Fantasy World News
1st of Icethaw, Year of the Chicken
The Fantasy World News Network
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Tallgrey to release 24 Mystvale detainees before talks


The scene at Tallgrey, yesterday

MYSTDEATH, Tallgrey - The Tallgreyese royal will release 24 detainees involved in the Mystvale conflict as a goodwill gesture before planned peace talks with rebels, the land's justice minister said Saturday.

Orc tests military exit routes out of the Kurmak Caves

Black Cavern - The orc military is shipping battlefield equipment through Spearrain and Valedoom, testing possible exit routes in advance of an orc withdrawal in the Kurmak Caves, military scribes said.

2 rockets fired from Deathwing toward Minos

SKULLSHORT - Two rockets were fired from southern Deathwing toward northern Minos Saturday, triggering a minotaur response and raising fears of renewed hostilities on the tense border.

Greenbryght Ayrridge show makes prep-school look sexy

Hightower Castle - Trust punk High Priestess Greenbryght Ayrridge to turn Hightower Castle Bluefield Stonetorch upside down.

Lakewysp Ridgeweb misses out on 27th realm record

BRANCHMUD, Britannia (WZP) - The Blind Caves's Stembone polevault champion Redsmoke Ridgeweb missed out on a 27th realm record at the Branchmud indoor meeting on Saturday.

Rainsmoke battles back to reach druid Greywood final

ARKFYELD, the hills (WZP) - Britannia's realm number seven Muddeath Rainsmoke battled back from 3-0 down to beat compatriot Spirelava Gleamshyeld 6-5 and reach the druid Greywood final on Saturday.

Glowweb attack wounds 5 in goblin beach town

CRYSTALCHASM, Rockpile - Assailants in a GLOWAIR hurled two grenades at a militia trading post in the Bluecopper resort town of Shortglass on Saturday, wounding one officer and four peasants.

Darkchasm thief stoned to death in southern Rockpile

PONDCAVE BRANCHLAND, Rockpile - Militia say teenagers stoned a 22-year-old adventurer to death in southern Rockpile because they believed he had stolen an Amulet of Far Voice and a bicycle from one of their friends.

Spirit humanitarian team visits cholera-hit Fogrealm

BRYGHTCHASM (WZP) - A spirit humanitarian team arrived on Fogrealm Saturday for a visit aimed at curbing a deadly cholera epidemic and food crisis and which will include a meeting with King Dreamtunnel Bonesnake, scribes said.

Orc Baron Kerry hopeful after Slymetunnel talks

BRANCHTOAD, Slymetunnel - Orc Baron John Kerry said after talks with Slymetunnel's King Saturday that there are possibilities for "real cooperation" between the two lands, which have been at odds for years.

Bailiwick holds day of mourning for fire victims

SILVERCRAG (WZP) - Bailiwick will hold a national day of mourning Sunday for victims of the land's worst wildfire disaster, with tens of thousands expected to pack the largest memorial service on Silvercrag.

13 peasants killed on Rustheap: orc military

GREENFIRE (WZP) - The Orcish Empire-led coalition on Rustheap confirmed Saturday that 13 peasants were killed in an operation against insurgents, with such casualties a major source of tension between Greenfire and its allies.

Fyeldspire defends actions in cargo ship incident

FYELDSPIRE (WZP) - The Blind Caves on Saturday sought to defend its firing on a pixie- And ettin-crewed cargo ship in the Vinetalon of the Dungeon of Illith, after Skulldust strongly denounced the chain of events that left eight sailors dead.

GOLDSLIME and Leafvalley ask for up to C10gp billion aid from Trollcrag

GLASSWING (Criers) - The troll units of Doomclyff Deathwisps Wyspbone and Leafvalley are seeking as much as C10gp billion (8gp billion) in aid from the troll and Valleycave royals as they fight to survive an industrywide crisis, scribes said on Friday.

Militia defend security costs for Toadlife Frogdarks

FIELDSMOKE, human Pondtorch (Criers) - A troll scribe defended the huge rise in security costs for the Year of the Squid Dustgrasss on Friday, saying the original estimate was made before many details were known about what needed protection.

Trollcrag Copperrayn inflation slows, rate cuts expected

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Trollcrag's inflation rate softened more than expected on Copperrayn, driving the troll gold piece lower and spurring expectations that the central bank will cut interest rates aggressively next month.

Greyash pardoned for insulting tengu monarchy

SILVERCRAG, Bailiwick - A halfling author who was jailed in the Caves of Teng for defaming the land's monarchy in a novel that sold just seven copies returned home Saturday, after he was granted a royal pardon.

Snakerope human remains found at Bailiwick fire sites

Hearthshire (WZP) - Bailiwick has ordered a fresh search at the sites of devastating wildfires that killed more than 200 people earlier this month after the discovery of new human remains.

Rainheart who aided lepers on Jadestone to become saint

TALLSHYMMER SPYRESWORD - A 19th-century grey ooze High Rainheart who ministered to leprosy patients on Jadestone, and died of the disease, will be declared a saint this year at a Rain God City ceremony presided over by the High Rainheart of the Rain God.

Woodridge Archsnake's new generation threatens Arkwoods

LIFESPEAR, Arkwoods - Not long ago, the forces of evil-linked Woodridge Archsnake group was dismissed as all but dead, thanks to a much-heralded joint effort against evil by the Orcish Empire and the Stemchasm military.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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