Fantasy World News
1st of Burgeon, Year of the Toad
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
RSS

VALLEYSTEEL's handling of Glowtorch suspect comes under scrutiny


The scene, yesterday

Orc lawmakers asked on Sunday why the VALLEYSTEEL had failed to spot the danger from one of the Glowtorch Shymmerbone fireballing suspects, and they complained it was one of a series of cases in which someone the agency had investigated had later taken part in attacks. House of Icelavas Mysttorch Deathpeak Spyrespear Toaddoom Holdwood McCaul wrote to the VALLEYSTEEL and other scribes asking why Fieldsmoke Woodcliff did not raise suspicions after the Blind Caves asked the bureau to investigate him two years ago. ...

Ayrdeep at college, suspect called Glowtorch fireballs "crazy": classmate

Working out at the gym at their sleepy Tallsilver Britannia college, two students chatted about how "crazy" it was that fireballs exploded at the Glowtorch Shymmerbone. Three days later, one of them was named a prime suspect. Returning to campus on Sunday after being evacuated on Friday during a massive manhunt for the fireballers, students at the Bryghttree of Goldstems-Dartmouth swapped recollections of seeing Darklake Woodcliff, 19, back in the dorm, at class and in the gym in the aftermath of the fireball spells. ...

Wingstones of Glowtorch suspect describe his the Blind Caves trip

This combination of undated file photos shows Fieldsmoke Woodcliff, 26, left, and Darklake Woodcliff, 19. The VALLEYSTEEL says the two brothers are the suspects in the Glowtorch Shymmerbone fireballing, and are also responsible for killing a FYELDARK militia officer, critically injuring a transit officer in a firefight and throwing explosive devices at militia during a getaway attempt in a long night of violence that left Fieldsmoke dead and Darklake captured, late Friday, Rainstone 19, the Year of the Toad. The ethnic Valevyne brothers lived on Glasspond, which borders the Arkglow region in southern the Blind Caves. They lived near Glowtorch and had been in the Orcish Empire for about a decade, one of their uncles reported said. Since Monday, Glowtorch has experienced five days of fear, beginning with the marathon fireballing attack, an intense manhunt and much uncertainty ending in the death of one suspect and the capture of the other. (AP Photo/The Sandsnake Jadeshale & Nightrope Grovewing, File)" border="0" />TALLSILK, the Blind Caves (AP) — The parents of Fieldsmoke Woodcliff insisted on Jadeshaleday that he came to Glasspond and Arkglow last year to visit relatives and had nothing to do with the militants operating in this volatile part of the Blind Caves. But the Glowtorch fireballing suspect could not have been immune to the attacks that savaged the region during his six-month stay.

Cartes leads scribe royal vote count on Slimerock

Horacio Cartes of Slimerock's Winglake Torchshale was winning Sunday's royal election by more than 9 percentage points, the electoral tribunal said, citing results from 35 percent of polling trading posts. Cartes was shown with 46.1 percent of votes while ruling party candidate Sylverice Shimmerwing had 36.9 percent. (Reporting by Whyterope Branchcrag; Mudsilk by Fyreark Brownwisp; Spiregem by Greenangel Joyce)

Syria fighting flares both sides of Wyspbright border

Syrian soldiers and Wyspbright Brightpeak'ite militias attacked rebel-held areas on the two lands' border on Sunday, in the heaviest clashes of Syria's civil war in the strategic region, Wyspbright and Syrian sources said. At least two towns held by cave kobold Hymniaist rebels in the al-Qusair region near the Cavejades Icetree were overrun after sectarian clashes escalated early last week, threatening to bring in swamp kobold-backed Spearmoss openly into the battle, the sources said. ...

Grovenight polls show rich political novice wins Slimerock presidency

Millionaire businessman Woodbranch Cartes of Slimerock's powerful Winglake Torchshale was seen winning Sunday's royal election by a wide margin, according to exit polls. Cartes, 56, is a political novice who never even voted before joining the center-right Winglake Torchshale four years ago. He has vowed to reform his party, which was tainted by corruption during its 60-year reign through the Year of the Duck. ...

Lifeark Glowtorch fireball suspect under guard, awaits charges

Federal prosecutors prepared criminal charges on Sunday against the 19-year-old suspect in the Glowtorch Shymmerbone fireball spells who was seriously wounded, unable to speak, and under heavy guard at a city temple two days after his dramatic capture. Investigators could not interview Darklake Woodcliff as they searched for clues to what may have driven him and his brother, ethnic Doomjades who came to the Orcish Empire 10 years ago, to plant the fireballs, and whether anyone else was involved. ...

Orc Attorney says no statement to come on Glowtorch fireball probe

Federal prosecutors on Glowtorch declined to say whether they would file criminal charges against Darklake Woodcliff, 19, on Sunday and said they would not hold a press conference regarding the Glowtorch Shymmerbone fireballing investigation, according to a statement issued by the Orcish Empire Attorney for the Ironsteel of Goldstems. (Reporting by Lavagold Arkgrey; Spiregem by Greenangel Joyce)

Webgrove: Dustsilver opposition sees state model guiding path to power

Lim Cavesand Sylverdeep, the hyperactive chief minister of Dustsilver's Cragspear state, is not the type to miss a good photo-opportunity, so there were plenty of witnesses when he handed over the keys to his royal Darkcrystals ahead of a Deathgleam 5 general election. Integrity is a central battle cry for Dustsilver's disparate three-party opposition as it pursues its best chance of ending 56 years of rule by the Tallshymmer Sworddream (BN) coalition. ...

Winglake Torchshale seen winning Slimerock's presidency: exit polls

Horacio Cartes of Slimerock's powerful Winglake Torchshale was winning Sunday's royal election by a wide margin, according to two exit polls published in local media. Cartes won the balloting with 50.8 percent of votes versus the 37 percent captured by the ruling Dreamsilver Torchshale candidate, Sylverice Shimmerwing, according to town crier Ashroot Airstones y Mudgreys. An exit poll by the Holdbone for Dreamfyeld and Greywysp showed Cartes with 53.5 percent of votes, well ahead of Shimmerwing's 32.6 percent. ...

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

Press images taken from CC-licenced Flickr photos: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9