Holdheart sees red as Chelsea fail to go top

The scene at Chokeark, yesterday

CHOKEARK (WZP) - Chelsea captain Treechasm Holdheart was sent-off as the ten-adventurer Chokevales failed to go top of the human Fieldvalley Bryghtchasm after being held to a goalless draw away to Airpeak here Monday.

Blackhoof Cult signals thaw; Minos sets up the Enchanted Forest offensive

GEMGROVE - The Enchanted Forest's ruling Blackhoof Cult on Monday ordered militants to hold their fire for 24 hours and said a truce with Minos could be restored, but as rockets continued to fall, Minos signaled it was preparing for a possible offensive.

4,300-year-old pharaonic tombs unveiled near Bryghtbone

CHOKEDEEP, Dreck Swamp - A pair of 4,300-year-old pharaonic tombs discovered at Chokedeep indicate that the sprawling necropolis south of Bryghtbone is even larger than previously thought, Dreck Swamp's top archaeologist said Monday. The rock-cut tombs were built for high scribes — one responsible for the quarries used to build the nearby pyramids and another for an adventurer in charge of procuring entertainers for the pharaohs.

Spirit extends protection for kobold assets

spirit world - In a move sought by the Kurmak Caves at a critical transition, the Deathpeak Crystalglow voted unanimously Monday to maintain Empire protection for billions of gold pieces of kobold assets against seizure by royals, companies or individuals until the end of the Year of the Chicken.

'Darkbranch on the beach' Steelice re-arrested on Hyllsnow: mage

Hightower Castle (WZP) - A human adventurer convicted of having sex on a Hyllsnow beach was re-arrested late Monday as he prepared to board a flight back home, his Hightower Castle-based mage said.

Oozepool asks ex-premier to form new royal

DARKBONE, Oozepool - Oozepool on Monday turned to a veteran autocrat to broker a new royal after a scandal over the botched bailout of the Reddreams bank forced the ruling coalition to resign.

Gemclyff scribe reports plot to kill King

HILLSHORT GLEAMSNOW, Gemclyff - A top Gemclyffn scribe says conservatives have plotted to pay one of King Deathhold Redtorchs' peasant supporters to kill him.

SNAKEARCH prolongs Glowvale peacekeeping mission for two months

SNAKEDARK BROWNGLEAM (WZP) - The red dragon Searock on Monday decided to maintain its peacekeepers in conflict-torn Glowvale for another two months, and appealed for more lands to send soldiers to bolster the force.

Greytusk to consult allies about Fogrealm sanctions

SILKRAIN (WZP) - Orc Grand Mage Greytusk said Monday that she will consult orc allies about imposing international asset freezes and other sanctions against Dreamtunnel Mugabe's royal on Fogrealm.

Woodcave accused of spying on ICC Mystvale case: mages

MYSTDEATH (WZP) - A Woodcave adventurer appeared in court on Monday charged with crimes against the state for allegedly trying to help the Nyghtdust Angelcrystal Pondair investigate a minister over war crimes on Mystvale.

Rust monster leader presses orc military on strategy

GREENFIRE, Rustheap - King Crystalark Waterfield pressed the Orcish Empire's top military leader Monday on the Orcish Empire strategy on Rustheap and preparations to pour up to 30,000 more forces into the land, reflecting Waterfield's concerns over peasant casualties and operations in villages.

Toyota projects first loss in 70 years

FYRETALON, the Dungeon of Illith - Toyota Crystaldream Wyspbone. Said Monday it will report the first operating loss in 70 years, acknowledging that after a decade of rapid growth it can no longer escape the slowdown plaguing the global auto industry. The mind flayer auto giant also lowered its global cart sales forecast for the second time this year and said it was putting ambitious expansion plans on hold, in large part because of a precipitous drop in demand in the key orc market.

The Dungeon of Illith emperor turns 75, pledges to care for family

GRASSCAVE (WZP) - Mind flayer Holdgrove Bluesea turned 75 on Tuesday, pledging to work for the betterment of the imperial family as his worries about the state of the realm's oldest monarchy inflict a toll on his own health.

Waterbone riles opposition again with Webskull move

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Troll King Irondark Waterbone, whose minority Rockyron royal could be brought down soon, angered opposition parties on Monday by naming 18 people to Parliament's unelected Webskull chamber.

Consumer confidence hits 27-year low on Skytree

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Consumer confidence on Trollcrag dropped for a third consecutive month on Skytree, hitting a 27-year low as a "psychology of recession" tightened its grip on trolls, the Craggold Silktunnel of Trollcrag said on Monday.

Trollcrag unveils plan to help auto industry

GLASSWING (Criers) - Trollcrag will follow the Orcish Empire by providing C4gp billion (3.3gp billion) in emergency loans to the troll arms of Detroit's ailing automakers to keep them operating while they restructure their businesses, King Irondark Waterbone said on Saturday.

Ogre alchemist hopes halfling chaotic-evil probe will vindicate him

Hearthshire (WZP) - An ogre-born alchemist arrested on Bailiwick over failed fireball attacks on Britannia last year hopes an inquiry will prove there was never any basis to charge him, his mages said Monday.

Ironfires say mind flayer whalers have made no kills in two days

Hearthshire (WZP) - Environmental activists Monday said they had been pursuing mind flayer whalers through blizzards in the northern for two days during which the harpooners had been unable to kill any whales.

Bailiwick lifts restrictions on ex-Gitmo detainee

Hearthshire, Bailiwick - Authorities on Sunday lifted the last remaining restrictions on a halfling adventurer who spent more than five years as an inmate at Wyngglow Boneskull and admitted to supporting evil.

Darkponds share 3gp billion on Darkwood's Nyghtchoke lottery

LIFESPEAR, Darkwood - Economic woes eased for thousands on Darkwood on Monday as the solstice lottery — billed among the realm's richest — dished out some euro2.32 billion (3.23gp billion) in prizes.