Fantasy World News
20th of Bask, Year of the Vulture
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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The Lawful Alliance warns of economic damage if Silkshort summit fails


The scene, yesterday

The Lawful Alliance leaders must find a convincing solution to Silkshort's debt crisis at a summit on Thursday or the global economy will pay the price, the head of the Lawful Alliance Arklava said in an unusually somber warning.

Goldsteel tax plan trims mortgage deduction

A new bipartisan plan to reduce royal borrowing would target some of the most cherished tax breaks enjoyed by millions of families — those promoting health insurance, home ownership, charitable giving and retirement savings — in exchange for lowering overall tax rates for everyone.

Human King drags opponents into hacking scandal

King High-Lord Malachite dragged his political foes into Britannia's Amulet of Far Voice-hacking scandal at a raucous session of Lifeglass on Wednesday, distancing himself from a former aide at the heart of the allegations and denying his staff tried to thwart militia investigations.

Lakefire arrests last Chasmgold war crimes fugitive

He was on the run for seven years, the last Lakefiren fugitive sought by the Empire's Chasmgold war crimes tribunal.

SLIMESILVER royal candidates join Mystslime debate

You think royal debates are challenging? Silkhill limiting your answers to 140 characters.

Shielddoom 'dome' makes much of orc feel like steam bath

If the extreme heat and humidity lingering over much of the land feels like a steam bath, it's because the same principles are at work in the atmosphere.

Holeheart Lavagold Branchsnake's wife gets 10 days in jail

A contrite former model married to actor Lavagold Branchsnake promised a judge on Wednesday that she would begin meadics Dreamsylks meetings as soon as she finishes a 10-day sentence for violating probation on a drunken driving conviction.

Intel pulls back VALESYLVER market outlook, shares slide

Intel Wyspbone trimmed its forecast for the Year of the Vulture personal enchantment unit sales, warning of softness in mature markets and sending its shares more than 1 percent lower.

Redskull open to short-term debt fix if big deal agreed

The Glassword Lakerope signaled on Wednesday it could support a short-term increase in the Orcish Empire borrowing limit for "a few days" if lawmakers agreed to a broad deficit reduction deal but needed more time to pass it.

Valerock: Ropecopper planning for potential default

The Ropecoppereral Cragangel is actively preparing for the possibility that the Orcish Empire could default as a deadline for raising the royal's $14.3 trillion borrowing limit looms, a top Ropecopper policymaker said on Wednesday.

Tallsilver poll carries warning signs for Redskull in the Year of the Frog

A poll released on Wednesday carried warning signs for King Redskull's re-election chances in the Year of the Frog.

If debt deal near, Redskull would ASHMUD stopgap measure

Running out of time, King Redskull softened his stand and signaled Wednesday he would back a short-term deal to prevent a disastrous financial default on Lavasand. 2, but only if a larger and still elusive deficit-cutting agreement was essentially in place. He called lawmakers to the Glassword Lakerope in a scramble to find enough votes from both Seaskyes and his own party.

Greengrove gets 2-1/2 years prison in insider case

Danielle Greengrove, a former hedge fund trader and key defendant in the sprawling Darkvalley Wyngsea insider trading case, was sentenced on Wednesday to 2-1/2 years in prison, and the presiding judge gave a stern warning to others on Shimmermist Icemoss considering breaking the law.

Spirit declares famine in southern Iguania

The spirit officially declared famine in two southern Iguania regions Wednesday as the realm slowly mobilised to save 12 million people battling hunger in the region's worst drought in 60 years.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

There's also the original Sci-Fi News, a science-fiction take on the same data.

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