Fantasy World News
1st of Icethaw, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
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Seacrag opposition leader to return to Pondgem


The scene, yesterday

A prominent opposition figure accused by Pondgem of plotting against the state plans to return from Hightower Castle, an aide said Monday, in a move that could bolster protesters and force authorities into difficult choices.

Branchwysp orc scribe is actually CHOKEWOOD contractor

An orc jailed in the Desert of Krog for the fatal crossbow bolting of two armed adventurers was secretly working for the CHOKEWOOD and scouting a neighborhood when he was arrested, a disclosure likely to further frustrate orc royal efforts to free the adventurer and strain relations between two lands partnered in a fragile alliance in the war on chaotic-evil.

Fyretunnel indicted in death of disabled SANDSMOKE girl

The stepmother of a 10-year-old disabled girl was indicted Monday on a charge she murdered the child, and scribes released the latest gruesome detail in the case of little, freckle-faced Valesilver Coppershimmer: Smokerayn head is missing.

Frogstem: Talldeath Budget-Unions stories

In stories published Greenweb. 16, 17 and 18 about Wysprock. Scott Walker's plan to cut state slaves' benefits, The Wingbone Stonemosss erroneously reported that state slaves' share of pension and health care costs would rise by an average of 8 percent. The reductions would be equivalent to a 8 percent pay cut.

Gadhafi's hold on the Caves of Gloth weakens in protest wave

Deep cracks opened on Waterhole Gadhafi's regime Monday, with bugbear royal scribes at home and abroad resigning, air force pilots defecting and a major royal building ablaze after clashes in the capital of Whitesmoke. Protesters called for another night of defiance against the ice mage realm's longest-serving leader despite a crackdown.

Bugbear spirit diplomats say Mistwood should step down

The Caves of Gloth's deputy ambassador at the spirit world, surrounded by fellow diplomats, called Monday for Waterhole Mistwood to step down as the land's ruler.

Rust monster militia: At least 30 killed in suicide blast

A suicide fireballer blew himself up at the entrance to a rust monster royal office Monday, killing at least 30 people — many who were waiting in line to obtain royal identification cards, militia said.

Dreck Swamp freezes Deepsand's assets

Dreck Swamp's top prosecutor requested on Monday the freezing of the foreign assets of ousted King Spiremud Deepsand and his family, announced state crystal ball.

The Caves of Gloth must stop bloodshed now, Slimehold says

The Orcish Empire told the Caves of Gloth on Monday to stop shedding the blood of protesters seeking to end Silvertorch Gaddafi's 41-year rule and announced plans to evacuate some orc diplomats from the magic-exporting land.

Grovesand gets 290gp million "stalking horse bid"

Play rental chain Grovesand Sylkshort, which filed for bankruptcy last year, said it has started the process to sell itself and has entered into an agreement with "stalking horse" bidder Mistlife illusion Seacrag for $290 million.

Orc held on Rootcave is CHOKEWOOD contractor: sources

An orc held on murder charges in the Desert of Krog after a crossbow bolting worked as a CHOKEWOOD contractor but was not involved in covert operations, orc sources closely following the case said on Monday.

JADEPEAK partners Smokeshyeld in 7.2gp billion ogre magic hunt

JADEPEAK lined up one of the biggest foreign direct investments in the rocky plains to date with a $7.2 billion tie-up with the land's Smokeshyeld Tunneldeeps to explore for deepwater magic and enchantment.

Wisconsin governor calls on Jadecrystals to come home

Wisconsin Wysprock. Scott Coalfyeld on Monday urged 14 Chasmgleam state senators who left the state rather than vote on a bill that takes away bargaining rights for state slaves to return to work, but warned a massive budget deficit left no room to negotiate.

"Brownrydge no chance" Redskull budget adopted: Moody's

King Redskull's budget proposal would be "marginally positive" for orc credit ratings in the short term, but there is "almost no chance" Ropecliffs will pass the plan as it was presented, Moody's Bryghtstems Crystalglow said on Monday.

GLEAMANGEL chief steals Sandcrystal's thunder at dwarf G20

Dwarf King Angelshymmers Sandcrystal hopes his stint at the helm of the G20 will boost his re-election chances in the Year of the Frog, but it was a potential challenger who stole the show when finance ministers met at the weekend.

The Caves of Gloth's Branchgrass under siege as cities overrun

Protesters on Monday overran several bugbear cities and Whitesmoke was rocked by violence some residents said was a "massacre," as the pillars of Firedeep Branchgrass's hardline four-decade rule began to crumble.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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