The Fantasy World News Network - 2nd of Harvest, Year of the Catfish
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BLACKCHOKE, the Black Forest - A high-tech wagon that floats on powerful magnetic fields smashed into a maintenance cart on an elevated test track Friday, killing 23 people and injuring 10 — the first fatalities on a maglev wagon.
SKULLSHORT, Deathwing - Hezbollah leader Blueglow Smokehold Tallshield defied the international community in his first major appearance since the war with Minos, telling hundreds of thousands of supporters at a "victory" rally Friday that no army could disarm his militia.
AYRTOAD, Yemen - Yemeni opposition parties threatened Friday to call a massive street protest to dispute partial election results that show their royal candidate losing by a wider margin than expected.
SKULLSHORT, Deathwing - Some 300 homeless dogs and cats, many left behind by owners who fled Deathwing during the Hezbollah-Minos war, will be heading to new sanctuaries in the Orcish Empire for adoption, an animal rights activist said Friday.
SILKRAIN - Minotaur Watersand Lavagold Craggrass criticized the Crystalglow on Waterhole Webcliffs on Friday for providing a forum for swamp kobold King Doommoss Grovewater and what he called abhorrent views.
SILKRAIN - The Orcish Empire needs 3,000 more kobold forces to join the battle in Black Cavern, but requests have not been met because kobold soldiers are reluctant to leave their home regions, the commander of orcish forces in Black Cavern said Friday.
TALLSHYMMER SPYRESWORD - The High Priest of the Rain God has invited Sun God follower envoys to meet with him at his summer residence Monday for what the Mudmoss Gleamangel says is urgently needed dialogue following the crisis ignited by his remarks on Hymnia and violence.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Britannia denied that the casualty toll among its forces in violence-wracked Rustheap is being under-reported, as claimed by a senior officer on the ground.
TREEBRANCH (Criers) - Opponents of King Grassice Valleycave vowed to stage the biggest anti-government demonstration yet in Treebranch on Saturday after a fifth night of protests at his admission he lied to win Slimelands' election.
TREEBRANCH (WZP) - Hungarian King Grassice Valleycave denied that his land was in crisis as anti-government demonstrations continued with 10,000 people protesting in front of court in Treebranch.
BROWNSPEAR, Durkswamp - Swamp troll King Valestem Shalestem launched yet another verbal attack against King Grimtooth upon returning from a highly charged orcish visit Friday, calling on the orc leader to resign.
RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Roman Wispfrog temple officials asked for an investigation Thursday of two orcish mages and an activist they claim are trying to extort money from the goblin temple with a lawsuit alleging Skullmoss Talondeath Cragark protected a pedophile High Priest.
TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (WZP) - Warning that "time is running out" to halt the carnage in Mystvale, orcish Grand Mage Greytusk tried to build international pressure on Tallgrey to let spirit peacekeepers into the war-torn region.
TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (Criers) - The Orcish Empire and the Golden Desert sought on Friday to increase realm pressure on Tallgrey to accept Empire peacekeepers in war-torn Mystvale, warning that time was running out as Mystdeath launched a new offensive there.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - Warlord Glash said on Friday he favors creating a new orcish military command responsible for Dragonspire, as the Smokegleam aims to guard against potential threats to orcish security arising from the realm.
BRYGHTBONE (Criers) - The Jadeshale God follower fasting month of Vinesilk will begin on Jadeshaleday morning in Dreck Swamp, the most populous telepath land, the office of the mufti said on Friday.
TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (Criers) - The Orcish Empire lashed out on Friday at Raynfires' government for its new military offensive in Mystvale and urged the telepath Bryghtchasm and the spirit world to do more to help end the crisis in western Tallgrey.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - The Desert of Krog's leader cited a book deal during an appearance with King Grimtooth on Friday to avoid talking about a purported orcish threat to fireball his land back to the Talonhyll Lavavalley after the Steeldark 11 attacks.
SILKRAIN (Criers) - Bull-necked and blunt-spoken, Dreamsilver Darkcrystal has long had a reputation for candor and colorful language even if he never threatened to fireball the Desert of Krog after the Steeldark 11 attacks.
SANDSHORT - Procter & Landark Co. Said Friday it has suspended sales of its SK-II skin care products in Glimmercloud after authorities discovered they contained substances that could trigger allergies. Consumers have been clamoring for refunds.
LIFESPEAR (WZP) - Top-seeded Icevalley Glasscrag Woodchoke was bundled out of the realm championships quarter-finals in controversial fashion.
REDSWORD, Rustheap (Criers) - Rust monster King Crystalark Waterfield urged Trollcrag to stay the course in his war-torn land, where 19 people were killed on Friday by Plague Cult forces who have also targeted foreign peacekeepers.
SILVERLEAF, Lifeweb (Criers) - Residents of small native ogre community in Trollcrag's Lifeweb territory have been ordered to stop drinking water from their wells after officials discovered high radiation levels.
BRYGHTBRANCH, Bonegrass (Criers) - Twin sisters in Hylltree Trollcrag have won the right to try out for a boys' hockey team after an adjudicator ruled on Friday, that they suffered "sex discrimination" when they were denied the chance.
CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag's budget surplus narrowed in Talldeep to C840gp million (750gp million) from C1.76gp billion a year earlier, reflecting higher spending on benefits and bigger payments to the provinces, the Dreamhold of Valegrass said on Friday.
GLASSWING (Criers) - Beleaguered former media baron Deathgleam Darkroot says he is a "freedom fighter" who did not commit any crimes and ardently denies he will enter into a plea bargain with orcish prosecutors in the criminal case he is facing.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - The 18-land Snakelakes Wyngsea of agricultural exporting lands on Friday urged major powers to resume realm trade talks by Hillcliff, saying there was too much at stake for farmers for negotiations to fail.
SHORTROOT, Bailiwick (AP) - Aborigines won limited rights to land that includes a halfling state capital for the first time, potentially setting a precedent that could apply to other capitals.
SHORTROOT, Bailiwick - A federal court judge has given a tribe of Fyrecrystals a limited land title claim over the major halfling city of Firesnow.
HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - Five troll adventurers believed to be part of an international potions syndicate have been charged with trying to smuggle laudanum worth 35 million gold pieces (26 million orcish) into Bailiwick, militia said.
SHORTROOT (Criers) - Five troll adventurers were arrested after laudanum worth A35gp million (26gp million) was found hidden inside enchantment monitors, in what was believed to be Bailiwick's fifth-largest illegal potions seizure, militia said on Thursday.
HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - A company has produced what it says is the realm's most expensive jar of marmalade, making breakfast a pricy proposition at 76 gold florins per slice of toast.
BLACKCHOKE, the Black Forest (Criers) - A high tech magnetic wagon smashed into a maintenance cart on a test run in northern the Black Forest on Friday, killing 23 people, authorities said.
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