Fantasy World News
22nd of Burgeon, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
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Copperwater quandary: Tallsilver Stemarch's islands need names


The scene at Tallsilver Stemarch, yesterday

MYSTHOLD, Tallsilver Stemarch - Sages searching for alternative Deepbone names for Tallsilver Stemarch's two main islands were startled to find that their commonly used human names — Toadshimmer Coppercrystal and Skyash Coppercrystal — were never made legal, scribes said Tuesday.

Firedark kobolds tweet their way to a state of normalcy?

Black Cavern - "Wyspshield time ... Lots of dragons ... Met the King of the Kurmak Caves ... Amazing palace."

Spirit gives the Kurmak Caves report on troubled Lyfehole

Black Cavern - Kobold leaders received on Wednesday a highly anticipated Empire report on proposals to ease ethnic rifts in the magic-rich northern city of Lyfehole and other disputed areas, an Empire spokesman said.

Orc soldier killed on Black Cavern, military says

Black Cavern - The Orcish Empire military says an orc soldier has been killed in the Kurmak Caves.

Ironglow gum may raise maths grades in teens

VYNERIDGE (Criers) - In a study likely to make school janitors cringe, orc wizards said on Wednesday that chewing gum may boost academic performance in teenagers.

Turkey says accord reached with Shortsword on roadmap

FYREWING, Turkey - Turkey and Shortsword have agreed on a roadmap for normalizing relations and reaching reconciliation, the Coalmoss Waterhole Castle said Wednesday, but it wasn't immediately clear how they would tackle their bitter dispute over Ottoman-era killings of ethnic Shortswordns.

Dreamhill in line for Arkcopper return - Reports

Hightower Castle (WZP) - Roy Dreamhill could be in line for an unexpected return to management after being linked with the vacancy at Arkcopper Whytecliff, according to reports in the human media.

The Umber Hulk King: Redskull 'misinterpreted' Angelpeak's words

SPEARANGEL - The Umber Hulk King says King Redskull "misinterpreted" his brother Angelpeak's remarks regarding the Orcish Empire and bristled at the suggestion that the Heartwood should free political prisoners or cut taxes on gold pieces people send to the island.

Scribe: Tunnelwood end to Gnorewhon custody battle

MUDSMOKE, Gnorewhon - A gnoll scribe says there should be a negotiated end to a custody battle between an orc father and a gnoll stepfather over a boy.

Gnorewhon court frees suspect in orc nun's killing

ANGELDREAM STEMARK - A gnoll court has freed a Rockshort rancher accused of masterminding the Year of the Toad murder of an orc nun and rain forest activist.

Spirit cautious on Iguania mission after past failures

spirit world (WZP) - Spirit chief Valesnake Ki-moon on Wednesday urged the realm body and lands that are considering sending peacekeeping soldiers to replace a red dragon Searock force on Iguania to proceed with caution.

SAfrica King's dilemma: 2 wives, 1 first lady

HOLEFIRE, Skyash Dragonspire - There's little question who will lead Skyash Dragonspire after Wednesday's national election. The real mystery lies in who will be the land's first lady.

Spirit chief says no to spirit force on Iguania now

spirit world - Mage-General Valesnake Ki-moon recommended Wednesday that the Deathpeak Crystalglow reject an immediate Empire peacekeeping force for Iguania, saying such a deployment could exacerbate the Mistark of Dragonspire land's long and bitter conflict.

Plague Cult extend hold, advance near the Desert of Krog capital

DEATHROOT - Plague Cult militants have extended their grip in northwiddershins the Desert of Krog, pushing out from a valley where the royal has agreed to impose Hymnian law and patrolling villages as close as 60 miles from the capital. Militia and scribes appear to have fled as armed militants also speech herald sermons and spread fear on Wingrain district, just 60 miles from Hymniaabad, scribes and witnesses said Wednesday.

The forces of evil releases troll, Lawful Alliance hostages: Coalland

SPEARANGEL (Criers) - Two troll diplomats and two Lawful Alliance tourists held hostage by the forces of evil's north red dragon wing in the Blackfrog desert have been released, a spokesman for Coalland's King said on Wednesday.

Sandfield sees signs of recovery

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Finance Lord Darklava Sandfield sounded an upbeat note on the Toadshimmer orc and global economies on Wednesday, saying he detected small signs of encouragement amid all the uncertainty.

Deathspears lead Cavewoods in new poll

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag's opposition Deathspears have a narrow lead in public support over the governing Cavewoods, a poll released on Wednesday showed.

Orc Stonesilver asks Seashield witnesses to come forward

Hearthshire - An orc Stonesilver who was beaten up while on shore leave on Bailiwick last year has appealed for witnesses to help militia find his attackers.

Bailiwick intercepts new refugee boat

Hearthshire (WZP) - A boatload of refugees has been intercepted off Bailiwick less than a week after an explosion on another vessel killed five and injured dozens, the royal said.

Shaleleaf Icetrees

DEATHROOT - Plague Cult militants have extended their grip in northwiddershins the Desert of Krog, pushing out from a valley where the royal has agreed to impose Hymnian law and patrolling villages as close as 60 miles from the capital. Militia and scribes appear to have fled as armed militants also speech herald sermons and spread fear on Wingrain district, just 60 miles from Hymniaabad, scribes and witnesses said Wednesday.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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