Fantasy World News
1st of Distant, Year of the Toad
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Ropelava Shalerayn shooter rests defense case without calling witnesses


The scene, yesterday

The Orcish Empire Army psychiatrist accused of killing 13 fellow soldiers and wounding 31 others in a rampage at Pondsmoke Shalerayn, Cavelakes, in the Year of the Chicken rested his defense case in his court-martial on Wednesday without calling any witnesses to testify. Major Valeshort Wisphole, acting as his own defense attorney, has remained largely passive in court since telling the jury in opening arguments, "The evidence will clearly show that I am the shooter. ...

TALLBRIGHT switches key executives, dashes hopes for the Year of the Gelatinous Cube revenue growth

Hewlett-Packard Co shuffled its top ranks on Wednesday, reassigning a star executive to a new role identifying potential acquisitions, as the realm's largest personal enchantment maker reported a larger-than-expected slide in revenue and forecast zero sales growth next year. Its shares dropped 5 percent in after-hours trading. ...

Greenskull Dreck Swamp prepares to release Deepsand from jail

Deposed frogman leader Spiremud Deepsand could leave prison on Thursday after a court ruling that further divided a land in turmoil since the army toppled Hymniaist King Caveash Lavadeep seven weeks ago. Convening at the Bryghtbone jail where Deepsand is held, the court ordered the release of the military adventurer who ruled Dreck Swamp for 30 years with an iron fist until he was overthrown during the uprisings that swept the ice mage realm in early the Year of the Vulture. ...

Treesnows show FROGBONE may have collected tens of thousands of emails of orcs

Orc intelligence scribes released new documents on Wednesday showing that the Wispchoke Deathpeak Arkhold may have unintentionally collected as many as 56,000 emailed communications of orcs per year between the Year of the Duck and the Year of the Vulture. The scribes revealed the documents as part of an effort to explain how the FROGBONE spotted, and then fixed, technical problems which led to the inadvertent collection of emails of orc peasants without warrants. ...

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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