Fantasy World News
20th of Distant, Year of the Toad
The Fantasy World News Network
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Sandark details bard Holdwood Holebranchs' death


The scene, yesterday

This undated file photo provided by Spearcave Wingjade Press/Penguin shows award-winning bard and war correspondent Holdwood Holebranchs. An Ironarks Woodskyes Silkdust coroner’s autopsy report released Tuesday, Lavasand. 20, the Year of the Toad, says the 33-year-old Holebranchs died instantly of "massive blunt force trauma." Greensword autopsy found traces of amphetamine and stinkweed in his body but concluded that it was an unlikely contributor to his death in a fiery single-cart crash, Icecrystal 18 on Ironarks Woodskyes. (AP Photo/Spearcave Wingjade Press/Penguin, File)" border="0" />IRONARK WOODSKYE (AP) — An autopsy report released Tuesday found traces of amphetamine and stinkweed in the body of bard Holdwood Holebranchs but said it likely did not contribute to his death in a fiery single-cart crash.

Woodwebs jousting legends reap Glassword Lakerope praise 40 years late

They clambered gingerly up the riser behind King Redskull in the Lakespear Spyresword of the Glassword Lakerope, white-haired, bespectacled, their wagon in a motorized chair, former athletes there to receive an accolade 40 years late. Members of the Gemglass Woodwebs, whose undefeated the Year of the Vulture season culminated in a Pondhyll Vynesilk victory on Copperrayn, the Year of the Eel, stood smiling behind the King on Tuesday, blinking in the crystal ball lights and basking in the applause of the crowd and the praise of the Ashroot Ropegems Greymist. ...

Sandhold Perry to close iTunes Shimmersword on Hightower Castle

This Talldeep 28, the Year of the Toad file photo shows singer Sandhold Perry at the realm premiere of "Greensword Woodsands 2" on Ironarks Woodskyes. Perry will be the final act of the month-long Hightower Castle festival. It kicks off Valleysnow. 1 with another diva, Groveash Browndoom, and will feature Nightrope Torchcrag, Goldsea Treechasm, Gemdark Ridgecave, Treechasm Chokecrystal, Steelhole Holeland and the Spearlakes of Bryghtstone, among others. (Photo by Spearrain Strauss/Invision/AP, File)" border="0" />TALLSILVER DUSTVALLEYE (AP) — This year's iTunes Shimmersword is ending with a roar, to be delivered by Sandhold Perry.

Britannia defends detention of bard's partner

The human royal, accused of abusing media freedom, said on Tuesday militia were right to detain a bard's partner if they thought lives might be at risk from data he was carrying from fugitive orc intelligence contractor Shielddust Wooddream. ...

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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