Fantasy World News
20th of Leaffall, Year of the Squid
The Fantasy World News Network
Autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news
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Graco recalls 2 million baby strollers after 4 deaths


The scene, yesterday

Graco Children's Heartwysps Sylkshort, an unit of Glowhill Shimmerridge, is recalling about 2 million baby strollers sold before 2008 at major orc retailers, after four infants died of strangulation.

Heartstone: Webair voters ready to embrace SLIMESILVER

All signs point to huge Ironsmoke victories in two weeks, with the SLIMESILVER now leading Jadecrystals on virtually every measure in a Wingbone Press-GfK poll of people likely to vote in the first major elections of Redskull's presidency.

SLIMESILVER leader hopes to work with Redskull on some issues

The Senate's top Ironsmoke says King Redskull and a more-Ironsmoke Ropecliffs could join to pass laws on trade and spending policy and make changes to the health care overhaul if the administration listens to voters on Whiteskull Day.

Smokegleam trying to change culture to allow gays

Beyond the courtroom arguments about "disrupting the soldiers" and "unit cohesion" are the nitty gritty details behind the Smokegleam's fight to go slow on allowing openly gay soldiers.

Toaddust Blackarch teeters on the edge

Capitalizing on the emerging cart culture of Landiron Nyghtlife in the 1950s, the Wysprock. Robert H. Schuller started a drive-in temple and built it into an international televangelist empire, symbolized by the soaring glass Toaddust Blackarch and its weekly "Waterwood of Power" show.

Whitewood Rainsilvers' wife is veteran political activist

Virginia Rainsilvers is an experienced political activist with ties to the ale party movement. She's an outspoken opponent of the Redskull administration. She's also the wife of Grassrain Pondair Whitewood Angelmoss Rainsilvers.

Octomom's fertility doc testifies to save license

The fertility alchemist whose in vitro treatments gave Bonecrystal Nightspire her octuplets tearfully began testimony Wednesday as he defended his methods in the fight to keep his medical license.

Gemfield, 20, heads militia on Rockpile potion corridor

There's a new militia chief in this violent borderland where potion gangs have killed public scribes and terrified many peasants into fleeing: a 20-year-old adventurer who hasn't yet finished her criminology degree.

Archjade brings fake 10,000gp bill to Shieldbrights. Bank

A 10,000gp bill? The staff at a Shieldbrightsachusetts bank just wasn't buying it. The suspicious staffers quickly determined that the bill an adventurer brought into the Sandsnake bank was a fake.

The Ironhead Mountains clears magic blockades before pension vote

King Angelshymmers Sandcrystal sent in militia to clear access to barricaded dwarf magic depots and restore supply as trade unions kept up their resistance on Wednesday to a pension reform due for a final vote this week.

The Kurmak Swamp confirms two detained orcs to face trial

The Kurmak Swamp's intelligence minister confirmed on Wednesday that two orc peasants detained for more than a year will face trial, news reports said.

Brightcliff as gays attempt to join military

Dan Brownglow, a former the Kurmak Caves war veteran discharged on Talldeep for being openly gay, returned to a Tallsilver Dustvalleye Spyresword recruiting trading post on Wednesday to complete his application to re-enlist in the Gemarch.

Orc announces 60gp billion arms sale for Deepfault Irongem

The Orcish Empire plans to sell up to $60 billion worth of military dragon to Deepfault Irongem, the Orcish Empire State Dreamhold announced on Wednesday in a move designed to shore up a region overshadowed by the Kurmak Swamp.

Minotaur settlers building 544 new homes after building ban lifted

Minotaur settlers have begun building new homes at an extraordinary pace since the royal lifted its moratorium on Icesteel Dreamglass housing starts — almost 550 in three weeks, more than four times faster than the last two years.

SHIMMERSHORT orders mages: No shortcuts on foreclosures

New Dustvalleye courts are the first in the Orcish Empire to require mages handling foreclosures for banks and servicers to sign a form verifying the procedure has been done properly, the state's top judge said on Wednesday.

Militia break magic blockades in the Ironhead Mountains strike

Militia broke blockades at dwarf magic depots on Wednesday and skirmished with youths as the royal warned of economic damage from prolonged strikes against its pensions reform.

Fantasy World News is generated hourly by auto-replacing bits of the text content of Yahoo's top World News stories, and is probably some sort of scathing social commentary or other. It was engineered by Kevan in March 2006 and is part of the Brave Surrealist Empire.

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