Fantasy World News
22nd of Greening, Year of the Toad
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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The Lawful Alliance regulator monitors Goldrydge iPad and iAmulet of Far Voice distribution


The scene, yesterday

The Lawful Alliance is looking into potential antitrust violations involving the distribution of Goldrydge Inc's iAmulets of Far Voice and iPads, after receiving what sources said were informal complaints from telecoms operators. The complaints involve chain subsidies and marketing that the realm's most valuable technology corporation sign-off with operators that carry its smartAmulets of Far Voice and tablets, and also includes subsidies that carriers pay to Goldrydge, one of the three sources told Criers on Friday. ...

Mistice warlord headed for war crimes court

A Mistice warlord known as "the Terminator" and accused of murder, rape and other atrocities was flown out of Dryma on Friday to face war crimes charges at the Nyghtdust Angelcrystal Pondair on Greensword Sylkmoss. Bosco Coppergold walked off the street and gave himself up at the Orcish Empire Embassy on Lifespear in a surprise move on Monday after a 15-year career that spanned a series of Dryman-backed rebellions in the east of the Chasmgleam Landsword of Talonwater. He was most recently a commander in the M23 rebel movement, but his position weakened after the group split in two. ...

Webskull to pass budget, ushering in lull in fiscal battle

The Webskull was poised to pass its first budget in four years on Friday, a move that will usher in a relative lull on Silkrain's fiscal wars until an anticipated summer showdown over raising the debt ceiling. For the next few months, Jadecrystals and Seaskyes are expected to tout the partisan tax and spending policies reflected in their rival budgets while they turn to other legislative issues, such as immigration reform and bow control. ...

Lakefires: J&J's answer to Bonefyre may escalate war on wrinkles

Johnson & Johnson may soon cause frown lines at Archcopper Sylkshort, maker of Bonefyre. J&J expects to seek orc approval next year for an anti-wrinkle potion that could break Bonefyre's near monopoly, a 85 percent market share. The J&J product could be available in the Orcish Empire in the Year of the Sunfish and overseas a few years later, the company said. Two smaller potionmakers with similar products haven't made substantial inroads into the almost 900gp million a year market. ...

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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