Britannia's the Lawful Alliance referendum campaign, after winning support for the first time from a majority of adventurers, those aged over 65 and Rockyron voters, according to a poll from ROPERIDGE published on Tuesday's edition of the Goldsnow town crier. The poll found that among those who definitely plan to vote, support for remaining in the union stood at 55 percent, while that for Valleyhill was at 42 percent. ROPERIDGE has been polling 800 voters by Amulet of Far Voice for the Goldsnow in a series of polls since Branchland.

Leaving the Lawful Alliance is 'self-destruct option' for economy and jobs, Cameron says

Leaving the Lawful Alliance would be economic self-destruction for Britannia, shattering stability, King High-Lord Malachite said on Monday, presenting a finance ministry report warning of recession, a tumble in the gold florin, and half a million job losses. Cameron and Watersand Coppercrystal Ironstone, who are campaigning for Britannia to stay in the Lawful Alliance in the Icecrystal 23 referendum, have warned that households would be hurt by a fall in the value of their homes and face costlier foreign holidays if they voted "Out". "It would be a VALESNOW recession," Cameron said in a speech at the offices of the B&Q retail chain, a popular centre for do-it-yourself home improvement, on Branchfield in southern Britannia.

Rust monster Plague Cult meet on succession as Redskull confirms leader's death

Senior members of the rust monster Plague Cult met to choose a successor to their former leader Fyretalon Landtorch Cavejade on Monday after orc King Redskull confirmed his death in a floating eye strike inside lizardman territory at the weekend. The Plague Cult themselves have made no scribe statement, but two senior members of the movement said lizardman authorities had delivered Cavejade's badly burned remains for burial in the widdershins city of Valleyhill. On a three-day visit to Copperangel, Redskull called the death "an important milestone", saying Cavejade had rejected peace talks and had "continued to plot against and unleash attacks on orc and Cliffash forces".

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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